Um. Can I ask for some advice?

[Vaporeae]

Um, hello. I'm new here, so hi and I hope I'll fit in here, but I'd like some advice. I'd rather not post any more of my novel on here, not after realising that if I ever wanted to break into the publishing business, which I hope I someday will, then I ought to post my novel sparingly. So I won't post the scene in question, but I would like to simply ask something. I've already posted it on my other guild, and have edited it accordingly, but I'd like some all round advice, so I can use it in the future. Because, no doubt, I will ask a similar question again, so I may as well learn what I can now.

Well, I just wrote my first death scene a few days ago. It was my main character's death, and rather early on in the story, but both these points were essential for the story. This character, Jack, is actually my favourite character right now and it was very hard to write. I honestly didn't want to kill him, especially after his life was so dismal and he's only thirteen at the time of his death. But even though the story continues into the afterlife, I want the readers to think, well, that it's the end when the chapter finishes. I want it to be really dramatic, really sad and rather quick and sudden.

Well, my question is, how do you make a death scene really effective? If you need details about how he dies, he is shot by a mysterious man who isn't mentioned at all in future plot. He's just the murderer, basically. The main character, Jack, is also homeless, half starved and never knew his parents. He doesn't have a birth certificate, or an official name, nor anyone to care for him (his 'adopter' died of a stroke when he was five). So he probably wouldn't have a funeral.

Well, what is good about death scenes? I know they're rather morbid, and particularly 'gasp-out-loud-ish', (at least for me) but how do you make a good one? Because, though I've been told it's dramatic already, (you know who you are ;D) I'd like to get advice for when I do it again. So, please help. I really appreciate it ^-^ !
 

[evolvingwolf]

Imagery and detail! The more you can elaborate and draw the person in, the more in your face the scene will be. If you ever need any real detailed advice, feel free to comment me.  

[Alanora Calaran]

What Evo said. If you want samples of murder scenes that I have written, feel free to PM me and I'll send them to you, but I'll warn you I haven't gotten any of them edited yet. By the way, I think you're doing really good with it. xd  

[Magmatic]

Death scenes are very fun, especially if the reader is viewing them from the perspective of the character, as in what I posted. You can get into the characters final thoughts, feelings, unanswered questions, everything. You can play out death in so many ways it's ridiculous. You could simply have them black out, you could have them see the pearly gates (or the not-so-pearly gates if that's the case), or they could hang around in a grassy meadow and become a ghost stuck between worlds.

I personally tend to write my death scenes with the emotions of characters and readers in mind. As an author, you have a LOT of power over your readers emotions, use it. If a reader gets passionate for a character, and then they have a very emotional impact upon their death, that will make for a very good read.

 

[Evermore Reality]

The most valuable tool of the writer is the ability to be as emathetic as possible, but as detatched as necessary. Meaning, your love for this character can either drag this scene down or bring it to life. If the book is written in 1st person (I don't know) then you're ina unique position to describe his deat, perhaps as all color leaving the world or as his senses exploding in one last bid for life. You can encompass a few, tiny seconds in the span of several paragraphs and make his death both dramatic and swift.

3rd person requires the oposite effect. Rather than closing in on his emotions the scene must pull away and abandon him, dead and alone on the streets below.

Either way, your love for this character and sadness over his death must carry into the piece to strengthen it. Remember, he's not dying alone. Thousands of readers are with him for that last breath and you must make them mourn for him, even though no one is his world ever will.  

[Gwendoline-the-Dark]

Well, my advice would be to not kill off your character too early. If you do there won't be any emotional atatchment to the character. Give it a few chapters so that the reader can really know Jack in life before they know him in death. It will make his death meaningful to the reader.
Also follow the advice forementioned here and you should do excellently.  

[Serge-RadicalDreamer]

They are many effective ways to craft a death scene in my opinion. Here's a few:

1. Brutally short - happens without meaning, warning, or any answers following. This will shock the reader, as they did not see it coming, giving them the feeling that anything is possible in this work. Also, that death happens, sometimes for no reason at all.

2. Brutal- a macabre death, handled well, can be like plunging a knife straight into the reader's heart. If they care about the character, they feel every ounce of life bleeding away from the main character, as if it were their own. They cannot bear to read it, yet cannot look away, anxious to find out what happens next.

3. Poetic- to me, this is the most difficult. Your character has to go out with style, beautifully, though not so indulgently that the writer's love of the character screams off the page: "You love this character! watch him/her die! you are supposed to feel great sadness right now!" that can be a difficult line to traverse.

usually i try to do a mix of #1 and #3- give the character's life some meaning or importance or significance. if not cosmically, then at least to those around them, or even to the dying character his/herself. but, cut it a little short, to avoid over-doing it, and to keep the reader thinking about it.

that's more a skeletal outline without any details :/ hope it helps...  

[Stoobs is back]

Read pretty much anything by Michael Crichton.

He was very good at writing deaths, mainly because so many people die in his books rofl  

[MusicMakesSense]

Lets start by doing what every author should do with every character: get in his mind.

He's thirteen, homeless, and he's never known his parents. He's shot for no reason.

Though this is all I know, I can get into his psych a little:

- He's only 13, he should fear death, and wish he had the chance to live our more of his life.
- He's lived in poverty his entire life, which should strengthen the feeling of lost potential.
- Once again, not knowing his parents leaves unanswered questions - something we all dread.
- He should be confused along with fearful, not knowing why he's being shot, or by who.

With all this, he should have all these thoughts rushing through his head at once, as he processes through all the other emotions and the pain of death.

Finally, you should leave a final line of his last thought; something that really exemplifies what he spent his life on. If not that, then make it a point, something like "My last thought was how plain unfair it was for it to have to be me." Make a message; Life isent fair. (Or something of that nature.)

Hope I helped!