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1. What is your full name?
Dimitri Verloren.
2. Where and when were you born?
I was born in a city called Argon in 1985.
3. Who are/were your parents? (Know their names, occupations, personalities, etc.)
My mother's name was Bianca. Her side of the family was Italian and she was raised as a Christian like my father, Johann, who was German. My father was the pastor of the local church while my mother stayed at home to look after my sister and I. She was always quiet, but knew when and how to fix things when something went wrong. My father was similar in that he always knew what to say to bring someone spirits up and even when I 'came out of the closet', as the saying goes, he was not angry.
4. Do you have any siblings? What are/were they like?
The last time I saw my sister, Analise, was when she was five. She was a bit of a tomboy, always coming home with skinned knees or some sort of insect in her hands.
5. Where do you live now, and with whom? Describe the place and the person/people.
I live in a hotel room in a city called Neon, which is completely unlike where I came from. It would probably be described as the party city and to be honest, I have no complaints. It's a small room, but really home-y. It's got black walls, hardwood floors and a white ceiling... oh, and white baseboards. It's fairly high up, too; higher than the surrounding buildings, so at night, I have a great view of the city, which is beautiful at night. Not much in it right now except for a matress on the floor, a laptop and my CDs and movies... and some clothes.
6. What is your occupation?
I work in a night club, sometimes as a bartender, other nights, I'm a waiter and every once in a while, I'll be up on stage. It's always fun seeing new faces, catching up with acquaintances and listening to loud music.
7. Write a full physical description of yourself. You might want to consider factors such as: height, weight, race, hair and eye color, style of dress, and any tattoos, scars, or distinguishing marks.
My hair is black and fairly long in both the back and the front; my bangs are a little past eyebrow level, and they're almost always swept to the right side, unless they've chosen to go against my will. The rest falls just above my shoulders. As far as physique is concerned, I'm pretty stick-like; 6'1" and weighing 162lbs which has earned me the nicknames "stickbug" and "xylophone". Not too pleased with it, but I have to admit that I like my eyes; they're a really icy shade of blue, almost like aqua aura quartz. My clothing isn't anything too special though. I like my skinny jeans, patterned hoodies, graphic T-shirts and converse shoes. I'm also into piercings; several ear piercings - on the left side, I have an industrial, I have my tragus pierced and two rings, and on the right, I have two small rings through the upper part of my ear, and a 8-gauge plug through the lobe-y part- and a lip ring. No tattoos yet, but I'm sure once something meaningful happens, I'll have to dedicate a small patch of flesh to it. I'm not sure why, but piercings and tattoos are extremely attractive.
8. To which social class do you belong?
There isn't really a social class in Neon. I'm pretty comfortable where I am right now.
9. Do you have any allergies, diseases, or other physical weaknesses?
The perfumes some girls (and guys) wear always winds up making my eyes water and makes me cough... would that be considered an allergy?
10. Are you right- or left-handed?
Leftie. Woohoo!
11. What does your voice sound like?
I'm not sure how to describe it. It's not super low, but it's not like a fairy either. It's about mid-tone... maybe a teensy bit lower than high. When singing, it can go any way, from almost operatic to somewhere close to pop. I've been told my voice sounds a lot like Davey Havok, so I started off performing AFI covers before coming up with my own music.
12. What words and/or phrases do you use very frequently?
[laughs] "Oh snap"! Also, when I'm tired, I tend to say "motherdouchebags"... Damn you, Metalocalypse!
13. What do you have in your pockets?
What? I'm just happy to see you.
I'm joking. I've got my iPod and some spare change.
14. Do you have any quirks, strange mannerisms, annoying habits, or other defining characteristics?
Chewing my lip or playing with my lip ring. I'll just be sitting there and someone will shoot me a strange look, and it'll be like... oh crap, I pulled some skin off my lip. Ew.
Part 2: Growing Up
15. How would you describe your childhood in general?
Pretty quiet. My dad had wanted me to follow in his footsteps and be a preist, but that never really worked out. I was never into sports, either; I enjoyed reading or helping out in the kitchen. Public school was "fun" though; I was sort of the alienated kid in the corner who everyone thought was gay... how's that for irony? I admit, it wasn't all that bad as I had a couple friends to spend time at lunch with, but you know how schools are.
16. What is your earliest memory?
My earliest memory was of a summer fairground. The clowns were terrifying, and I was ill riding the only rollercoaster I could psych myself up for, but the one thing that I'll always remember was that big, red balloon my father got to cheer me up after I let my ice cream melt.
17. How much schooling have you had?
I made it about half way through grade twelve before leaving home.
18. Did you enjoy school?
It wasn't terrible, but I wouldn't go back. Too much drama, and by "drama", I mean the stupid kind of "like oh em gee, I thought you were, like, going out with me, not that whore" drama... Maybe I will go back just for the laughs.
19. Where did you learn most of your skills and other abilities?
I learned a lot from school, but that was mostly textbook stuff. When I was on my own, of course, I found out just how much I had taken for granted. It was kind of fun though; for a while, I was living under a bridge with a couple of runaway kids my age - seventeen. I think we all learned that having people around to watch your back is great. As far as my "vampire abilities", if you will, I learned a lot of that on my own. True, I did have people who knew a bit about the basics, but it's kind of like a jigsaw puzzle; if it doesn't work, try something else.
20. While growing up, did you have any role models? If so, describe them.
Not really. I was very shy, so I guess anyone who could go up to someone and introduce themselves?
21. While growing up, how did you get along with the other members of your family?
We were just the average family; if my sister and I did something well, we were congratulated. If something went wrong, we were corrected - not with violence, mind you. I've seen The Shining, and it wasn't anything close to that kind of "correction" - and sent up to our rooms to think about what we had done. My sister and I liked to go for walks sometimes and have little contests over who had found the most pennies along the way.
22. As a child, what did you want to be when you grew up?
Growing up with my dad, I'd thought I'd always wanted to follow his path. I definately wanted to be someone who could reach out and touch people... wait, that sounded wrong. I mean, I wanted to help someone, anyone and everyone I could.
23. As a child, what were your favorite activities?
Reading and drawing were definately my favorite things to do. When I was older, I helped my mother, or even did all the cooking myself, which was fun. Rewarding, too, so long as nothing caught fire... which only happened once, thank you very much.
24. As a child, what kinds of personality traits did you display?
I was quiet as a boy, always willing to follow direction and staying out of the way when I wasn't needed.
25. As a child, were you popular? Who were your friends, and what were they like?
Popularity? Are you kidding? I was nobody! Not that it was a bad thing; I don't want to think of what it was like for all the Mary Sues and Gary Stus that walked around in designer clothing, threw beer bashes... and had to keep that up to maintain their status. I had mainly acquaintances, but my best friend would have had to be Aiden. We lived on the same street, and he would come to church with his parents every Sunday, so we sort of became close friends. Very close friends.
26. When and with whom was your first kiss?
Yes, it was Aiden. He had been invited to a party and dragged me along with him. In hindsight, we should have known that there was a hidden ingrediant in the fruit punch, but it was all there was that wasn't obviously a bottle of vodka, scotch or beer. So, more than slightly buzzed on our stagger back home, it just sort of happened.
27. Are you a virgin? If not, when and with whom did you lose your virginity?
No, no. I'm still waiting for that special someone.
28. If you are a supernatural being (i.e. mage, werewolf, vampire), tell the story of how you became what you are or first learned of your own abilities. If you are just a normal human, describe any influences in your past that led you to do the things you do today.
Hearing about the supernatural is nothing strange where I'm from; magic-users still put in the same 9-5 office hours as the average Joe, elves go down to the supermarket for milk and eggs with the family, and vampires party at night. After leaving home, I wandered around a lot. The kids I was staying with were eventually tracked down and taken back home by the police, so I was on my own after that. I was bitten by a vampire while taking what I thought was a shortcut through an alleyway (yes, my natural hair colour is blonde), which is where... when... gah... I was picked up by a couple who had offered to help, if I was "willing to participate in a test-cure for vampyrism". I was taken to a laboratory where I met a young angel-girl named Myra with whom I grew very close; a sort of father-daughter bond. Not sure how many years too many I was there, but there were tests upon tests to the point where my arms had so many puncture marks, I could have been mistaken for some sort of heroin addict. Anyways, back to this so-called "cure": it turns out that I had been the first vampire-bite victim they got a hold of (you know, before they turn into a ghoul). They gave me vampire blood and, to my great discomfort, kept track of the transformation. They then injected me with every type of "cure" they had come up with. They must have had something right, as I was half-cured (I guess), but funding had been cut and I was supposed to be "terminated", as they said. Lucky for me, there was an attack by a resistance group - the Teiko - based in Neon. They bombed part of the facility and managed to rescue a number of people, including myself and Myra. I've since joined their little group, which is more like one big family than anything. It's really great.
Part 3: Past Influences
29. What do you consider the most important event of your life so far?
The first time I went out with the Teiko. It wasn't anything like bombing a building; just delivering medical supplies to a small camp just outside the city limits. They were all people who had escaped from the facility, but were too changed from experiments to be accepted into a "normal" world. It really showed me that there is always someone worse off and to look with both your eyes and - cheese alert - your heart.
30. Who has had the most influence on you?
Everyone I've met has influenced me in some way, whether it's a catchy phrase, something to inspire art or lyrics, a way of thinking... anything.
31. What do you consider your greatest achievement?
Delivering medical supplies to that camp. It was exhausting, both mentally and physically, but the looks on the childrens' faces, the feeling of thanks from the adults and elders, the knowledge that somehow, I had made that moment at least a little bit better, however fleeting it may have been was worth it.
32. What is your greatest regret?
I'm not sure I regret anything. True, I sometimes wonder what things would be like were I still with my parents, but then I think of all I've acheived here and think that it's better this way.
33. What is the most evil thing you have ever done?
I'd gotten into a sugar-rush one day, and decided to put coloured drink crystals in the shower heads in the bathrooms of the hotel I lived in (it's a sort of add-on above the club I work, so rent is free). For inquiring minds, it was cherry, and a dark shade of red, too. They still don't know it was me, so shh.
34. Do you have a criminal record of any kind?
Not reeeeeeeeally...
35. When was the time you were the most frightened?
My transformation from human to vampire. It hurt like crazy, but I didn't know where the pain was coming from, or why, or how to stop it. I was also in a bright room for observation... you know when light is so bright that closing your eyes doesn't make it any better? It was that for close to three hours. I had also been strapped down on the gurney so I couldn't hurt myself in any way. I mean, it wouldn't have been as bad if I could have just curled into a ball or something, but no... psh...
36. What is the most embarrassing thing ever to happen to you?
The first time I got drunk. The bar I was at/work at had karaoke on that same night... there were a few Queen songs... I was incredibly drunk... I'll be Freddie Mercury is turning in his grave as we speak.
37. If you could change one thing from your past, what would it be, and why?
Going back to the earlier question on regrets, I wouldn't change a thing. I'm quite happy with where I am at the moment and doubt things would be like this were I "normal".
38. What is your best memory?
Waking up and finding that I was free. After leaving home, I guess I was sort of free, but in a way, I was trapped by several things: no money, no real help and no real work skills. After I was taken from the laboratory, the first thing I remember doing is waking up in a warm bed in what some people may have thought was a run-down kind of room, but I would not have wanted anything more. I also remember there being someone there (I never got a name, but I would recognize the face) telling me to go back to sleep and that "things were being taken care of", which - as I later found out - translated to getting a job and a place to live.
39. What is your worst memory?
There are kind of two, the first being my time in the lab. Tests went anywhere from taking blood samples and testing physical limits, to testing the regenerative abilities of vampires which meant varying sizes and depths of cuts, losing a finger or - and this only happened once - my right arm. The second would have to be the time in between realizing I was gay and telling my father. There was so much dread and anxiety that I had been building up, and I eventually cracked, which is when I told him.
Part 4: Beliefs And Opinions
40. Are you basically optimistic or pessimistic?
I wouldn't really classify myself as either; sometimes I have a positive outlook on things, and other times, I find myself in despair. It really depends on the situation and my mental state at the time. If I'm in a good mood and it's not something huge, then I don't go into "we're all gonna die" mode.
41. What is your greatest fear?
My greatest fear is that I'll do something terrible that I can't un-do, or that something horrible will happen and while I may have been able to do something, couldn't get there in time, or otherwise unable to help out.
42. What are your religious views?
I had been raised as a Christian all my life, but upon going out into the "real world", I sort of lost that manner of thinking. I'm not the anti-christ or anything, but I don't believe there is a god. There is definately a higher power out there, but it's more like Fate than an almighty ruler.
43. What are your political views?
I'll use the cop-out answer of "everyone should be equal". Which is true. I don't think anyone should be discriminated against for anything; it's how they live, and if someone else has a problem with it, they can keep it to themselves.
44. What are your views on sex?
Wear a condom? Ask permission first? [laughs] I don't know. I believe it should be a matter of trust and commitment, not a wham-bam-thank-you-ma'am affair.
45. Are you able to kill? Under what circumstances do you find killing to be acceptable or unacceptable?
Yes, unfortunately, I have found myself able to take a life and it was for the exact same reason most anyone else would kill; self-preservation. The lab had sent men out to look for the experiments that had escaped - myself included. They even came into the club I worked and recognized me despite the fact that my appearance had changed from long-blonde-haired-pretty-boy to skinny-dark-pale-as-hell-um... thing. That night, I shot three men before they had even pulled out their weapons, and bit the fourth. Thank god vampires aren't dependant on blood like in those myths. Experiencing someone else's life is kind of creepy.
46. In your opinion, what is the most evil thing any human being could do?
Lie. There is nothing more disgusting than covering up or dancing around the truth, especially when it occurs in the government... which is almost second-nature to them. It might be a nhilistic way of thinking, but the truth is there is corruption everywhere; nothing is fair, nothing is completely true. The truth may hurt more, as the saying goes, but at least it's real and proven with good, strong evidence.
47. Do you believe in the existence of soul mates and/or true love?
Definately. I've seen it myself. There's a small cafe a couple blocks from where I'm staying, run by a couple who has been married over fifty years after meeting in their last year of high school and they're the sweetest people I have ever met. If we could all be so lucky to find that one special person early on...
48. What do you believe makes a successful life?
Paying the price. Nothing happens on its own, and people need to realize this. Not everything works on the pizza delivery system; you can't expect to place an order and have it delivered to you... mind you, you still have to pay for the pizza, but that's not the point... What was the point anyways? I've confused myself.
49. How honest are you about your thoughts and feelings (i.e. do you hide your true self from others, and in what way)?
I usually try to keep in a good mood around people; feelings are contagious, and when someone smiles, it induces other smiles. I have slipped up on occasion; something triggers an emotional response and I can't help but show how I feel. I think I'm pretty honest about my emotions and thoughts, just as everyone else should be.
50. Do you have any biases or prejudices?
Anyone who does disgusts me... wait. I feel like I've just contradicted myself.
51. Is there anything you absolutely refuse to do under any circumstances? Why do you refuse to do it?
Other than take my clothes off and run around naked in public... [laughs] I have my values.
52. Who or what, if anything, would you die for (or otherwise go to extremes for)?
Any one of my friends. Myra, the members of the resistance group; anyone I've formed a connection with. I have problems with getting too attached to people, places and things.
Part 5: Relationships With Others
53. In general, how do you treat others (politely, rudely, by keeping them at a distance, etc.)? Does your treatment of them change depending on how well you know them, and if so, how?
I try to keep a smile and not judge upon the first glance - of course, there are some people I've seen who I try and follow with my eye as long as I can [laughs]. I've met some beautiful people who are truly ugly, and some not so pretty who have the most amazing personalities. I like to get to know people and hear about their lives - all those little things that make them different from the next person, or what connects them. I guess to stop beating around the bush and answer, I'd have to say that I treat them as if I would treat anyone else at first, then based on how they treat me, I can be very open or reserved.
54. Who is the most important person in your life, and why?
If Myra hadn't been there with me before, I would definately be a cold, bitter person and while not being any of those two is impossible after a similar experience as I went through, her kindness, courage and wisdom have made me realize that I can't give into negative emotions and let them win. There are so many reasons that I can't even begin to say why she is so important to me. I met and fell in love with her almost instantly. No, it's not the kind of boy-meets-girl kind of love, but more of a parental love; the need to protect physically and emotionally. I'm gay, remember?
55. Who is the person you respect the most, and why?
A couple months after my life, as I call it, began, I met a woman named Maikell. She looked like a rough kind of person; blonde hair cut extremely short, and dressed in an almost male fashion. Honestly, I thought she was a man when I first met her. Like Myra, she was an angel - literally - and had died in World War II, fighting for France on the front lines in Germany. Being a woman in a men's world must have been so strange that I can't even begin to imagine - difficult as well; I mean, what kind of testosterone-filled soldier would respect a woman of equal rank? For that alone, she has my respect, but then she gives her gas-mask to a German woman - who I found out not too long ago was my great grandmother. How's that for craziness? Anyways, there had been a gas bomb dropped, and my great gran was pregnant with my grandmother at the time and couldn't make it to a shelter before the bomb went off. I think you can pretty much piece together the rest.
56. Who are your friends? Do you have a best friend? Describe these people.
Like I said, I form a connection with everyone I've met. My general group of friends are the fun-lovers, the artists and the friendly people who will stop to chat in the street. When there's nothing to do, I sometimes just blindly scroll through my phone's contact list and talk to whoever I land on and those conversations can range from the thirty second "sorry I'm busy", to hours.
57. Do you have a spouse or significant other? If so, describe this person.
Nooooo, no. Not anymore.
58. Have you ever been in love? If so, describe what happened.
I had developped a crush - which later turned into a breif relationship - with my school friend, Aiden. He was sort of on the boarderline between popular and outcast and had been a very good friend since we were in elementary school. He had invited me to this one new year's party, which my parents surpirsingly let me attend (they trusted him immensely) and, of course, the only thing to drink was alcohol or water... or what I had been told was fruit punch. I had been wondering why everything had gotten fuzzy when Aiden was kind enough to inform me that it had been mixed with a good deal of vodka and that I should probably go home before my parents did to sleep the alcohol off. We were both drunk, so he left his car at the host's house and we walked home through the park where, in our happily drunken state, wound up getting a little intimate.
59. What do you look for in a potential lover?
Honesty is a big deal for me. Also, someone caring. I know I'm sort of going for the cookie-cutter "perfect" lover, but it's true. I want someone who will care for me and make me feel loved.
60. How close are you to your family?
We were extremely close to each other and the Christian community of Argon, the city where I grew up; we would always attend group functions, or, when it was just us, play board games on Fridays after homework had been completed. Dinner was a big deal for us as it was the one time of the day where everyone sat down to relax and eat. Everything was usually prepared by myself, my mother or both of us, and later, my sister, Analise helped peeling vegetables and little things like that.
61. Have you started your own family? If so, describe them. If not, do you want to? Why or why not?
I haven't started a family yet, and can't exactly do so. If I could, I definately would, but right now, I can't; too much going on. When things settle down I hope to find someone.
62. Who would you turn to if you were in desperate need of help?
The Teiko resistance group is a family; no member is ever alone, and so I can turn to any one of the 34 members for help.
63. Do you trust anyone to protect you? Who, and why?
I've come to rely on myself for protection, but when things get rough, like in a fight or a rescue operation at the lab, I feel safe knowing that someone has my back.
64. If you died or went missing, who would miss you?
I'd like to think everyone, but that wouldn't be true. The Teiko would miss me, and certainly Myra would.
65. Who is the person you despise the most, and why?
I can't say I really despise anyone, not even the lab staff. I mean, they had their reasons and families to provide for and couldn't afford to not do their job. I guess I would have to say whoever started the whole thing, but it's been around for so long, that I doubt it's what the original founder had in mind when he started.
66. Do you tend to argue with people, or avoid conflict?
I try to avoid it as much as possible, unless it is to stand up for a minority and only then if reasoning through words doesn't work.
67. Do you tend to take on leadership roles in social situations?
I sort of like to be my own person, neither leading or following. Sometimes, like with operations, I have to follow. No leadership roles yet as I've only been there maybe five or six months.
68. Do you like interacting with large groups of people? Why or why not?
I don't like huge groups... but at the same time, being on stage is thrilling. True, there are always the butterflies; being infront of a large group who have their eyes on you, watching and listening can be stressful, but at the end of the day, all they want is a good time, and I like to think that so far, I've delivered.
69. Do you care what others think of you?
I've come to terms with the fact that not everyone will like me, and not everyone will hate me. It's their choice what they do, and it's their gain or loss either way. It's nice to be thought of highly by someone, but it's impossible to be loved by everyone.
Part 6: Likes And Dislikes
70. What is/are your favorite hobbies and pastimes?
I'm really into the arts, be it drawing or writing. Reading has always been one of my favorite hobbies; I like to read fantasy, comedy, horror or suspense novels. As far as singing is concerned, I guess it's part hobby and part job; apparantly, I'm good at it, and writing lyrics is kind of like a theraputic experience, getting all the darkness out through pen and paper, spreading joy or invoking thought.
71. What is your most treasured possession?
My sketchbooks are definately my babies. I've filled about three in my life, and it has everything from crappy little 5am doodles to full drawings, comics, lyrics or diary entries.
72. What is your favorite color?
I like bright colours. Black accented with neon can be a lot of fun.
73. What is your favorite food?
I have a strange addiction to sushi, especially that salmon sashimi stuff... did I say that right? Mango sorbet should be a part of everyone's grocery list.
74. What, if anything, do you like to read?
I like to read novels, especially fantasy, horror, comedy or suspense. I also enjoy poetry like crazy; anything from Beowulf to the romantic poets and the Victorian age is a lot of fun. I wish I could write like that.
75. What is your idea of good entertainment (consider music, movies, art, etc.)?
For me, entertainment can be something as simple as talking on the phone or reading to going to a club and just losing myself on the dance floor.
76. Do you smoke, drink, or use drugs? If so, why? Do you want to quit?
I smoke and sometimes drink, but no drugs for me. I'm an alcoholic, so when I say to limit me to three drinks, I mean it; I don't stop until I pass out, get kicked out or have someone draw the line for me. I like to remember the fun I've had. Smoking isn't too bad; mostly when I'm feeling stressed, and even then, I don't always finish it.
77. How do you spend a typical Saturday night?
Sometimes, I relax in my apartment, maybe take a bath and bring a book in with me, or I'll play computer games - in particular, Neverwinter Nights. It's so much fun, and scarily addictive. Other times, I'll go out and see a movie or concert, or I'll go to a rave (minus the drugs. That stuff is horrible).
78. What makes you laugh?
Anything really. Someone will say something either deliberaly funny, or I'll catch a double-entendre and laugh either silently or out loud. There have been a few occasions where I've fallen into one of those tear-inducing laughter fits with friends but then everyone is laughing, so it's all good.
79. What, if anything, shocks or offends you?
How women are portrayed in the media and how young the audiance that kind of stuff is targeted at. I've seen fourteen-year-old girls in microskirts and tube tops making out with boys who look like they've come out of a bad rap movie, all because of the delusional messages passed on from these artists to young, impressionable girls. There's already enough pressure on them to be perfect in their own eyes without the feeling of obligation to perfection in the ogling eyes of men. I've also seen girls come into the club with fake IDs, looking skinnier than I am - and I'm fifteen pounds underweight for my height. Beauty doesn't come from large breasts, long legs, great hair, eyes and make-up; it's personality that girls who fall into this trap are lacking, and the guys don't help this matter at all. They're too busy thinking they'll get lucky, and the girls are so desperate to impress that they're easily swayed into the sexual scene before they graduate high school.
80. What would you do if you had insomnia and had to find something to do to amuse yourself?
Neverwinter Nights, or a good book. I have weird sleeping issues anyways, like sometimes, I'll stay up for a week at a time, then sort of die on the following Monday.
81. How do you deal with stress?
Light up a cigarette, open my book and start writing how I feel, or blogging. Sometimes, I'll go for a walk by myself. I'm kind of an emotional rollercoaster and shut myself away when I'm stressed or upset and things have happened that I'd rather not talk about, then wind up lapsing into a good "angst-a-palooza" as someone once called it. It must be obvious when I'm upset or when these things are about to happen, because people always tell me to talk to them. It's not easy, but I always wind up pouring my heart out to someone and feeling a lot better afterwards.
82. Are you spontaneous, or do you always need to have a plan?
I like to plan, but I can't stick to it word for word; my plans are more flexible... sometimes playdough-flexible and other times, the plans have more structure.
83. What are your pet peeves?
I'll just list them:
- How girls and women are objectified in the media.
- Rap and country music
- Dishonesty
- Prejudice
- Selfishness
and for some reason
- People who are late.
Part 7: Self Images And Etc.
84. Describe the routine of a normal day for you. How do you feel when this routine is disrupted?
It's usually wake up, get caffinated and showered, run some errands (ie: groceries, picking up medication, tidying the house, etc.), going to work, then coming back home, another shower, then do stuff to keep me occupied be it at home or not. There isn't really anything that can disrupt my routine; stuff happens, and I could freak out, but it really isn't that big of a deal. If it happens, it happens and I can't let one little thing throw everything out of whack.
85. What is your greatest strength as a person?
I guess it would have to be loyalty. If asked, I'll keep a secret, and there is no way you can get me to sell out.
86. What is your greatest weakness?
Getting emotional over things. I try to be cheerful, and usually am, but sometimes, I can't put that face on and sometimes, I find myself in a really bad position. Fortunately, I've always had people to pick me up and fix me; talk and listen to my problems and share the pain.
87. If you could change one thing about yourself, what would it be?
If I could, I'd maybe gain a little more weight, but my body's metabolism has pretty much slowed to the point where I can't anymore.
88. Are you generally introverted or extroverted?
I'll admit, I'm extremely shy, but the right thing will pop up and coax me out of my shell; someone who shares my interests or just says "hi" and asks me how I am.
89. Are you generally organized or messy?
My room is pretty clean unless you open the closet or look under my bed. [laughs] Please don't; opening my closet is like opening Pandora's box.
90. Name three things you consider yourself to be very good at, and three things you consider yourself to be very bad at.
I can draw, sing and write stuff, but if you want me to do any math past addition and subtraction, memorize dates without writing them down or talk to large groups of people (singing doesn't count), I'm useless.
91. Do you like yourself?
I don't hate myself, but there are certain things I do that bug me. I have a really bad habit of beating myself up over little things, or I can be very conscious of how I look, but at the end of the day, I can still look at myself in the mirror and say that I'm not too bad.
92. What are your reasons for being an adventurer (or doing the strange and heroic things that RPG characters do)? Are your real reasons for doing this different than the ones you tell people in public? (If so, detail both sets of reasons...)
The Teiko have given me what I am today, and for that, I want to help them whenever I can; deliveries, rescue missions, scouting... wow, I just realized how ninja-like that sounded! Awsome! [laughs] I tell people the truth, though, when they ask where I'm from and why I'm not there. I mean, I was a gay kid living in a Christian society and while it probably wouldn't have been as bad if it was Catholic, I was still afraid of what that would mean for my sister, so I left home to sort things out; get my head in order and start a new life for myself. They don't really need to know about what happened between then and now; for all they know, it never happened, and it's kind of a downer to hear about all that... it sucks to talk about it too.
93. What goal do you most want to accomplish in your lifetime?
Nothing really major. If something happens, it was supposed to happen, I guess. I mainly just want to be able to do something for someone.
94. Where do you see yourself in 5 years?
Five years older? I don't really like to make long-long term plans, but take things as they come.
95. If you could choose, how would you want to die?
I'm not really planning on dying, I mean, it would be kind of hard unless I was restrained in the middle of a sunny field, but if I did ever die, it would be doing something to help someone. Being able to die knowing that I had died so that someone could live would be amazing.
96. If you knew you were going to die in 24 hours, name three things you would do in the time you had left.
I would
a) Make sure Myra was well taken care of; the couple who works at my favorite cafe are unable to have children, and she often goes over there to help with the baking. I know they would take care of her.
b) Contact my parents and tell them what's happened and how things are going well.
c) Put on the show of my life! I mean, why not leave a good memory in peoples' minds? Go out with a bang!
97. What is the one thing for which you would most like to be remembered after your death?
I don't really care if I'm remembered or not. I'd like to be remembered as who I am as a person, not neccessarily what I've done.
98. What three words best describe your personality?
Patient, calm and artsy.
99. What three words would others probably use to describe you?
Quiet, friendly and I've had "pretty" thrown at me a couple times. It felt good.
100. If you could, what advice would you, the player, give to your character? (You might even want to speak as if he or she were sitting right here in front of you, and use proper tone so he or she might heed your advice...)
Got something to do? DOOOO EEEEET! >D
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