In a bad mood? come here and rant till you feel better

[TeaDidikai]

Calixti

Uh huh. Because, obviously, your experiences are universal. My twenty years with zero attraction to men and revulsion at the thought of shagging one means nothing if I actually haven't shagged a man, and "fully explored" my sexuality.

And of course your experiences are completely universal and everyone should just assume that no matter what, no one could ever actually change or express their sexuality any differently throughout their life.

I mean, parish the thought that it might be possible for anyone to think that someone, somewhere, might express their sexuality differently as they develop. We wouldn't want that impossible thought to offend you.

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Because random strangers who ask about whether or not I'm "really" a lesbian after I reject them are so obviously concerned about me, huh? Wow, I'm so grateful for your wisdom.

I'm sorry. Are you somehow under the impression that I was making a general statement about strangers even after I quoted someone who was talking about their sister and qualified the statement by saying "someone they care about". rolleyes  

[TeaDidikai]

When did people stop using context and attempting to understand motivations in specific situations?

For all the venom I have seen lately, online and in person, most of it has come from disenfranchised groups who can't tell the difference between actual hate- the people who have a deep seeded aversion to whatever they are expressing, and contextual situations wherein no hate is present, but the actions are similarly expressed and filtered through their personal issues.  

[Recursive Paradox]

Shearaha

A very good friend of mine is gay. When I first met him I asked him if he was sure. He is completly unlike any other gay man I have met. I knew before I actually met him that he was gay, but once I met him it was and still is sometimes hard to wrap my head around. Perhaps it's more of a not fitting with the perception of gay to that individual?

This is entirely possible. A lot of people equate a certain set of actions, behaviors and self expression with homosexuality (unfortunately) and when someone doesn't match those it can be a bit of ******** to find out that they're gay.

I'm fairly androgynous in expression, no doubt due to the fact that I've jumped from the guy social group to the girl social group and just decided to take whatever conventions I liked the most from both. So I actually get a lot of assumptions that I'm a lesbian and were I straight, that would be sort of annoying.

Calixti

It's not self-sabotage when she really is too old for me!

Bah! She is not too old for you. You can connect to her right? You both have comparable comprehension levels and shared interests? Why should age be an issue when you're both consenting adults?

Don't be afraid of happiness. Go for it. <3

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Possibly. Apparently, people perceive me as straight even when I'm not single. I'm starting to think my lack of gaydar interferes with other people's gaydars. emo

Well you've got a very feminine cutesy vibe. It's not what people expect in lesbians. So because you don't match these subconscious impressions, people might have a tough time internalizing the idea that you are a lesbian.

I mean, hell, you haven't really seen me in person since you moved, but my voice, body and face are really good now. Most people except some level of manliness in trans women. The fact that I don't have that anymore has caused queer folk, not just straight cisgender folk, to give me the googly eyes when I tell them I'm trans.

I had one person say, "are you sure...? o_O" And I looked down and said, "nope, the c**k is still there. Must not be a mistake after all." in a teasing tone. So I guess maybe you shouldn't take it quite as much as an indication of them being assholes who are delegitimizing you and more just people trying to wrap their minds around it.

Not to say it isn't rude or anything, but at least it isn't malicious right?  

[Fiddlers Green]

I've been told i was flirting, or being flirted with when I had no idea such a thing was happening.
I suppose I either seem stand offish and aloof or rather suggestive with little middle ground.

When I, at a party between mutual acquaintances, greeted a young lady in a manner I thought was friendly without being amorous, she immediately replied with: "I'm a lesbian."
Confused by this, and thinking she was setting the topic of conversation, I responded: "Ah, very good then, I'm without a gender preference."
She made a rolleyes at me and mutter some flippant comment about men.
This left me in a state of blink incomprehension for near to an hour, as the hostility level never dropped, even after I furnished her with a ride to her girlfriend's home. I wonder what must have been done to her, that she parted company that night with the the admonition that I would be getting neither grass nor cash, and especially not @$$, and that she would , how can I paraphrase... yes.
Perform amateur surgery upon my gender specific regions if I tried to touch her.

My point is, please be patient with misunderstandings. sweatdrop  

[Recursive Paradox]

Fiddlers Green

My point is, please be patient with misunderstandings. sweatdrop

Oh geez, that must have sucked.

I, as a rule, try to avoid being too reactionary when it comes to flirtation. If I think someone I'm not interested in is hitting on me (but in a relatively friendly and respectful fashion) then I'll continue the conversation, dropping hints that I am not available. This allows the pursuer to break off pursuit without losing face and doesn't require an argument or social conflict.

If the person doesn't catch the hint, I get a little cold and see if that works. If that doesn't work, I generally ask, "are... you hitting on me? Because I'm not available/not interested" which usually solves the issue by being direct.

If a person is disrespectful, sleezy or rude (and I do my best to account for culture shock) in their attempts to flirt, I go straight to the coldness, but really that's my reaction to anyone being rude or disrespectful in conversation, whether it involves compliments for my body and personality or not.

In the situation you described, I would have probably just dropped hints (that you prolly wouldn't have noticed or been confused by, since you weren't hitting on me). You probably would have gotten very confused at me clicking into aloof and cold mood for a minute or two and I would have spotted the confusion and finally went to direct questioning.

And after you clarified, I would have gotten 100% friendly and fun again. 3nodding  

[Violet Song jat Shariff]

Honestly?? Who makes a size XL sundress that only accommodates an A-cup boob?? gonk .

I hate clothes shopping. I felt skinny. Now I want to go lob off hunks of fat with our chef knife emo .


EDIT: Also, Great Tits for Poe.  

[Recursive Paradox]

Violet Song jat Shariff

Honestly?? Who makes a size XL sundress that only accommodates an A-cup boob?? gonk .

o_O Are you looking for one?

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EDIT: Also, Great Tits for Poe.

Hehehe, those are great tits. *chirp chirp*  

[Violet Song jat Shariff]

Recursive Paradox

Violet Song jat Shariff

Honestly?? Who makes a size XL sundress that only accommodates an A-cup boob?? gonk .

o_O Are you looking for one?

No...I saw a cute sundress the other day and when I went to go try it on...well, my cups runneth over. A LOT. I have B's-going-on-C's. And I was sad because it was a really cute dress emo .

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EDIT: Also, Great Tits for Poe.

Hehehe, those are great tits. *chirp chirp*

wink  

[Nines19]

I understand that some people don't like Obama. I understand that they voted for McCain. I even understand that some of them believe everything they hear on Fox News.

I don't understand how they can talk about Obama's former Reverend and then in the next breath talk about how Obama's a Muslim because his middle name is Hussein.

For one, my middle name is Alexis. Does that mean I'm a Hellenic Reconstructionist? Nope. So how does Hussein a Muslim make? (I get the negative connotation, but not how it makes him Muslim.)

The second point about this that irks me is the logic surrounding the entire deal. He went to church. A Protestant church. For, as they will remind us how long Rev. Wright preached to him, 20 years.
Now I'm not one to judge (out loud), but that's a damn long time for a Muslim to be practicing the Christian faith!

Note: This is not about politics. It's about stupidity.  

[Recursive Paradox]

Violet Song jat Shariff

Recursive Paradox

Violet Song jat Shariff

Honestly?? Who makes a size XL sundress that only accommodates an A-cup boob?? gonk .

o_O Are you looking for one?

No...I saw a cute sundress the other day and when I went to go try it on...well, my cups runneth over. A LOT. I have B's-going-on-C's. And I was sad because it was a really cute dress emo .

That's a bit odd. o_O You'd expect an XL size to go a little larger in the cups on average.  

[Maze]

Stupid sunlight.

*grumbles and hides*

Stupid people commenting on my purty umbrella. If I didn't ******** need it I wouldn't ******** hide under it. D<

I really dislike being sensitive to sunlight in combination with temperatures other people don't call 'excessive heat'. :C  

[Recursive Paradox]

IT WOULD BE ******** NICE FOR PEOPLE TO ******** LEARN HOW TO DRIVE SAFELY IN THE RAIN. That way I could avoid having two near death experiences in one afternoon because people are ******** idiots and need to die in a fire.  

[Collowrath]

I don't know how much longer I can keep my patience with a certain M&R member. I haven't responded to her, but her level of BAAW and willful ignorance is grating on my nerves. Her lack of respect for other members of the forum and her constant "I don't accept your evidence because it challenges my preconceived notions" attitude is really... frustrating. To say the least.

I'm going to refrain from the more tactless remarks that were running through my head.  

[patch99329]

Manners cost nothing.
It annoys me rather alot to see people 'correcting' those that do not know better in the manner that they do. I'm not talking about the willfully ignorant here, but those who have been genuinely misinformed and show an obvious desire to learn.
Instead of politely correcting them, or even challenging them. People are addressed in a way that comes across as hostile or mocking. God forbid that somebody may take offense at that.

Correct, don't ******** belittle.  

[Ashley the Bee]

Recursive Paradox

IT WOULD BE ******** NICE FOR PEOPLE TO ******** LEARN HOW TO DRIVE SAFELY IN THE RAIN. That way I could avoid having two near death experiences in one afternoon because people are ******** idiots and need to die in a fire.

! =(

*comfort*