General Harry Potter RPG

[Ex-Professor Remus Lupin]

(Aww, you ruined my reply with your edits, HK. Ah well.)

"I know you have, Sirius, and I learned my own lessons. I've been stabbed in the back too many times to find trust so easily," Remus said slowly. "I don't like being lied to, even over trivial things likes this thing with Kathryn. It isn't a big deal, you know, she's a teenager and she can handle herself well enough."

He sighed, "This isn't about Kathryn, okay; this is about being honest with each other about everything, even the menial things and whether or not we can trust each other to do that, but - I don't know right now."  

[Sirius Black-Snuffles]

"How can we trust each other when everytime something goes wrong we're going to fear that the other one will drag something up from the past?" Sirius hissed.

"I'm just waiting for the day when you bring up the Incident again and throw it in my face. Even though we promised we wouldn't." Sirius stood up and turned towards the bed post, resting his head against the cool wood.

"I can only remember the big things, and all of the bad stuff Remus. I'm still slowly getting back my good memories from Azkaban. Everytime I do something wrong or screw up even slightly I remember everything that could be related to it and thrown in my face. And that scares me, because I don't know what will set you off any more." He turned and looked at Remus.

"And then you know, maybe if you didn't say how I lied about important things then, we would've gotten over the whole I lied to you about Kathryn part because you made it seem important that no student should see us in the throes of almighty passion! And we would be making stupid promises of no more lies except for the 'I promise you, you don't look fat in that Moony' type! And the 'We're going to this place' when really we're going to a suprise party type of lies!" Sirius started pacing back and forth trying to control himself and to get the warring voices out of his mind.

"If everything I'm going to be reminded about from my past is going to be things I did wrong, or things that went wrong, then I have to wonder why I even bothered coming back. Why did I do it? Harry survived to 17 without me, and as much as I hate to admit it, he can continue surviving, I was never that important in his life. And you..." Sirius stopped and stared at the wall ahead of him.

"Maybe I thought you needed me, as much as I remembered needing you, and as much as I feel like I need you now. But you can't trust me, and you obviously have things you would like to talk about, but you won't talk to me. And you bring up things that I've been fighting to cover with new memories and old good memories...Was I wrong when they asked me why I was fighting to get back to life Remus? Have you ever really needed me? Would you have gone on fine, as Harry has, without me?"  

[Ex-Professor Remus Lupin]

Remus sighed, "Sirius, I'm not an open person. But, I told you before that it killed me just a little more everyday that you weren't here. You were just my friend back then, now you're more and..."

He trailed off into silence, looking at Sirius' back for a moment before he spoke. "...I can't live without you, Sirius. I know it's selfish to tell you this. You shouldn't feel obligated to stay, and I'm not asking you to."  

[Sirius Black-Snuffles]

"You honestly think I want to leave you Remus?" Sirius asked turning back to him. He shook his head.

"When I defeated death literally just so I could get back, why would I want to leave Remus? I just..." he stopped and choked on his words. He looked down and away.

"It's stupid, but I want to forget everything that happened before, and I know it's impossible, especially if I want to stay near you and the rest of the Wizarding world. I can't do that though Remus, and it's hard for me to grasp what's real and what isn't sometimes. Do you really want to be with me knowing that?"  

[Ex-Professor Remus Lupin]

Watching the conflicting emotions on Sirius' face, Remus tried to put his own jumbled thoughts in order. He sighed and retrieved his shirt from the floor, shrugging it on as he stood up, buttoning it before finally crossing the room.

"I would want to be with you even if you didn't want to be with me. I love you," he closed his eyes for a moment, "and I'm real."

Taking Sirius' hand in his own, he pressed Sirius' fingertips to his throat over the pulse, knowing that it was beating rapidly as his heart pounded. "How else can I convince you of that?" he asked, swallowing, his throat tight with emotion.  

[Sirius Black-Snuffles]

Unwanted tears streamed down Sirius' face as he felt the pulse underneath his finger tips.

"How else can I convince you of that?" He shook his head.

"I know you're real," he whispered before pulling Remus into an embrace.

"No more lying about anything that isn't a surprise party," he whispered quietly resting his head on Remus' shoulder. Soaking the man's shirt with his tears.


((should be on later tonight Rem, not sure yet))  

[Ex-Professor Remus Lupin]

Putting his arms around Sirius' waist, Remus pulled the other man closer. His eyes were stinging and he was sure in a minute if he didn't pull himself together he was going to - cry. So much for not crying.

"I'm sorry for being an arse," he said softly. "I don't want to make you cry anymore."

(Gah...that's a bad post...but whatever, it's close to what I wanted and I got to say arse. Arse. Arse Arse. Okay, that's my new favorite word.)  

[Sirius Black-Snuffles]

"Me? I don't cry..." Sirius muttered, as he pulled back slightly to wipe his eyes.He sighed and shook his head before putting his arms back around Remus.

"And it's not you really. It's..." he stopped and closed his eyes taking a deep breath and resting his forehead on Remus'. He opened his eyes and gently wiped one of Remus' tears away with his thumb.

"I...I love you Remus. And I will no matter how many times we fight, lie, scream, kick, bite, punch, disown, and other general bad things. But just like I promised you no more lies, can you promise me that you won't throw all the stupid mistakes I made back in all those other past lives at my face when I screw up again? It hurts me to think that I'm not the only one who can only remember the bad times with a few random good times with fuzzy details thrown into the mix. And all anybody talks about is the war and the horrible events leading up to and during it." He traced Remus' face absently with his thumb, smiling, lost in his own thoughts as memories slowly trickled in.


(what happened to bemuse? Arse is a fun word, but bleedingly is better *ducks and runs for cover*)  

[Mint Thimble]

((Sorry for not posting much lately... really only getting on in the snippets when I'm at my friends because my dad took the laptop with him to Miami. ;_;
And speaking of words, my current fave is bifercate. =P))
Luna turned her back on Malfoy. SHe would NOT hear an insult about her father. He back was straight and chin held high, perfect psture, in other words proud. She wouldn't hear anyone insultion her family. She took a bisquit from the table, buttered it and began to nibble.
(( gonk Please don't kill me... I have no idea how it would look for Luna to be mad, so I thought she might ignore it... >.>;; ))  

[Orgazmic Coffdrop]

(I truly don't mind, I've enjoyed reading HK and Ex Prof Remus. Wooo! Sorry if you don't like initials sweatdrop )
Draco's pride swelled, if possible, to a greater height at her reaction. Now, most people who are 'bullies' would feel threatened by this. But he could just see the anger seeping from her eyes into her surroundings and knew his job was done, well not quite actually.
He was rather bored, to say the least. He needed something to do. So he decided to pick on her a little more. "You eat like a bloody rat, Loony." he spat, giving a smirk.  

[Decadent Delirium]

Gabriel stood for a moment, before shaking his head. Maybe he would meet people in the Great Hall, he thought to himself as he ambled over to the large doors that marked the entrance to said hall.

Besides, he thought as he pushed the doors open, the journey to the castle had been rather long and he was hungry.

((sorry for the short post. I'm still trying to figure out how to insert my character...))  

[Ex-Professor Remus Lupin]

Remus nodded. "Sirius, I swear," he said softly. "No more talking about the bad times and I'll help you remember everything good, okay."

(I had to steal Ennis' quote from Brokeback. Though with the name changed. Sorry about the short post. I've been busy with getting all my stuff together.)  

[Sirius Black-Snuffles]

((This Post Contains Important Information Regarding How Fast We're Moving))

Sirius nodded and smiled kissing Remus' forehead.

"Enough of this. It's about 4 in the afternoon. Dinner is at 6, curfew 9. Let's get out of here and go do something to kill the time."

"I do believe I made a promise earlier that I'd do anything you want me to do--within reason of course. You might actually be able to get me into the big musty room and 'read' one of those...things...you know, with the pages?" he teased.


((Quite all right Rem, we've given them their entertainment, now they get to catch up. Hope everything goes smoothly))  

[Mint Thimble]

Luna turned around and for the first time in several years, her temper snapped. She got up from the table and hurled the peice of bread at Malfoy before turning on her heal to walk, chin held high, in what would have been a dignified mannor if she hadn't run into someone just outside of the Great Hall. ((Which shall be Gabriel, no? Yay for finding away to include peopl! xD))  

[Orgazmic Coffdrop]

(indeed)
Malfoy dodged the bread, but it skimmed his hair. He hurried and smoothed it out to a perfection his father would be proud of. He leaned forward in his seat and scanned his nails of the imaginitive dirt under them. He exasperated a sigh. Sometimes being perfect was tedious and dull. Maybe he would, just for one day, decide to not take 2 hours to do his hair in the morning. Maybe, only maybe. For now, he made sure he was in tip top form before grabbing a biscut and eating it in good, manly portions.