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 Posted: Sat Feb 14, 2009 2:42 pm
???????????????
????????????????????????
???????????????????????????
???????????????????????????????????
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Posted: Sun Feb 15, 2009 10:59 am
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Posted: Wed Feb 18, 2009 6:25 pm
90's were good to me!!!
lolollololololololololololol rofl
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Posted: Sun Feb 22, 2009 4:50 pm
me vote it kool you cool the 90s rock even though it kinda wierd but i think it cool
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Posted: Sun Feb 22, 2009 8:09 pm
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Posted: Wed Feb 25, 2009 7:08 pm
ive seen the ambercrombie thing before
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Posted: Wed Feb 25, 2009 7:45 pm
Gandhi was a strange man. He walked barefoot, so his feet were calloused. He ate very little, so he was fragile. When he did eat, his diet was odd, giving him bad breath. Gandhi was a super calloused fragile mystic hexed by halitosis.
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Posted: Sat Feb 28, 2009 2:15 pm
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Posted: Mon Mar 02, 2009 7:35 pm
This old lady goes into a pet store.
Employee: Hi madam'e how can i help u today?
Old lady: Oh..hi! i was just looking for a pet to keep me company at my old age
Employee: so what are u thinking? I would say a dog! Dogs are responsible loving pets that will stand by u forever!
Old Lady: Nah im allergic to dogs
Employee: uh...A CAT?!?! It'll sit on ur lap on those lonely long days
Old Lady: im afraid it'll scratch my eyes out in the middle of the night!!
Employee: okay...what about...a...BIRD!!! It'll sing its heart out to u every single day! don't u think thats nice? and they're easy to take care of too!
Old Lady: ive never thought about it but i'll give it a try. ^_^
She buys a cute little parakeet and cage and takes them home. The next day she goes back and says...
Old Lady: i put the bird in the cage and waited for it to sing...but nothing happened not even a little squeek out of that small little thing!
Employee: oh really? Maybe u should get it a ladder so it can climb up and sing its song at the top.
She gets the ladder and places it in the cage. The next day she goes back
Old lady: hes still not singing to me! i feel so lonely.
Employee:..hmm what about u put a little mirror at the top, see it'll climb up the ladder and look at its self and say "what a pretty bird" maybe it can't sing and its a talking kind of birdie! ^_^ isn't that great!
So she gets the mirror and places it in the cage the next day...
Old lady: HE STILL DIDN'T SING!!! OR TALK!!! '
Employee: calm down he probably will soon what about u get it a bell so when it climbs the ladder and looks in the mirror it can ring the bell and try to mimick the sond?
Old lady: okay i'll try. "She says gloomly as she walks out of the store"
So the old lady gets all the items and goes home. The next day she comes into the store balling her eyes out.
Employee: no luck eh? don't cry madam'e he'll sing to u soon like i said probably needs to warm up to u
As she cries she lets out her words
Old lady: he...DIEEEDD!!...and i don't know why or how or what happened to cause this..i did everything u told me to do but he never said a thing...oh wait...he did say two words but it didn't make sense...he said..."NEEEDD FOOOODD" then he died...
(long eh? its funneh sorta... ._. GAH! ^^)
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Posted: Mon Mar 02, 2009 7:54 pm
(no offense blonds ^_^ but this is pretty good i guess and once again i have long jokes >.<)
A Blonde Goes On Who Wants To Be A Millionaire
Regis: "Barbara, you've done very well so far - $500,000 and one lifeline left -- phone a friend.
The next question will give you the top prize of One Million dollars if you get it right ... but if you get it wrong you will drop back to $32,000 -- are you ready?"
Barbara: "Sure, I'll have a go!"
Regis: "Which of the following birds does not build it's own nest?
Is it........
A-Robin
B-Sparrow
C-Cuckoo
D-Thrush
Remember Barbara its worth 1 Million dollars."
"I think I know who it..but I'm not 100%...
No, I haven't got a clue. I'd like to phone a friend Regis, just to be sure.
Regis: "Yes, who, Barbara, do you want to phone?
Barbara: "I'll phone my friend Maggie back home in Birmingham."
(ringing)
Maggie (also a blonde): "Hello..."
Regis: "Hello Maggie, its Regis here from Who Wants to be a Millionaire-I have Barbara here and she is doing really well on $500,000, but needs your help to be a Million.
The next voice you hear will be Barbara's and she'll read you the question.
There are 4 possible answers and 1 correct answer and you have 30 seconds to answer -- fire away Barbara."
Barbara: "Maggie, which of the following birds does not build it's own nest? Is it:
A-Robin
B-Sparrow
C-Cuckoo
D-Thrush"
Maggie: "Oh Gees, Barbara that's simple.....It's a Cuckoo."
Barbara: "You think?"
Maggie: "I'm sure."
Barbara: " Thanks Maggie." (hangs up)
Regis: "Well, do you want to stick on $500,000 or play on for the Million, Barbara?"
Barbara: "I want to play, I'll go with C-Cuckoo"
Regis: "Is that your final answer?"
Barbara: "It is."
Regis: "Are you confident?"
Barbara: "Yes fairly, Maggie's a sound bet."
Regis: "Barbara.....you had $500,000 and you said C-Cuckoo ...you're right! - You have just won ONE MILLION DOLLARS.
Here is your check. You have been a great contestant and a real gambler. Audience please put your hands together for Barbara."
(clapping)
That night Barbara calls round to Maggie and brings her down to a local bar for a celebration drink and, as they are sipping their Champagne, Barbara turns to Maggie and asks "Tell me Maggie, How in God's name did you know that it was the Cuckoo that does not build its own nest?
Maggie: "Listen Barbara, everybody knows that a Cuckoo lives in a clock."
EXXTTTRAAASS!!!! (im just good at dumb blond jokes! ^^)
I knew a blonde that was so stupid that.......
* she called me to get my phone number.
* she spent 20 minutes looking at the orange juice box because it said "concentrate."
* she put lipstick on her forehead because she wanted to make up her mind.
*she tried to put M&M's in alphabetical order.
*she sent me a fax with a stamp on it.
*she tried to drown a fish.
*she thought a quarterback was a refund.
*she got locked in a grocery store and starved to death.
*she tripped over a cordless phone.
*she took a ruler to bed to see how long she slept.
*she asked for a price check at the Dollar Store.
*she studied for a blood test.
*she thought Meow Mix was a CD for cats.
*when she heard that 90% of all crimes occur around the home, she moved.
*when she missed the 44 bus, she took the 22 bus twice instead.
*when she took you to the airport and saw a sign that said "Airport Left" she turned around and went home
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Posted: Wed Mar 11, 2009 6:28 pm
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Posted: Sat Mar 28, 2009 4:24 am
rofl rofl rofl
there all great! lol! blaugh
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Posted: Sat Apr 04, 2009 4:30 pm
i dont voted 4 any1 cuz all the jokes wer super funny and here go sum of me:
A englishman,a black man and a mexican wer on a trip in a plane tht fall.
They wr lost in an island whe a indian tribe came and said:
U need to gather 50 types of the same food and bring it or wil kil u!
The mexican brought 50 coconuts.
-Now put them up ur butt without laughing!
The mexican was gonna put the 1st but the coconut but he laugh and he was was kiled.
The englishman brougt 50 redberys and the indian told him the same...
he was in the 49th wen he began 2 lagh ad waz kild.
They wer both in sky and the englishman asked the mexican:
-why hav u laugh?
-cuz the cocunut hair made me laugh!And u?
-cuz i saw the black guy apear with 50 watermelons!
biggrin smile 3nodding
Three blond women where lost in island.
One day they found a magic lamp,they rubbed it, and from it appeared a genie that said:
-I will grant you 3 wishes,one for each.
The first blond said:
-I want to be smart!
Then her hair turned brown and she started swimming to the continent.
She was half way done when a wave came and drowned her.
The second blond said:
-I want to be smarter than her!
Her hair turned black and she built a canoe.
Crossing the sea she was almost there when a big wave came and drowned her too.
The third blond said:
-I want to be smarter than them both.
Then she turned into a man and used the bridge to cross the sea to the continent.
blaugh whee lol
A man to his friend:
-I was two days in my car and only got out today.
-How did you got out?-his friend asked
-Opening the door...
razz rofl dramallama
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Posted: Wed Apr 15, 2009 4:25 am
i like this one:
bushes economic plan had 90% of people giving him a thumps up, the other 10%
gave him the other finger.
LOL rofl
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The_One_Man_Drumming_Band
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Posted: Wed May 06, 2009 6:25 pm
I gotsa joke! xDD
So a boy walks up to his grandmother and says, "Grandmother have you seen my pills. The bottle is labeled LSD."
And the grandmother responded by saying, "F**k the pills, have you seen the dragon in the kitchen?!?!"
HAHA I love it! Lol!
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