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Posted: Fri Jan 14, 2011 10:54 am
Granted, but this new found understanding leads to an obsession as you spend all day every day writing in your notepad and become a miserable shut-in.
I wish my foot wasn't asleep right now.
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Posted: Sat Jan 15, 2011 10:39 am
Granted, I slip on some shoes on you that make it to where you can't stop walking so that your feet will never fall asleep again
I wish I could have slept in today.
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Posted: Sat Jan 15, 2011 7:31 pm
Granted, you got fired from your job so you can sleep in every day now.
I wish I had magic powers.
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Posted: Sun Jan 16, 2011 6:58 pm
Granted but you end up destroying half the world bc you couldn't control them.
I wish my nose wasn't so stuffy and ickky stressed
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Posted: Mon Jan 17, 2011 8:43 am
Granted. Like Michael Jackson, you no longer have a real nose at all.
I wish I were a fish.
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Posted: Mon Jan 17, 2011 8:19 pm
((Ouch! That was a good one! rofl ))
Granted, you have become Clause from American Dad!
I wish there was something nummy to eat....
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Posted: Tue Jan 18, 2011 5:24 am
Granted. You get all the chocolate pies you can eat and you soon become obsessed and fat.
I wish for peace on earth.
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Posted: Wed Jan 19, 2011 5:35 pm
Granted, all humanity are brainwashed into obeying our new robot overlords, who put us to work in the coal mines 18 hours a day instead of letting us fight each other.
I wish I had a pet monkey.
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Posted: Thu Jan 27, 2011 3:34 pm
Granted! You have a sweet little capuchin named Capuchin. He is trained to pick pockets, fondle women, steal watches and find illegal drugs. He is not trained to poop in convenient places at convenient times. Unfortunately, he poops whenever he is excited or uncomfortable or comfortable and seems to confuse your bedroom for the toilet. Your house soon is filled with stolen watches, drugs and things people kept in their pockets. Oh and angry women. Oh and local police, FBI and DEA officers asking you if this is YOUR monkey. The monkey poop in your bedroom is all the evidence they need really.
I wish the happiest birthday ever for the person below me.
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Posted: Thu Jan 27, 2011 5:37 pm
It's not my birthday, but has a wonderful day anyway, but snubs you. Not even a thank you. Just a look away and a hmmph as he passes by.
Wish for robot to fetch my diet mountain dew for me.
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Posted: Thu Jan 27, 2011 7:41 pm
Granted, but after delivering your soda a red light goes on in the robot's chest and it takes you prisoner "for your own protection".
I wish I had another bottle of this delicious chocolate wine.
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Posted: Sat Feb 05, 2011 6:15 pm
Granted. Unfortunately the cork splits while trying to open it, forcing you to push the remaining cork in to the bottle. Your delicious apéritif is marred by little bits of floating cork.
I wish I had a nice little cottage in the country side.
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Posted: Sat Feb 05, 2011 7:11 pm
Granted, but there is a mix-up at the rental agency and you end up having to spend the entire summer sharing it with a family of 8.
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Posted: Tue Mar 22, 2011 12:10 pm
I wish Volvy had remembered to make a wish...
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Posted: Mon Apr 11, 2011 2:07 pm
Granted but its so fiendishly water tight against corruption that you get a severe migraine trying to think of some witty way to do so.
I wish I found my job easy again, like I used to.
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