Possession:You belong to me

[Christine Alina]

Sondra said,"And why should I thank you since your man handling me. which makes you no better than a human"Hissing at him, and mumbling thank you, she thought"pompous a**"and replied"If that will be all then get your hands off of me"harshly. Liked it or not, Sondra had no choice but to try put up with this man. Which she'll have to try to avoid him as much as possibly during her chores.

 

[wolvesofmibu666]

((You mean man handling, not man handily. You also mean "which makes you no better than a human". In your second sentence you have to express a subject. You never referred to Sondra, so you have to say "Hissing at him, and mumbling thank you, she thought" the "she" in that sentence tells the reader who all those actions are done by. Furthermore, you meant "pompous a**" I'm guessing you've heard that before, but don't know what it means. "pump less a**" would be an a** that is lacking a pump, which is something that you use to blow up balls. Pompous means, that the person assumes an unjustified highness of status. Please fix these things and pay closer attention. I've given you a lot of tips but you make the same mistakes over and over))  

[Christine Alina]

(Sorry I go and fix it right now)  

[wolvesofmibu666]

Mars raise a lip and huffed. "Good girl" he said, giving her a light little smack, not intended to hurt but to demean. "Now, you'll find a tall wooden cabinet beyond that door, that has everything you'll need to clean on a daily basis, start with this room we're in right now" he demanded, nodding toward the door. "After you're finished with this room, we'll see just what you can cook, of course, I won't be eating it, but I do often have guests, upon which occasions you will be occupying my side and behaving yourself"  

[Christine Alina]

Sondra stomped her way to the wooden cabinet yucking it open, and grabbing the cleaning the supplies. As she started dusting off everything in the room, and an hour later Sondra was on her hands and knees. Scrubbing the wooden dark cherry wood floors. As a vein popped on the left side of on head in her thought"Son of a b***h, spoil b*****d mother ********. I hope one that someone will kick his sorry a** to kingdom come!" scrubbing the floors furiously in anger.

 

[wolvesofmibu666]

((I never said he left. That post was somewhat better than most of your others, getting better but still lots of room to improve))

Mars stood patiently over her, looking down as she worked. As he was a vampire, she would find very little dust in the house, seeing as how dust was mostly dead skin. Furthermore, vampires were very pristine creatures and so the floor too was nigh immaculate. However, he did still want everything to be perfect about it after all. "Excellent dear" he said, his hands behind his head. "Now, now, don't you go on hating me, don't you go on in spite, it was your parents who sold your freedom away" he said. "Money, apparently was a lot more important than their daughter, for all they know you could be dead" he said gently, as though reciting a short poem. "I'm going to treat you a lot better than they ever did, and I am teaching you your place after all, a lesson you should be glad for"  

[Christine Alina]

(I fixed the post. I should get a book of thesaurus so that may I can use better words for role plays, and writing my fanfic.)

Sondra ignored him as she was finally finished cleaning the floors, and the room. That was perfectly spotless which maybe took hours to clean the room. She stood up and said, "I finished cleaning the room. So is there anything us that needs to be done?" snaring at him while she crossed her arms, and glared. If this guy wasn't please then she was going to be pissed off.

 

[Luca x Sanrau]

Back at home, talon had stashed away the rest of the cash she had just received, after having turned over poorly handled man and set to work on bandaging her poorly healing body. "I knew I should have just laid there..." slowly she brought the wrap around to the front of her, and pulled at it lightly, "would have saved my self the trouble of doing this, if I had just played dead" talon thought with a sigh. She took a few more wraps around her torso, before cutting the bandage, tucking and taping it off. Eyes closed, she let her hands drop and threw head back, in relief "I can finally sleep..." she thought, feeling the wind from the open window brush against her,"I'll go back after a quick nap..." she yawned "...I'm sure mister 'peaceful' can wait till then."Talon smiled halfheartedly, as she eased down onto her bed to sleep. It was good to have something to laugh about, before the nightmares came.

((lol, cute pic. sondra whee ))  

[wolvesofmibu666]

Mars shrugged. She was alright. Naturally his superhuman eyes could see flaws in the strokes she'd used to clean the floor and the table had a little too much of a sheen from dusting. "Good work then girl" he said wearily. "Of course, there are dozens of other rooms in the house to clean, but you will be cleaning only a few of them each day, go on and clean the bathroom you just used, make that one sparkle dear" he said a bit nastily, patting her shoulder. "Afterwards you'll have to make yourself dinner, there are a few foodstuffs in the kitchen, and meanwhile I'll see where you might sleep tonight, as well as if there is anything I can get for you to wear everyday as well as when you are playing my eye candy"  

[Christine Alina]

Sondra growled under her breath and stomped to the bathroom as she slammed the door hard, making a loud bump. As she begin cleaning the bedroom. She was very pissed off but, saying in her thoughts muttering to herself"Eye candy my a**, as if he-" But Sondra begin coughing, throwing her hands up to cover her mouth, and once she done coughing, she uncovered her mouth. She almost forgotten that she was sick, and was getting worse, but no matter, she will finish cleaning first.

Five minutes later Sondra was done cleaning the bathroom, and was heading towards the door, an till she felt very dizzy as everything begin spinning and, she collapse to the bathroom floor, with a loud thump.

 

[wolvesofmibu666]

((Coughing, not couching, that is a hard one, but remember it because you may be writing it again. Also, after "in her thoughts" you have to put an action, because you never tell us what is going on there. Perhaps you might say "in her thoughts she she was muttering to herself" or "in her thoughts she was saying" and then what she was thinking. You see, in her thoughts is the place, but we don't know what the action is yet))

Mars was insulted by her standoffish behavior, but she seemed to be good at cleaning and thus he decided to let her alone. He didn't want to kill her, at least not yet, she was a fairly valued asset. However, she was very annoying. All she'd done was moan and complain and seem useless since being in the house. The only useful thing she'd done was clean the sitting room, and even that had taken her so long.

He was upstairs in one of the less used bedrooms. It was pretty dusty and had a bit of old filth in it, but it was old and Victorian, it would suit most girls and had a large bed as well as a dresser with a mirror. He supposed she deserved this for now. She'd not have anything nice for dinner though, perhaps a few scraps of cheese and crackers or meat.

Holding a maid outfit at arm's length, he nodded, setting it on the bed. If she didn't like it, well it was too bad for her. Other than her nightshirt it would be the only clothing he'd give her yet.  

[Christine Alina]

(Ah...man I'll go fix that right now)  

[wolvesofmibu666]

((You still forgot to fix couching, and I will be needing a reply to my post in the actual RP))  

[Christine Alina]

As Sondra laid past out on the cold black marble bathroom floor. She dreamed once again about her memory's of the red headed stranger laughing, and playing together an till the sun set to dusk. But during at night Sondra will sleep while the red head man would set across from her bed, telling her wonderful stories, an till she fallen asleep. Before leaving He would always kiss her on the forehead, and whisper to Sondra good night.

 

[wolvesofmibu666]

Mars eventually left the room in which she would be staying, descending the stairs and looking into the bathroom. He sighed. Damn this girl was useless. She was almost more work than she was worth. Sick, unconscious, a brat. What else could she do to annoy him? He nudged her with his foot and rolled her over onto her back. Forcing his way into her mind, he broke her dream sequence and forced cogent thought into her mind, trying to jolt her awake. He wasn't moving her sorry a**, and so he was kind enough to try to wake her up, because if she didn't wake, she was spending the night on the bathroom floor in her cleaning clothes