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| Is Ranting a good stress reliever? |
| The best! |
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25% |
[ 12 ] |
| I think Art is a better outlet |
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18% |
[ 9 ] |
| Stress??? WHAT STRESS??? *twitch twitch* |
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56% |
[ 27 ] |
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| Total Votes : 48 |
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 Posted: Sun May 13, 2007 1:58 pm
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Posted: Tue May 15, 2007 1:18 pm
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Posted: Thu May 24, 2007 2:38 pm
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Posted: Tue Jun 05, 2007 7:23 pm
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Oh jeez...
Okay, Last friday through sunday I went to this thing called A-Kon, short for 'Anime Convention', and it's basically a haven for nerds like me who are obsessed with anime. Anyway, I went with two of my friends, Cassie and Justine, and my other friend, Michelle, came with her little group. The entire weekend was one from hell, to make a long story short. Justine, Cassie and I stayed in a hotel room together and that just about made me ballistic. Cassie is 18, Justine is six (17 in July) and I'm 16, the entire time, they bugged me almost to the point of insanity. Cassie has a nasty habit of touching peoples elbows ever so lightly with her fingertips, and constantly for three days she did that to me. Constantly. I know she's supposed to be my friend, but I swear all i wanted to do was punch her in the face.
Enough about A-kon now. Let's get on to what happened Monday night.
Y'see, My World History teacher, Mr. Wood? He failed me for the second semester with a ******** 66. Now, wherever you guys may live, a 66 may just be a D+. Oh, not in Texas, oh no. The lowest passiong grade you can get it s 70. Anything lower = fail. So when my mother saw my report card sunday night, she went crazy and marched my a** up to the school promptly at 8 AM. I usually sleep until 10 or 11 over the summer, so i didn't take my early summer morning too graciously. i was pissed; why the hell couldn't she wait 'till later? And not only that, the night before she gave me this fifteen minute long speech on how, "getting these grades are not good on your record" and "how do you expect to do anything in life with a grade like this?" and "i don't know whats gotten into you lately,you used to be such a good kid, you used to love school", which really put me in a bad mood that carried over to the next day.
i was in a really bitchy mood, and my mother isnt one for people who are anything but happy. she's the only one that can have emotions, apparently. so when i was in my pissy mood, she was all, "what the hell is your problem, rachael? stop acting like you're the one at a loss; i'm the one who has to pay for this s**t." of course, she didn't swear, oh no. She's a Jehova Witness. They don't swear. Anyway, that just put me in an even worse mood, and after she signed me up for summer school, she took my ******** iPod! It's like my soul and she took it away! she said that i was being disrespectful and immature and havine an iPod is a privledge and blah blah blah brussel sprouts. buiishit. I was the one who paid for that tourquise piece of metal, I was the one who begged my friend to put some music on it, i was the one who figured out how to work it, NOT her. even if she is my parent and supoporter, that iPod wasnt hers to begin with!
/sigh/ i dunno. maybe i'm just being spoiled. again. i dunno.
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Posted: Wed Jun 06, 2007 2:18 pm
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Bakurish Oh jeez... Okay, Last friday through sunday I went to this thing called A-Kon, short for 'Anime Convention', and it's basically a haven for nerds like me who are obsessed with anime. Anyway, I went with two of my friends, Cassie and Justine, and my other friend, Michelle, came with her little group. The entire weekend was one from hell, to make a long story short. Justine, Cassie and I stayed in a hotel room together and that just about made me ballistic. Cassie is 18, Justine is six (17 in July) and I'm 16, the entire time, they bugged me almost to the point of insanity. Cassie has a nasty habit of touching peoples elbows ever so lightly with her fingertips, and constantly for three days she did that to me. Constantly. I know she's supposed to be my friend, but I swear all i wanted to do was punch her in the face. Enough about A-kon now. Let's get on to what happened Monday night. Y'see, My World History teacher, Mr. Wood? He failed me for the second semester with a ******** 66. Now, wherever you guys may live, a 66 may just be a D+. Oh, not in Texas, oh no. The lowest passiong grade you can get it s 70. Anything lower = fail. So when my mother saw my report card sunday night, she went crazy and marched my a** up to the school promptly at 8 AM. I usually sleep until 10 or 11 over the summer, so i didn't take my early summer morning too graciously. i was pissed; why the hell couldn't she wait 'till later? And not only that, the night before she gave me this fifteen minute long speech on how, "getting these grades are not good on your record" and "how do you expect to do anything in life with a grade like this?" and "i don't know whats gotten into you lately,you used to be such a good kid, you used to love school", which really put me in a bad mood that carried over to the next day. i was in a really bitchy mood, and my mother isnt one for people who are anything but happy. she's the only one that can have emotions, apparently. so when i was in my pissy mood, she was all, "what the hell is your problem, rachael? stop acting like you're the one at a loss; i'm the one who has to pay for this s**t." of course, she didn't swear, oh no. She's a Jehova Witness. They don't swear. Anyway, that just put me in an even worse mood, and after she signed me up for summer school, she took my ******** iPod! It's like my soul and she took it away! she said that i was being disrespectful and immature and havine an iPod is a privledge and blah blah blah brussel sprouts. buiishit. I was the one who paid for that tourquise piece of metal, I was the one who begged my friend to put some music on it, i was the one who figured out how to work it, NOT her. even if she is my parent and supoporter, that iPod wasnt hers to begin with! /sigh/ i dunno. maybe i'm just being spoiled. again. i dunno.
you are not being spoiled!
i dont know why but moms are the most damned annoying things ever,
we should all know being of "that age".
i dont have an ipod but if i did i wouldve screamed and acted like a brat if i had been i your situation.
*sigh*
moms are the most bloody annoying things this world will ever know...
ITS NOT LIKE WE WANT TO HATE THEM!! |
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Posted: Fri Jun 08, 2007 9:06 pm
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Haaaaaaah.
I feel like s**t, again. My sister and I had an argument... something silly; I had taken her camera, she didn't want me too, and she basically yelled at me 'til I gave it back. It's dumb, but it's just nreminding me of everything that happened last year, and how dependant I still am on her, and everyone. I don't think I'll ever be able to live on my own, but I know I can't live with her anymore. "Et je ne peux vivre sans toi, mais je ne peux vivre avec toi..."
I can't wait 'til I know how to drive, so I can leave and sleep in the car when this happens. I understand her moodswings, but I don't feel safe anymore, and I can't tell her to stop. I can't bring myself to do it; I don't know if I'm gutless, but she needs me to just take it when she's angry like this. It's not about me... but once she's gone, what will I do? XP I'm living all this just so she can be happy, and feel alright.
Maybe I should just renegociate our relationship, like my therapist says; still, it's just one year, and I'm just too scared of what'll happen if I get her even more upset. Jumping out of cars like last year, running away... I don't want her to hurt herself. And in the good days, it's worth it. I don't know if I'm convincing myself to go through this because I don't want to face that I'll actually have to do something, or because I actually think this is the right thing to do. I just don't know anymore.
Sometimes when I try to talk to my friends about this, I just don't know what to say anymore. Well, whenever I try to tell them what's going wrong. If I do... I just grow clingy. I can't leave them alone, because I don't want to be on my own anymore. It's crazy how I can be constantly with my twin, but still feel alone. Maybe it's because we're so much alike.
And that's what I'm scared of-- that I'll just take advantage of people, insult them and manipulate them, make them feel like s**t. That I'll just grow like her in my relationships. I'm not sure I can really handle being close to someone again, but I desesperately long for it... I'm just not free, and I'm really immature. I don't think I'm really good at being with people.
Oh well. I'll feel better in the morning. Too much of my self esteem just revolves around her. I try to just go away, leave; but we share the same friends, so there's no one. I'm just alone, so it feels like I'm running away... but it feels good. I don't think it's permanent, because yeah. The loneliness settles in soon enough, and once again, it's not as if I had anyone to talk to. I guess I'll really have to be forced into it.
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Posted: Sat Jun 16, 2007 1:08 pm
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ARGH ok so my mom died recently from bone cancer, I loved the woman to death. It made me sad for a while but then I realized she wasn't suffering anymore so it was easier.
Just before she died, my "father" whom I haven't seen nor heard from since I was 4, that is 18 years mind you, he decides to show up with 3 kids and a wife I can't ******** stand. They try and act like things are all just great. After my mom died my dads b***h decides to step in for what I lost, she tries to become my mother. SHE EVEN CALLS HERSELF MY MOTHER! Anyway a few ******** months go by with fights up the a** and me avoiding them at all costs. So last night she decides to go through my mail and sees my phone bill that is $143, yeah it's high but it's none of her ******** business I pay for it. Most of the phone calls are long distance to my girlfriend in Cali, so what does she do, She calls my gf, thank god she wasn't home, and leaves a message basically telling her to "leave me the ******** alone" like I’m being harassed or something. What gets me is that fact that she thought I wasn't going to find out, that jossie would just stop talking to me. I mean I’m a grown ******** man, I live on my own, and I’m 22. What the ******** gives her the audacity to do something like that?
Gah I swear to god I’m so ******** pissed right now, so I went over to their house right, cuz I was mad and well you know I wanted to make her feel like s**t for trying to ruin my relationship with my fiancée. Guess what! They ******** go out of town mysteriously the day after she does this. Ah I swear I’m going to ******** kill someone. scream
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Posted: Thu Jul 05, 2007 3:46 am
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Posted: Thu Jul 05, 2007 3:50 am
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LordAmunShae ARGH ok so my mom died recently from bone cancer, I loved the woman to death. It made me sad for a while but then I realized she wasn't suffering anymore so it was easier.
Just before she died, my "father" whom I haven't seen nor heard from since I was 4, that is 18 years mind you, he decides to show up with 3 kids and a wife I can't ******** stand. They try and act like things are all just great. After my mom died my dads b***h decides to step in for what I lost, she tries to become my mother. SHE EVEN CALLS HERSELF MY MOTHER! Anyway a few ******** months go by with fights up the a** and me avoiding them at all costs. So last night she decides to go through my mail and sees my phone bill that is $143, yeah it's high but it's none of her ******** business I pay for it. Most of the phone calls are long distance to my girlfriend in Cali, so what does she do, She calls my gf, thank god she wasn't home, and leaves a message basically telling her to "leave me the ******** alone" like I’m being harassed or something. What gets me is that fact that she thought I wasn't going to find out, that jossie would just stop talking to me. I mean I’m a grown ******** man, I live on my own, and I’m 22. What the ******** gives her the audacity to do something like that?
Gah I swear to god I’m so ******** pissed right now, so I went over to their house right, cuz I was mad and well you know I wanted to make her feel like s**t for trying to ruin my relationship with my fiancée. Guess what! They ******** go out of town mysteriously the day after she does this. Ah I swear I’m going to ******** kill someone. scream
Step-mums are ******** messy bitches. I avoid mine at all costs. Which is easy at this age. Still, when I had to live with her and my dad the fights were many and the morale was low.
Set her car on fire. |
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Posted: Tue Jul 10, 2007 10:07 pm
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*This isn't directed to anyone reading this, it's more like a letter or something to my ex-friend*
Okay, stop thinking you have it worse than anybody else! Oh, boohoo, daddy's not around and momma can't keep you! Suck it up! At least you had grandparents kind and loving enough to take you in! Your mom loves you, she just didn't have the funds and she wasn't well enough to keep you!!!!! Just look at what she did for you!!!! She tried to spend as much time with you as she could, so you didn't have to go and weasel your way out of it every time!!! It's terrible that she just died, but I have a hard time believing it's affected you that much! You've called her whore, slut, b***h, ABUSIVE b***h when she never laid a hand on you or called you a name or told you your were worthless, jerk, every name you could think of, and again, you tried to get out of seeing her when she wanted to see you! Stop ******** crying about it and flipping out on everybody around you! It's not our fault she died! Stop calling her a slut, she's dead! She wasn't a slut! When she stripped, it was to support you, you ungrateful little brat!
Dammit, I held you hand at the night you found out, and skipped out on my father's birthday party to be with! I was with you or talked to you every night before the funeral and several nights after, and all you have to say when I tell you my mother has THREE ******** TUMORS in her brain all you have to say is, "Sorry, I have a lot on my mind right now."?!?! WTF?!!? Worse, you have to go and remind me that she could die! Hell, you pretty much told me she was going to! You don't tell your friend her mother is going to die, you stupid b***h!
Yeah, you can complain to me all you want, but when I try to talk to you all you have to say is, "Yeah, I have a lot on my mind right now, I can't listen to you"! Well, maybe I've got a lot of things on my mind, too, but I still try to help you!
And one of the worst things you could've done, you go and tell everybody about my sexual abuse! I wasn't telling you that for attention, and I sure as hell wasn't making excuses! I was trying to open up to you, and get it off my chest! Why the hell did you go and say, "Y'know, she says she was raped, but, really, she was just making an excuse when her mom took her to the gyno! She's a whore!" or "She brags about it for attention!" I am not a ******** whore, but you go and tell everybody that when you're supposed to be my friend?! You know I'm not a whore! Why would I brag about something like that?! Even when I told you, it was a slip-up!
If anybody's the whore, it's you. You're after, like, ten different people, over half of which already have girlfriends! You hang all over random guys, and your friends' boyfriends, and yet I'm the whore because I get hung on! I don't invite guys to hang all over me, they just do it! I consider a lot of them my friends, so what do you want me to do?! Freak out on them, hurt their feeling, kick their asses?! What?! I do tell them to stop!
When you found out I had an abusive boyfriend, and you saw my cuts and bruises, you pretended to be supportive. But, then, you went and told everybody that I did it to myself! That I was a cutter, and I did it for attention, then took the easy way out and blamed it on my boyfriend! I'm not that pathetic!
Stop being a victim! Yeah, I know you've been through stuff, too, but stop using it as excuses! Stop acting like you have it worse than everybody else! Everybody goes through stuff! Go to therapy if you have, it does help! You're just letting your experiences victimize you! I've been through a lot, and my mother has been through more, but we took it and we learned from it and allowed it to make us stronger! That's something you need to do, too, or you're just going to be a pathetic little worm the rest of your life, and people are going to get sick of hearing you whine!
You pretended to be my best friend until someone better came along, then you go and ignore me all the time! And then I find out you've done it with other people, too! You're going to screw-up, kid, and end-up with nobody. Excuse me if I hope that happens. Then, maybe you'll learn something! You cried to me about being so lonely until I came around, but then you only talk to me when it's convinient for you! You have so many fake-a** friends that you "don't have time for me". You tell me I need to have more than one friend, when you know damn well I do! But I always made time for you, and you could've done the same!
When he flipped out on you, why did you blame me for it?! I didn't put him up to anything! Is it that hard for you to accept that maybe somebody doen't like you?! That there's a guy out who doesn't want you hanging on him?! He's with ME, okay?! ME! He is true to ME! Go find your own damn boyfriend! You can't blame me for something somebody else does.
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Posted: Thu Jul 12, 2007 1:28 pm
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Posted: Wed Jul 18, 2007 12:54 pm
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Oh my GODS I'm unfit. I went swimming for the first time in years yesterday, and whilst I could manage 10+ lengths, it was only in breststroke, at snailspace xp I tried front stroke... nearly gave myself a stroke.
This explains the belly. NYU! least the toyboy likes girls with a little meat on 'em...or I'd be real down... which makes me feel shallow. AHHH Being a girl is annoying! We're not allowed to have wobbly bits, whereas guys that're big and fat and, frankly, desperately in need of a stairmaster expect girls to throw themselves on the floor infront of them. Ok, exaggeration, but, still, guys can get away with being bigger than girls and it annoys me. Stupid shallow society.
... maybe I really should reconsider dating a rock climber...and cyclist...and hiker (same person btw. Stupid fitness freak stare ). I refuse to go swimming with him. I'll feel really bad about myself then.
"hey! Izzie!! Whee!! this is fun!" *finishes 20th length in no time at all*
"wheeze, gasp, gulp. Drown."
...and its all my fault. I can't blame anyone *sob* crying
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