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 Posted: Wed Jul 08, 2009 7:13 am
Granted…you have a plate of golden waffles dripping with syrup but when you take a huge bite and start to chew, you realize that they are the worst thing you've ever tasted in your life and you have to run to the bathroom to throw up. There goes your appetite.
I wish all the weed in my yard would just die already!!!!!
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Posted: Thu Jul 09, 2009 10:36 am
Granted. You wake up one morning and you look outside to see all of your weeds, blackened to the touch. A small wind blows across your yard and the weeds turn to ash. You smiled for a bit till you see your flowers in the same condition. Then you realized that every living thing in your yard is dead. Apparantly, while you slept, a government truck holding an experimental gas crash nearby, causing instant death to everyone and everything. You quickly began to panic but fell into a silent shock as you see your fingertips turn black....
I wish I got a new car
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Posted: Thu Jul 09, 2009 6:38 pm
Granted, but it turns out to be a lemon. Everything starts to go wrong with it. Your mailbox is flooded with recall notifications, requesting that you take it back to the dealership for an exchange. You get another new car to replace the lemon and everything is running smoothly. After awhile, all sorts of things start going wrong with your replacement car, one right after another ... Here we go again!
I wish I had all new energy efficient windows and doors installed in my home.
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Posted: Thu Jul 09, 2009 7:40 pm
granted u got them now you have a bill to pay them off 100 dollars a month for 20 yrs then all the sudden u been hite in the head with a windo pane and went into a coma the rest of your life
i wish i had chocolate that are fresh and made to order from the factory
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Posted: Fri Jul 10, 2009 7:47 am
Granted…You now have fresh chocolates made to your order right from Belgium. They are sooooooo delicious and so addicting that you can't get enough of them. You sell everything you own to move next door to the chocolate factory and get a job there. All you want and all you can think about is CHOCOLATE! You become so consumed that you start breaking into the factory to steal chocolate in the middle of the night. You get caught and go to prison…where there is no chocolate.
I wish my landscaping projects were done and my yard was the most beautiful yard in the whole world!
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Posted: Fri Jul 10, 2009 8:54 am
*waves landscaping wand* done. your house is now a popular tourist destination. hundreds of thousands of families come to wander the place daily. Unfortunately, no one thought to build public restrooms, so hundreds of thousands of people knock on your door, needing to go, daily. some of them can't wait, and all possible entrances to your home are befouled.
i wish for three more wishes
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Posted: Fri Jul 10, 2009 7:29 pm
Granted... but in true genie style, your meaning is misconstrued and you get something far worse than you ever wanted...
Wishes I could go on vacation to a quiet island with no co-workers and no kids.
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Posted: Fri Jul 10, 2009 11:05 pm
granted but you were shipwrecked and the only survivor from the boat to make it to the island you soon relise that this island wasnt found yet and that means you were never found tell some many many yrs later as a skeleton wishes to curupt katana to the darkside in yoda's voice
beer is the guide to the darkside
beer gets you drunkeness
drukeness gets you beer goggles
beer goggles get you pretty woman
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Posted: Fri Jul 10, 2009 11:23 pm
Granted...I am now on the darkside......however.....now I have sent all of my minions after you, and you end up running from me for the rest of your life.
I wish I had a new pair of stiletto boots.
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Posted: Fri Jul 10, 2009 11:31 pm
granted you got a pair but there 4 sizes to small
wishes to have a nice pillow fight
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Posted: Fri Jul 10, 2009 11:40 pm
Granted....but the pillows are filled with metal spikes.
I wish I had a new pencil.
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Posted: Sat Jul 11, 2009 8:27 pm
Granted…in fact, have two! There you are with running around with your brand new sharpened pencils. OOPS…you fell and poked your eyes out!
I wish my dog would learn to heel.
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Posted: Sat Jul 11, 2009 11:32 pm
Granted, but he has learned the command so well, he now never leaves your side.....which can be a real downer on a Saturday night date! xd
I wish I could stay up later to watch the shows I like.
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Posted: Sun Jul 12, 2009 6:30 am
Granted. You feel brighter and more energetic than ever before and realise quite soon that you actually can thrive on just 30 minutes sleep. You cheerfully plan your self a major tellethon, TV dinners...Check, Beer cooler next to the couch... Check, Chocolates... Check, ect..ect..
You begin your epic night in and settle down to an episode of house... Only to realize its a repeat you saw last week on another channel. You switch over to an episode of CSI... again a repeat of a not particularly good episode..
You frantically surf from channel to channel looking for something that interests you but all you find is repeats, really bad cookery programs or bible bashing brain wash TV!! Your marathon is a wash out! Should of gone to the rental store instead!! xd
I wish my acid reflux would go away
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Posted: Mon Jul 13, 2009 4:22 pm
Granted…POOF, your acid reflux is gone and you are feeling great. Then comes your next meal. It's your favorite and you proceed to chow down. After a while you start to feel bloated. SURPRISE…you have no stomach acid at all and can't digest anything. Your last meal just sits there and eventually starts to rot inside of you! Eventually you die a horrible death by rotting from the inside out! Mwahahahaha!
I wish I was a marshall arts master and could even kick Chuck Noris' butt!
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