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 Posted: Tue Feb 21, 2012 11:31 am
Do you know what you got into
Can you handle what I’m ’bout to do------------------------------------------------}:-  SHOU
No escaping when I start .traeh ruoy nwo I ni m'I ecnO
Beautiful Dreamer
"Punishing you?" Shou turned and with a concerned face looked back as the microwave heated the chai. For a moment, he had to think about his answer because he hadn't really even thought about this...line of thinking. "I'm not trying to punish you. If I wanted to do that, I'd never have given us any chance whatsoever."
He frowned and looked down for a moment gathering more thoughts. Why did relationships have to be so...difficult for him? "I'm not trying to hurt you. I've never tried to hurt you. After the Tsunami...after being lost at sea, after what you had done when I returned, after realizing what you and Naoko did. And yes, I know you were hurting. But, you wouldn't even give me the time of day Jun, when I tried to reach out... I was dead to you."
"But don't you think, I was hurting too? Those feelings I let lose in the massage room...They came from my pained heart. And it needs time to heal. This is the first time I've seen you since I've returned. I'm not a heartless beast. If I didn't feel something for you, I wouldn't have given us an opportunity to...slowly work things out." he paused feeling as if his energy from before had faded.
"That word...I..." he sighed and stared forward not looking at anything in particular he had never been able to say those words even if his heart could say other wise. "My actions should have always spoke louder than words, Jun. If I didn't care then, I wouldn't have stayed, I wouldn't have come home at night to you...and continued partying many nights of the week. I wouldn't have cherished our times together..."
"But I did cherish those times...and it is what I had wished to come home to after I had been away at sea. That happiness happened for my dearest Izzy and not for me. I don't wish to hurt you, Jun. I know you're used to cruelty and you distrust many things, but I didn't slow things down because I wanted to have revenge. I wanted time to make sure I made the right choice. I wanted to work through whatever we had lost and make sure that we were both...in the right...space. I wanted to just enjoy some home cooked meals and getting to know each other...again. I know...you went through a lot too during the Tsunami....but I...." He stopped sucking in air trying to breath and not allow tears to fall that hedged at the edges of his eye. He knew that Ko would be coming out soon...and Naoko and Ryuu, He didn't want to ruin the holiday...
---------------------
"Yes, Presents! I played the piano downstairs and Uncle Shou tried to play the piano but...failed. Then he got lost on another planet for awhile when Jun-san showed me how to play my first notes on the guitar! I can play 3 notes now!" Ko held up 3 fingers as a sign of his accomplishments. "I think I need a smaller guitar though. Uncle Shou's is kind of big."
But then Naoko was talking about bunnies and snakes. And little Ko could see the Bunny reference because Naoko's hair was rather...mussed up and standing on end but then Ko looked at Ryuu for a long moment "Hebi?" He tilted his head and peered at Ryuu a little longer. "Hebi Jyanai. Koinu desu!" (Puppy) he said with a laugh as he looked at Ryuu's long hair all mashed down and tangled from sleeping. "Uncle Ryuu's hair is fuzzy like a puppy! Hebi don't have hair. And they have scales too. Uncle Ryuu isn't scaly!" The boy nodded confident of his child's analysis of the situation.
-:{------------------------------------------------Cause it’s about to get rough for you
I’m here For Your Entertainment
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Posted: Tue Feb 21, 2012 11:47 am
I can no longer return to those days free of bloodshed
These deep scars rooted within me will not disappear...
 "Gomen nasai..." Jun said gently as he crossed the room and took Shou into his arms. He could see the tears in those sweet eyes, and he couldn't bear it. "I won't push you. I don't want you to hurt. Gomen nasai. You're right, and I'm wrong. I love you. Please...don't cry. Don't suffer, or feel sad or angry...unless that's what you need to do to feel better...then...then you can come to my room and beat the s**t out of me, or cry in my arms, or do whatever it is you need to do. I swear, from now on, I'll be there for you, through whatever, whenever you need. If I have to cancel a show to come be with you, I will. You are my everything, and I'll forever regret ever making you hurt, ever letting any harm come to you at all. Gomen nasai. Gomen nasai." he spoke in between gentle kisses to the top of the blond's messy hair. Seeing Shou like this...it was just too much for Jun to bear. He wanted to keep his beloved happy, do anything for him...but at the same time he wasn't going to let Shou wear the pants in this relationship. Things just had to be...balanced. That was all. "Tell me what you want, beloved, and you shall have it." Hide it, Hide it
Hide me...
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Posted: Tue Feb 21, 2012 12:26 pm
Do you know what you got into
Can you handle what I’m ’bout to do------------------------------------------------}:- SHOU
No escaping when I start .traeh ruoy nwo I ni m'I ecnO
Beautiful Dreamer
Shou didn't stop Jun from holding him, his eyes found Jun's shoulder and the wetness soaked into Jun's shirt. He had tried so hard to avoid crying but still they flowed. He clamped his lips tightly so not to let any pained noise escape. He didn't want Ko to worry. That was the last thing he wanted.
So his ears listened as Jun spoke to him as he quietly tried pull himself together although he couldn't stop the sniffles from coming. "I wouldn't beat the s**t out of you." he whispered as he tried to stop sniffling. How he hated weeping...It made him feel more girly than he actually was. "I'd rather have you hold me...but you better not cancel a show."
His finger poked that point into Jun's shoulder because Shou never canceled. Well ok once he did cancel, he was sick as a dog at the time but he couldn't fathom any other reason beyond health. Sometimes one had to press through the worst of times and cope. Easier said that done but Shou believed that the Show must go on...no matter what.
The soft kisses on his head felt good...Jun was always warm that way. Much more so than some. He could have stood there just like that for a long time. Maybe the month could go by just like that, in his arms. It was warm...But he had to take things in stride. They needed real time to reconnect. He wanted to be fair to both of them. And the Tsunami was a terrible thing that obviously twisted their relationship. Giving time to unwind the knot...was responsible even if Shou wasn't noted for responsibility.
Was it the right decision? As he thought about it...Yes. He had Ko now. And if He and Jun were to be together in the future, they probably were going to be parenting and touring...and well that would take a lot out of them. Even if Jun loved him dearly, it would still be a lot of work. Shou wanted to feel good about their relationship if it were to be full time. Parenting wasn't just holidays and gifts. It was lots of sacrifice and devotion. How a Star like him was to do that, god he didn't know. But, he'd manage...somehow. Other stars did it, he could too!
"I know you don't want me to be sad. I don't want you sad either...I've just got a lot I'm working through and then there is Ko too. I'm going to do the right things for him and me. It's not going to be easy with my world so it will take a little time, Jun. That's all I ask...slow and easy so we can all be happy." he said softly as his ears listened for the others. He didn't want Ko to see them like this. Not until he had time to get the boy some real therapy. Shou didn't know what damage hid in the boy's head and he could only guess from Hamu's reactions that it hadn't been...healthy.
"I do...care...for you, Jun." he finally said very quietly. That was a far as he could push those words he couldn't say. He hoped that the man could understand some of his words without...words.
-:{------------------------------------------------Cause it’s about to get rough for you
I’m here For Your Entertainment
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Posted: Tue Feb 21, 2012 2:48 pm
What a shock, it was so surprising,
You looked so small and frail------------------------------------------------}:-  Izzy Lucky
At times life can be so enlightening .uoy no nrut nac ti tuB
"You. You're mind is always in the gutter." he teased with a tiny smile.
"Yes, its more than a few grand! And you don't know if the Devil will keep his word. You're banking a lot on that man's ability to respect a deal. I know you and your Grandfather don't get along but...he probably would have been a smart one to talk to in regards to Matsumoto Izo. I can't believe that the Chairman hasn't even given any strategy on how to handle his worst rival. This is ridiculous! Does he expect you can just wing this kind of experience?" Izzy was just amazed that looking at this situation left them so vulnerable even if Asato took over. Asato may have some knowledge about Matsumoto but certainly didn't handle the man. No that rivalry obviously had been all Koyasu Aki's business. Matsumoto Izo only seemed to find certain people worthy of his respect and with his power, well, pretty much anyone that didn't fit that category could get trampled in the industry.
And the more he thought about MeKA, he wondered if Rukuro's choice to remain in the US was based on this intense rivalry between companies. He wouldn't have been surprised. But then he wondered about his future....MeKA was bound to be his one day. However, he wasn't eager to take over. Maybe in 20 years? He'd be 49 and that seemed about...right. Well as long as Rukuro and Crystal remained healthy.
"Hayato-san was there? Interesting...and he never told Shou. I suppose I wouldn't either. Shou might throw a fit...far more than any Tsunami you've seen." Izzy sighed and shook his head. He wasn't pleased by any of this. His manager instincts kept telling him that all this was dirty but what could he do?
But then he pondered a bit more about the charity event as he looked at the coffee table and noticed an ad on an open magazine page featuring XFantasyX. Picking it up, he looked at the ad. Shou's 'girl' was featured. She was an unforgettable beauty now in the model industry. Such was the way that gold dust rubbed off from Star to hopefuls.... It had been a wonderful and tragic time but he had to admit that glorious show had people on the edges of their seats. Of course, he also knew that the XFantasyX model was also a small draw at the time She performed fluidly with both stars adding to the magic. Well she was one one of the reasons advertisers in some industries got on board. Yes, Izzy knew that Shou's team understood how to make the promotions work. In some ways, Smash had a better handle on promotional advertising. No...he had to take that back. Go Records had that game. If he dug deeper into the XFantasyX company he was sure he'd find Goshiro's signature. "You know, I really do hope you and Shou get a chance to work together again. Both of you on equal footing so he can see how great you can be when you're in high gear creating a show. You know you should really take a look at the DVD. You were in such a foul mood during those days...when your memories were fuzzy. I remember sitting down with Shou to work on the cuts to the DVD and thought I'd be doing it all myself because you left me with that enormous task. But then you showed up out of the blue just after we had started. I think I was a little relieved that I wouldn't be making those decisions on my own since it was your image."
Then, he listened to his young tiger's year in the making. It was a good idea...one that would take more work than either of them knew. Change was difficult but this one would be welcome in Izzy's eyes. He could see the small blossoms of changes in Akihiko already and he hoped that Narcissus would learn to deal with them. "It makes sense. And I think it's a good investment of your time. You'll become a better person for it...and your music will thrive from your changes."
"Me? Ah...This year, I've had some of the biggest changes in my life. So for me, this new year, I want to stabilizes those changes and make small adjustments. But as for bigger changes, I suppose...learning your world from the star's angle. I've seen it from the manager's side and I do know so much but it's a different side of the same coin. I know that I'll finish a full album but I'm not sure I'll be touring soon...at least on my own. I've still got many things to try and figure out. Then there is you, Chiyou...Nakai. I can't just drop my...duties. Shou will kick my butt if I don't tour somewhere."
"So now it's time for me to come up with a new question...This one is probably fairly important because we need to prepare. How do you want to handle your Grandfather for these last few months? I know this question is broad but I want to make sure that I give you the support you need. You're part of my US family too so if you need them to support you, I know they'd be there. Just want to make sure that with all that's happening I don't miss something vital. It's always the little things that get missed." he smiled tenderly and reached out to take Akihiko's hand. "I know you're also the type to try to hold everything together too...so if something hurts, don't be afraid to talk to me."
-:{------------------------------------------------I didn't know what to do
I grabbed the tiger by the tail!
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Posted: Wed Feb 22, 2012 6:32 pm
I can no longer return to those days free of bloodshed
These deep scars rooted within me will not disappear...
"I know..." Jun replied gently as he closed his eyes, deeply inhaling the sugary sweet scent of Shou. If he could only bottle that smell and carry it with him forever. It was the perfect perfume, but one he didn't wish to share with anyone else. "I know. You don't have to say anything more. I know. I'll never doubt you again. And...you're right. You have to worry about Ko-kun and yourself first. I can't be selfish anymore. It's a hard habit to break, though. A very hard habit to break. I miss being able to just...do as I wish with you whenever I want. Being able to just..." Jun moved his hands slowly down to Shou's hips, his lips moving closer, hovering just above his beloved's...then he stopped and pulled away, taking a step back. "Gomen...I told you...a hard habit to break...." the dark star apologized, holding himself back as it seemed Shou wanted him to do. Hide it, Hide it
Hide me...
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Posted: Wed Feb 22, 2012 9:11 pm
Do you know what you got into
Can you handle what I’m ’bout to do------------------------------------------------}:- SHOU
No escaping when I start .traeh ruoy nwo I ni m'I ecnO
Beautiful Dreamer
Ah...for a moment things were quiet. This was a good feeling for the Star of eternal storms. He probably smelled sweet because of the donuts and chai. One mug still waited for him in the microwave. But he didn't want to move to get it...not yet.
He glanced upward as his sniffles stopped and he found the means to gather himself once again. "Mm...I suppose we've new things to learn this year. Ah...Parenting will be quite an experience for me I think." His eyes drifted and watched those lips, he could feel those hands slowly drift to his hips. He took in a breath just as Jun pulled away. Thankfully, Jun did have some self control hidden within deeper passions.
"Yes...I can see that. I know...you want more. Just give us time." Shou answered and accepted the apology as he turned to open the microwave to pull out his chai. It still was hot and smelled like pumpkin spice blushed with sugar and cream. Perfect. Shou could drink vats of Chai as much as he loved the stuff even though Hamu tried to limit his intake or he'd bounce off the walls with a self inflicted sugar rush.
"I'm sure that Ko will have the others out of there soon enough. Oh..maybe I should put away some of these Legos." he said as he noticed the mess of them still littering the floor. He might not have noticed at all had he not needed a distraction from Jun tempted gaze.
After taking a sip of his chai, he set down the mug and started picking up the pieces that didn't make it on the various robots they had created. All the colorful pieces went into a special Legos tub that Shou filled up and then set by the packages. "I'm looking forward to hearing your new album." Shou said as he cleaned trying to stick to topics that wouldn't be awkward if Ko came running in. "I think, I've almost written enough for...my next album. I've had a lot of time to think about this album over the course of the weeks passing. And as soon as I return home, I'll be in touch with my Team to star recording and designing a new set. In a way, I look forward to feeling the stability of my world again. Although...all things considered, my life has changed so much from what I was before I left for Hawaii."
As he spoke, he also cleaned up the candy pile and put everything back into the stocking knowing the boy probably would dump it all out later. Once he was done, he went back over to the mug and pulled it to his lips for a longer sip then looked over at Jun with a soft smile. "Ah, you know,I have a feeling I'll need a clone of myself to keep up with the boy." he laughed as he leaned back against the counter. His eyes held great love for that small child and it probably was easy to see how much the boy inspired the Star.
Then he said to Jun in a quieter voice, "I'm glad that Ko likes you. I've a feeling you're going to be teaching him to play guitar more in the future. Because you know, he might go crazy if I taught him."
Suddenly though, Shou switched gears, "Naoko-kun....Ryuukaze-san, are you both going to sleep into the New Year?" he called out with a grin on his lips that covered his deeper thoughts. " I suppose sleeping now is OK because I'm going to work your skinny butts off after the New Year, but will you really make a young boy wait that long to open the rest of his gifts?"
Shou was teasing of course but he did wonder if he should open the coffee pot to send the aroma towards the room and maybe draw the men out.
-:{------------------------------------------------Cause it’s about to get rough for you
I’m here For Your Entertainment
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Posted: Tue Feb 28, 2012 2:25 pm
I can no longer return to those days free of bloodshed
These deep scars rooted within me will not disappear...
Crossing his arms and gazing up at the ceiling, Jun tried to ignore the fact that Shou was bending over to pick up the small toy pieces. "Ah...my new album. I'm not sure what I think of it yet. Some of it makes sense...some of it doesn't. What I can say...is that it is very different from what would be expected of me." the dark star explained, then listened as Shou spoke of his work. "Ko likes me? You really think so?" Jun's eyes brightened a bit and he looked directly at Shou, suddenly more interested in the boy than the man in front of him. "I do hope to be able to teach him. I want..." he cut himself off, a hint of pink to his cheeks. "I want him to grow up happy." he finally said, thinking it the best way of phrasing things. As far as Ryu and Naoko, though... "I'll get them." Jun grinned a mischievous grin and headed toward the door, rapping on it loudly and letting himself in. "Oi! You two better hurry up! There's food to be eaten and presents to be opened!" he sang, scooping up Ko in the process and holding him up in the air, making him fly like superman before setting him back on the ground. "Seriously...come on!" he added, before leading Ko back outside the musician's bedroom so the two men could get up and dressed properly. Hide it, Hide it
Hide me...
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Posted: Tue Feb 28, 2012 7:58 pm
Do you know what you got into
Can you handle what I’m ’bout to do------------------------------------------------}:- SHOU
No escaping when I start .traeh ruoy nwo I ni m'I ecnO
Beautiful Dreamer
"Doesn't make sense? Mm...maybe you need to sit down with your music and have a heart to heart talk. Sounds like you're in the middle of a change of direction in an artist's life. It could be that this album will be a bridge between the old and new you?" Shou said as he glanced back and eyed the dark star before returning to his task. Jun did need to grow and change. That much Shou could agree on especially when Shou knew that the man had other hang ups...one of those hang ups in the other room with Ryuukaze.
Sometimes Shou didn't know what to think about Naoko and Jun. A part of him felt...uncomfortably dizzy when that particular topic spilled into his headspace so he tended to avoid it and let Hamu deal with it. However, right now, it was actually hard to avoid with Naoko so close by. Maybe he was lucky that Ryuukaze was there. It gave a foil to his thoughts. Although Naoko wasn't the most faithful of partners. However, considering the last few weeks. Neither was Jun. But then again....Shou shook his head. HE himself wasn't committed to a relationship right now. Oh bother why was it so dang difficult to sort this whole thing out. It was almost as if he were related to Naoko or something with his own current state of indescribable uncertainties.
If only he knew how true that last thought had been. But the Star could never even consider the remote possibility because his memories didn't include a brother. However, all these thoughts as they spun through his mind brought on a slight headache. This probably was an irritation with the whole matter in a nut shell. He despised DRAMA.
Just when he might have gotten a bit more annoyed something interrupted the chain of uncomfortable thoughts. One word....Ko. His eyes lifted and he took a moment to think about what he just heard, "Ah.. yes, I think he does. He'd not let you hold his hand if he didn't. He took your hand didn't he?"
Then Shou smiled and the other thoughts were pushed aside, "Well then, You'll just have to plan to come over and do some tutoring then. You seem to have a knack for instruction. I'll even purchase a custom guitar for him." Then he paused for a moment considering the other thoughts, "I'm sure he will be happy. He has a real family now. And...he won't ever be wanting for the things in this world money can by. I'm going to put aside his college money after my next tour." His smile became brighter with that idea in his head.
Before he knew it, Jun was down the hall calling for the other men. Oh he wondered how that would go over but he figured that everyone would...keep good appearances for Ko's sake.
-------------
Ko squealed as he was picked up and lifted over head. The boy continued to giggle as his hands flew out wide. "I'm flying!"
"Yes you most certainly are!" Shou answered back with mischief in his eyes.
As soon as Ko hit the ground he was spring loaded and ran towards Shou's arms to get a big hug. "This is the best Christmas."
Shou could only smile and return that hug warmly thinking that maybe...he could be a good parent...just so he could cherish that smile every day.
Even as he thought of those sweet things, he knew deep in his soul that his peacock's wings could never rest. His tail feathers spread between his small family and the Web.
-:{------------------------------------------------Cause it’s about to get rough for you
I’m here For Your Entertainment
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Posted: Tue Feb 28, 2012 9:43 pm
(((OOC: I swear I'm working on posts right now. Been busy around the house plus I've been working on a new drawing (about 3-4 hours a day on the drawing alone)... and I made dangos yesterday! Drawing: WIP (Sion Astal from "Densetsu no Yuusha no Densetsu" which seriously needs some yaoi fanart out there of SionxRyner... seriously...)  Dangos: (I didn't have red food coloring... duh. Oh, and I suck at making circles out of mochiko...)    But yeah, I'm working on my posts right now so expect them tonight (or, you know, like 1 or 2am tomorrow) BOTH here and on your forum, Kaiko.))) EDIT: Okay not done yet... still working on it. They'll be finished tomorrow... afternoon probably... and uploaded in a giant batch (since I've got them in pieces in a word doc). Man I hate playing catchup... Between my EVIL internet (which has been giving me issue again yes) and suddenly becoming the cook/cleaner of the year... -yawns- So sleepy.... I feel like Ryner (DenYuuDen)... only I don't want to just nap all day... I'd rather nap and watch anime all day hehehehe.
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Posted: Wed Feb 29, 2012 8:17 pm
(((OOC: There wasn't anything for Chiyou so I didn't post for Kai... gomen...))) 
"If you'd squeezed me any harder you'd have been a boa constrictor." Naoko teased, looking in the room's mirror and running lithe fingers through his blond locks, trying to straighten them out somewhat and get rid of the bed head.
Amber eyes flashed in amusement. "Three notes? You know, one of the things about playing a guitar... you'll have to learn chords and notes, Ko-kun. It's different and yet similar to the piano." he spoke with a smile, glancing over his shoulder at the boy. "But I'm sure Shou would happily get you a guitar. Any musical instrument you desire. Who knows... maybe Ryu-kun can teach you some violin too, ne?"
It felt so good to see that little boy. Cold be damned, Ko was all the medicine that the younger Oumori seemed to need right now. The child's happiness was infectious.
And wasn't that what Naoko really needed right now?
A sign to show him that not everything in the world was sick and wrong?
Amber eyes went huge and Naoko couldn't help but burst into laughter, grabbing the dresser-like vanity to keep himself from toppling over onto the futon in a fit of giggles. "Ko-inu desu ne!" the pianist eventually said, barely able to hold back another round of amusement. "He's been told that before. But..." hearing Shou calling from the other room, Naoko straightened up and grabbed Ryu.
"Okay, Naoko needs to get dressed." he said, pushing Ryu toward's the door. "You too, Ko-kun. Let me put something else on and I'll be out in a minute."
Of course... to Ryu... he whispered a small phrase as he was shoving his lover out of the room. "I don't have a physical present... so maybe I can amuse you in another way, ne?" the blond asked before shutting the door and locking both violinist and boy out.
Heading over to his luggage, Naoko pulled out something he'd brought more for Sai than anything else.
But...
Well...
He knew Ryu would enjoy it too, no doubt.
Ten minutes later, Naoko stepped carefully out of the bedroom, his arms laden with presents, mostly all for Ko... but there were a couple for Shou as well.
However... while the presents would catch Ko's little eyes... the outfit would probably appeal more to the other occupants in the room.
Dressed in a fabulous kimono creation of orange, green, and white, with an obi of red, black, and white, the pianist looked more like one of the women who might be setting up the dinners for guests than a master of the ivory keys. His hair was done up with long wisps flowing here and there, bangs carefully perched to hide most of his gaze. However, unlike the charity benefit party, the young Oumori wasn't wearing makeup... and also wasn't as lavishly dressed.
"It's Christmas. Just a yukata won't do." the blond spoke with a wink, trying his damnedest to ignore Jun who... he was still rather pissed with. "It's a time to celebrate so... I thought I'd dress for the occasion." somehow he made a small 360 turn, setting the presents down on the table as he did so, in order to show off the kimono. "I designed it myself... though I don't know if I like the colors as much as I did when I picked them out..." the blond spoke with a bit of a frown before looking at Ryu. "Merry Christmas." Naoko said, that frown turning into a happy smile.
His amber gaze moved over to Shou and Ko as well. "Sorry I was late. Christmas and snow... just seemed like the perfect reason to sleep in."
(((OOC: Naoko's dressed like this... only with an armload of presents, hehe. http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-2PVbWYbrN8A/TfYxNwQlOrI/AAAAAAAABe8/Acv2w2YJt58/s1600/arreglar.jpg )))
Akihiko waved away the mere thought of his grandfather. "Ojisan's dealt with Izo for years. I need to learn to deal with him too. Next time I'll just pull the trigger and we won't HAVE to deal with him anymore." he said, obviously very serious.
Until he smirked a few moments later. "Joudan joudan..." sighing, the musician shook his head. "I don't know what the b*****d thinks or expects anymore, Ruki. I don't care..." there was a lie in those words and it was obvious, even to the young Koyasu.
Deep down... he'd loved his grandfather. After all, the man had been his only family... he'd... treated him as family... sure he hadn't been there all the time but such were the pressures of the job. Akihiko had been a very lonely and troubled boy who grew up to be an even more troubled and lonely adult.
The second Izzy's hand touched his own though, Narcissus recoiled, pulling his hand away almost instinctively. "I don't care anymore..." he whispered, refusing to look at his partner, repeating the phrase with a bit more conviction this time.
It wasn't Lucky's fault after all. The man hadn't done anything wrong but...
He'd shared so much of who he was with Izzy... but the darker side of himself... the side that craved that bond of family, true real blood family, couldn't bring himself to accept that help. Not yet, maybe never. If anyone else understood the neglect of a guardian, it was Izzy... but it wasn't neglect in this case... it was an entire life built on a lie.
Akihiko had never been loved by his own grandfather.
He had been nothing more than a face and a name and the seed to carry on the family name and business.
Clay... merely molded, albeit rather sloppily, so that Ohayou could stand.
Maybe it would stand because of Narcissus' career and not his fledgling business skills.
But either way... it wasn't love.
It never had been...
Had Aki ever even been capable of love?
Had the man loved his own son, Akihiko's father?
Or had he been the one who should have inherited this kingdom of song... instead of the worthless lump of clay who was naught but a voice and a beautiful face?
Wincing, Akihiko reached up and grabbed the side of his head, pain ripping through his skull just behind the eyes. It wasn't enough to make him collapse or cry out... just enough to get his attention.
Curling in on himself for a moment, the young tiger just held his head in both hands and tried to focus on something other than the blinding pain.
After about a minute he sighed, straightening back up, though with his hand still firmly in place against his head. "Lets not talk about him..." the musician whispered, feeling like a foolish child for avoiding the subject, but knowing that it might be the best course.
Avoid it until the b*****d was dead and gone...
Until all he had were regrets and hollow lies left...
"I think it'd make more sense for you to put out a few singles... play a few small venues or television programs, then focus on the full album closer to when you want to tour." Akihiko spoke, blue eyes focused in on Izzy now that they were talking about something else...
Something he could understand fully.
"I mean... it'd be pointless to tour without a full album under your belt unless you want to do cover songs... so just having a few, getting your name further out there... might be the best idea. Just think, you could work up a tour schedule for Nakai and then open for him." the musician smirked at the thought. "I'd let you open for me, but I already promised that to Michi-kun. Gomen." he added teasingly. "So get a handful of songs, four or five, and belt them out at some clubs or smaller events." leaning back against the sofa, Akihiko put the pain behind his eyes aside and focused on what Izzy would really need.
A musician and a manager were, like he said, two sides to a coin... similar... and yet very very different. "Or maybe you could do a joint album with Nakai or even Chiyou. I bet the 'kid' would love to sing with you... probably make his twisted little year." he added teasingly.
But this time... Akihiko didn't ask a question in return.
(((OOC: Posted here and on the other forum. I decided to try something different with Naoko, hehehe. Oh and by the way... Junichi Suwabe... NEEDS TO SING MORE SONGS... -dies- Seriously, he sings REALLY good. I mean you listen to him singing as Undertaker from Kuroshitsuji and then go to listening to him sing as Ren from Utapri and it's like OH MY GOD! Mmmm lately I've been reading this: http://www.baka-tsuki.org/project/index.php?title=Densetsu_no_YÅ«sha_no_DensetsuAnd I finished watching the anime for Densetsu no Yuusha no Densetsu... omg it's like my new anime love... seriously... SERIOUSLY... the yaoi possibilities in that show are just amazing! I mean really, when an insert song is playing that keeps saying "aishiteru" and all that's happening is one guy (aka king) is picking his best friend up in a carriage in the rain... ******** you know they're more than just friends, damn it! Especially since said friend always ends up sleeping in the king's (aka Sion's) bed randomly... -sigh- Sorry, I'm on a Shamrock Shake (milkshake from McDonald's made with mint chocolate chip ice cream) sugar high... kinda coming down from it right now... But yeah, I posted... Changed my avatar (it's cosplaying Sion)... Oh and there was also a contest on ClickCritters last week so that's why I was kinda MIA too. I won 4 of the 6 prizes though... named them after Gundam00 pilots hehehe. -blinks then falls over- I need sleep... I haven't slept but 3 hours in the last 48... I have some bad insomnia... I'm tired now but come 10pm I'll be wired again. Not gonna work on my Sion picture tonight though because my fingers still hurt from working on it so much yesterday... plus I think I'm gonna start either Togaiu no Chi or UraBoku... haven't decided which yet. I need shounen ai inspiration hehehehe.)))
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Posted: Wed Feb 29, 2012 10:47 pm
Do you know what you got into
Can you handle what I’m ’bout to do------------------------------------------------}:- SHOU
No escaping when I start .traeh ruoy nwo I ni m'I ecnO
Beautiful Dreamer
Before Ko was flown away as a small version of Superman above Jun head, he said, "Yes Three. I remember them too! See?" His fingers put themselves in the right position but stretching far on the big air guitar.
"I hope so! Ooo...and violin! Uncle RyuRyu do violins come in my size?" he asked curiously because the guitar had been so big.
The boy smiled brilliantly when Naoko laughed because he was Right! Ryu had puppy head. "Awh Ok hurry Uncle Naoko!" The boy at this point ended up flying high and out the door via Jun. His laughter heard down the hall. Ko had no idea that some people in the suite didn't like each other and that probably was for the best because the boy would have gotten nervous.
------
When Naoko stepped out, Shou blinked and released Ko just watching Naoko for a long time. His stormy eyes traveled from the floor to the hair and back down to the Kimono. "Kireina Onna no hito..." The words slipped in a whisper from his lips just before a hand quickly shifted back to the counter behind him.
Ko turned but looked up at Shou and his eyes watched those storm filled ones as if he could see something within their depths. "Daijoubu? Don't move so fast....Uncle Sh...ai. You'll fall down." His small hands returning to the man's side as if he could hold him steady with his small body.
'Shou' blinked again and his other hand slipped to Ko-kun surrounding him protectively, "I'm ok, Ko." His eyes dropped down to Ko, a distraction from the kimono and the man in it. In order to fill the space, not missing a beat he said, "I was just astounded by, Naoko-kun's beauty, Ko. He looks so lovely in that kimono and the colors are perfect. Don't you agree Ko-kun?"
"Uncle Naoko looks like a girl! Kawaii girl! Oh look! There are presents!! YAY!" Ko blurted out and squirmed away from Shou's grasp.
"Yes, he does." responded the blond that released the squirming boy. Shou smiled at Naoko, who had filled his field of vision for moments on end, "I suppose that sleeping in isn't a bad thing. Although, I think Ko-kun probably wouldn't agree." But those eyes finally flicked from Naoko across the room, taking in the rest of the surroundings. Pausing on Ryu and his held smile remained upon his face and then they traveled further to settle on Jun. He blinked and tilted his head, turning away to walk over to the coffee pot and pulled out a few mugs. "Ah...mmm...Any one want some coffee? Or Cocoa?"
"Me!!" answered Ko, who was not even remotely interested in Naoko now and racing head long towards the presents. Once there, he plopped his small body in front of the piles he hadn't opened yet. "Which one can I open first?"
"Ko-kun! You've got to wait until we are ready." Shou said firmly as he set out the last mug.
-:{------------------------------------------------Cause it’s about to get rough for you
I’m here For Your Entertainment
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Posted: Wed Feb 29, 2012 11:38 pm
What a shock, it was so surprising,
You looked so small and frail------------------------------------------------}:- Izzy Lucky
At times life can be so enlightening .uoy no nrut nac ti tuB
Izzy's eyes remained on Akihiko as he spoke. He didn't say a word as the man spoke of murder. It could have been because the thought had crossed his mind once or twice for numerous reasons but each time, he didn't have proof that could pin the b*****d down.
Maybe he shouldn't have asked the question, he thought to himself because surely this one question had touched a very sore spot within his partner. And still, Izzy remained silent and listened to the lie. His eyes relayed that truth that he knew as well as Akihiko - an obvious...lie.
But when the Akihiko pulled away and wouldn't look at him, he should have spoke sooner. It was as if a wall had closed that space between them. Now Akihiko was in pain and Izzy was setting down his cup so quickly. "Dajoubu? Should I go get your medication?" Worry replaced all the words he could have spoken...should have spoken.
And what could he say even if he had spoke? The old tiger had only tired to shred him to bits when the buck tried to mend this situation. Was it just so hard to see that Akihiko just needed some....love...family...his grandfather in his life even for a short moment?
Frustration, oh yes, he knew the world of rejection all too well. But he had a family that took him in....loved him. Sometimes this frustration brought thoughts that could bring the buck's fresh antlers back down to try that desperate charge one more time. Force the old tiger to relent...repent.
Izzy could fight that hard for the man he loved but even if he could force the old tiger to relent, he couldn't create love where there was none. But was there really no love in that old tiger's heart or was he just as walled off as Akihiko had been? A question that Izzy thought deserved an answer because he didn't want Akihiko to be left with...emptiness.
"I guess you're right." he answered back realizing he had been lost in thought while Akihiko was responding to his thoughts about the concert and album. "I need a little time to work things out and I"m not sure I'm the right act to open for Nakai. Oh...god I have so much work to do to get him on the tour circuit." He put his head in his hands for a moment thinking about all that. When was he going to have time?!
Looking up he laughed, trying to block out the knowledge of his future time shortage for the next year. "Oh I don't think I want to open for you. Way too much pressure. You'd be a perfectionist...and everyone would want me to sing your song and then hope you'd sing it...and compare us. And then I'd have to worry about you dragging me on to stage to be your mic. No no...I'm not opening for you." He put down his foot on that idea right away because he knew Narcissus...the devilish perfectionist plus bossy, sexy, stubbornness would be everywhere like testosterone!
"Besides, you'd be troublesome and I'd never get enough time to practice my small set on stage." he teased and started to relax just a little listening to the real advice past the playfulness. "I'll write my own songs. I'm thinking that doing covers would only put me on a second rate circuit. I don't want to be there."
"I suppose I can set up a few dates for myself once I get a backup band. Ha! I can manage myself. I've got those skills in spades." he shook his head and sighed. Those words stung, "Ah...Chiyou's just troubled. He's not a bad kid...really...." Sometimes when Akihiko teased about Chiyou it just made the manager a little sad inside. He had tried very hard...even with only being a manager...to do the right things by Chiyou. He had never expected the boy to fall for him.
Chiyou's beautiful music at the charity even was probably the best he had ever heard from the boy. And a tour should have followed...should have. All those things that should have been done were now lost behind blind eyes and a doubtful future. One that he as a 'parent' in a way had to figure out.
And here he was, he hadn't thought much about Chiyou and those problems on the ocean, in LA....and now back in Japan, he couldn't hide from it anymore. Was that one among many reasons he hadn't want to return. Responsibility was a dark shadow that loomed before him.
It was difficult to feel the wings of his own future being tied down by every one else's needs...When would the world revolve around his own desires? Could he ever feel that momentary flight of freedom spun upon the ocean waves again? Or was he destined to only witness that vision within the Illusions spun by his fantastical friend, Shou?
He hadn't noticed that Akihiko didn't return a question to him. Instead, he picked up his cocoa and took a long sip unsure about his future.
OOC: posted in the other forum as well. -:{------------------------------------------------I didn't know what to do
I grabbed the tiger by the tail!
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Posted: Thu Mar 01, 2012 7:13 pm
 ~( Lonely ) Mayotta nara~
~( Try again ) Nando datte~
~Yarinaosu koto dekiru kara~
So he was a dog. Go figure. It seemed that was the general consensus, so what could he do, really, but sigh and smile? "Of course I can teach you some violin, and they do make violins that would fit you just right. When we get back to Tokyo, I promise to get one just for you, mk?" Ryuukaze grinned, slipping out of the bed and straightening out his clothes, giving his hair a once-over with his fingers for good measure. Next thing he knew, though, he was being pushed out the door right behind Jun and Ko. What Naoko whispered to him had him quite curious, to say the least. Moments later, the pianist finally emerged from the room...and the violinist was left speechless. Even without makeup on, Naoko had the beauty of a goddess in that kimono. All Ryu could do was stand there smiling as he thought how damn lucky he was. ~( I’m here )~ Soba ni iru wa~
~( Believe me ) Osorenai de~
~Shinjiau koto....~
~FOR YOU~
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Posted: Thu Mar 01, 2012 7:43 pm
I can no longer return to those days free of bloodshed
These deep scars rooted within me will not disappear...
When his ex-lover emerged from his room, Jun took a moment to look the pianist over. Indeed, Naoko was as beautiful as ever...but instead of thinking he wanted the blond, he found himself thinking that it was all...pretentious. What, exactly, was Naoko trying to prove with this flashy getup, anyway? That thought was quickly pushed aside as he observed the slight change in Shou, and heard the slight change in Ko's behavior. Frankly, Jun had no idea what to think about everything that had just happened, but he certainly wasn't about to make any assumptions. Instead, he smiled warmly at Shou, then turned to follow Ko to the presents, kneeling down beside the boy and whispering, "What did you call your Uncle just now? Do you know...a secret?" Hide it, Hide it
Hide me...
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Posted: Thu Mar 01, 2012 8:34 pm
(((OOC: -twitch- I would post... but I'm not done typing it up and apparently my mom wants me to unplug my computer from the modem so she can "look something up" which is probably houses which is retarded because we can't buy a ******** house right now.
SO!
I'll have to post tomorrow since apparently the whole "ashley likes to plug into the internet at night so she can get on gaia" has been forgotten. -twitches in annoyance-
If I tried to post on here without being plugged in it would give me an error because Gaia hates HughesNet and vice versa. Damnit I'm so pissed off right now... She had the ENTIRE TIME I was working on the drawing to do this AND when I was cleaning earlier today!)))
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