[+][L-N+][P-UL] ~ SHOUNEN POP - 少年ＰＯＰ ~

[Ryuu Minamoto]

I can no longer return to those days free of bloodshed
These deep scars rooted within me will not disappear...









Hayato listened.Every word, every fact was crucial right now.
This had to be eased into, ever-so-delicately. Inch by inch, even, until he had himself where he needed to be.

"I'm glad you're doing better. Honestly...I've been a complete mess myself, lately. I'm sure we're both rather unstable right now."

That's it...make Naoko feel equal. Make him comfortable. Share with him, reel him in...but be careful not to break the wire.

"I'll do my best to keep you out of trouble, if that's what you're having a problem with, still. Listen...you know you can come to me any time you're having a problem. If you feel like you can't handle yourself, or that you might lose it...I can handle that. You don't have to be afraid around me. I'll protect you and everyone around you, if I need to. Hell, that morning you showed up...it wasn't so bad. Shou...he actually understood, after a while. He was cool after...heh...I think, deep down, he wanted to protect you just as much as Sai did."

Hide it, Hide it
Hide me...

 

[Nileregwen DoUrden]

"I don't exactly... know when I'm unstable." Naoko replied honestly, he shrugged out of Hayato's gentle massage and paced as he spoke, arms wrapped around him.
Having Jun here was great and all... but he wanted Sai...
Why couldn't Sai have lived instead?
Turning, the pianist blushed slightly, obviously embarrassed. "Sometimes... I just fade out and there's another me... only he's not me because he just wants the blood and the pain and... I'm stuck inside myself... screaming to be let out. Unlike Shou, I know what goes on when I switch." he shook his head. "And I can't control it. It just happens. I'm... dangerous... which is why Ryu's always nearby. I mean, he's just in the next room after all."

 

[Ryuu Minamoto]

I can no longer return to those days free of bloodshed
These deep scars rooted within me will not disappear...










"Naoko.....kami-sama...." Hayato gasped, the look of concern on his face as he heard what his love had to say on the matter.

So...this is what Naoko had become. Like him. Just...out of control. It was a beautiful thing, though. Like....like creating a child.
Fancy that....Hayato was a father!
If that were the case...then it would only be proper to give his progeny a proper upbringing.

"Kitten....I hate to say....but that is....it's incredibly dangerous, to be that way. Why...for all you know, something could set you off and you could hurt Ryuukaze. Kill him, even! I don't want to imagine such a horrible thing happening...but...what if it did? Are...are you sure it's safe to be around him? If you really did lose it...I doubt he could sufficiently protect himself. You've got to learn to control these....episodes."

In other words...come to him. Naoko should come to him...for Ryu's sake, and for his own. After all...Hayato could teach him how to control himself. Naoko already knew that. Very well.

Hide it, Hide it
Hide me...

 

[Nileregwen DoUrden]

But Naoko shook his head, "Actually... I thought the same thing until this latest episode... Ryu he... he brought me out of it. Literally. His arms just..." amber eyes closed as the blond remembered that moment. "He saved me from hurting him bad. I'd bitten his lip and scratched his arms a bit... but he pulled me back."

Looking at Hayato, Oumori was determined. "I won't leave Ryu. I can't leave him... even if I wanted too... remember? I told you that night that 'he' threatened Ryu... well if I leave him, he'll make good on it. I can't just run away because I'm ******** up in the head." which was the truth.

Naoko moved back to the grand piano's edge, leaning over it to plug out a piece of lint stuck on a string.
Someone really needed to dust this thing...
"Besides," the blond said, wiping dust off the string as he spoke. "I love him. He makes me feel happy... wanted... loved. I... haven't felt that way in a long time, you know..."

 

[Nileregwen DoUrden]

"Ok...you can seme whenever I'm not the seme to you. God...I feel so....good." Michi laughed as his ear was licked, "Hey! That tickles!"

Michi planned on having more days like this with Akihiko...many more. Since Izzy appeared to be gone, Akihiko needed an outlet and well, Michi enjoyed being that outlet.

His arms encircled his lover and he just held him for awhile. But this closeness was nice..comfortable and intimate. The music could wait a few hours...Michi had a feeling this would give Akihiko a good reboot.

~ ~ ~

Being held like that... just, being able to lay in the arms of another person and let go...
He didn't even realize it was happening, but silent tears were leaking from Akihiko's eyes, landing on Michi's bare shoulder. The musician didn't move though... just lay there, face buried in the physical therapist's neck.

"You know... next time I'll have to use the high pitched voice." Akihiko teased, though that only made the tears leak from his eyes all the more.

He wasn't sobbing or sniffing or anything... but there was an obvious overflow of tears.

One hand was laying over Michi's chest, the fingers clutching the sheet on the other side of his friend's head. It was as if the young Koyasu were trying to hold back an entire dam...

"Gomen... I'll be alright in a second..." Akihiko whispered, knowing obviously that something was wrong.  

[Kaikoloren]

Let the Memories of the Evening be...
the first think that you think of------------------------------------------------}:-

Tanaka Michi
Physical Therapist

Fingertips...walking up your spine...a tongue sliding right behind..

"It's alright...I'm here. Just let it go. It's ok. I won't tell a soul." he said quietly and honestly. Oh he knew what was wrong. It didn't need any definition nor did he ask. All he did was hold Akihiko and make sure that the man had some one strong to cling to.

It wouldn't be like this forever. Michi knew that. One day, Akihiko would be able to look back and it wouldn't hurt so bad. It would be a dull ache. Until that day though, Michi would try to be the stalwart companion no matter where his career took him.

Michi kissed Akihiko on the head and remained quiet...like a big body pillow.

-:{------------------------------------------------when you open up your smile and see me.
...Dark Star.

 

[Ryuu Minamoto]

I can no longer return to those days free of bloodshed
These deep scars rooted within me will not disappear...










Frowning, Hayato shook his head.

"I hope, for both of your sake, that you're right. I don't want to see anyone hurt or dead over this..."

So...he would have to look for another way in. And quickly.

"Loved. I'm glad you feel...loved." the vocalist said, sounding so very hurt and alone. Regretful, even.

"I felt...so loved...with your brother. He taught me what love really was. I would give anything...anything at all...to feel like that again. To even come close..."

Delicate hints...putting thoughts in the younger Oumori's mind. Since Naoko's brother was gone, Naoko was the closest there was to the man. They actually looked somewhat similar, even.

Hide it, Hide it
Hide me...

 

[Nileregwen DoUrden]

"I'm so pathetic..." Akihiko spoke after about ten minutes of silence passed between the two men.

He, thankfully, wasn't crying anymore.

With a sigh, Narcissus sat up, curling his legs beneath him as he did. "And obviously it's not your fault that this happened. I want you to know that. You're... you're my only real friend, Michi-kun. Guess I just feel comfortable around you... like I don't have to prove anything to you." he sighed again, rolling his eyes. "Unlike the rest of the world..."

Quickly, the musician stood, stretching his arms up over his head. "I should get back to work... you know..."

 

[Nileregwen DoUrden]

"I can't love you, Jun." Naoko spoke calmly, still cleaning out the piano strings.
He hated it when instruments weren't cared for... and this would make the sound even more clear.
"And I can't replace my brother. I've got Ryu now... and yeah, I'm glad you want to protect me and no doubt I need it but... I just can't be involved with you like that. Not if I truly love Ryu. You didn't want to be with me because of Shou, right?" the blond looked over his shoulder at Hayato, getting that confirmation. "Shou's gone so now you're going to ask to be with me, aren't you?" he sighed, shaking his head as he went back to cleaning. "I can't. I won't. I was scared and drugged and literally tripping out and couldn't find Ryu anywhere so I came to you and Shou... Sai... for help. This is... different. We're both grieving... I... I loved him too, you know... and I loved him longer..."

 

[Ryuu Minamoto]

I can no longer return to those days free of bloodshed
These deep scars rooted within me will not disappear...







Anger....anger boiled and bubbled and rose inside him until it threatened to spill right over.

Now was not the time or the place, though. Not at all.
If he let himself loose now, he'd only cause himself more trouble, and make things harder on himself in the long run.

Hanging his head, the dark vocalist trembled a bit. It looked more like he was sad than angry.

"I'm sorry, kitten. I do...do love you, though..." he said as he turned away.

"I understand how you feel, though. You love Ryu. That's a great thing for you. And...no...you could never replace your brother. It's only...you're the only other man I've ever loved...even if I didn't always show it...."

With that, Hayato left the room, heading down the hall.

It would take a while, but he knew exactly what he had to do. He would have his Naoko, one way or the other. He just had to keep playing his cards the right way.

Hide it, Hide it
Hide me...

 

[Nileregwen DoUrden]

Naoko froze, but he didn't say anything.

Even after Hayato had left... he didn't do a single thing. Eventually, the musician walked over to a row of chairs against the wall and sat down, seemingly exhausted.

"You're the only other man I've ever loved...even if I didn't always show it...."

Naoko sighed, 'No... you showed it alright... but you showed it in the only way you knew how... pain.'

There had never been a doubt in the blond's mind that Hayato had once loved him, probably did still love him deeply... but that sort of love was wrong... painful...

Loving Jun was almost as bad as his punishments from Izo... and that was saying a lot.

Ryu was gentle and kind, though tough and rough in bed when you asked him to be. But he never scared Naoko... never made the man want to run away...

Also a big plus that he never locked Naoko in a closet...

"Damn it, Jun... you just had to make things complicated. Why couldn't you have just stayed gone?" the blond whispered to himself before standing and heading toward the other recording room.

He wasn't going to be able to get any more work done.

Might as well see if Ryu was ready to head home yet.

 

[Ryuu Minamoto]

~( Lonely ) Mayotta nara~
~( Try again ) Nando datte~
~Yarinaosu koto dekiru kara~

Ryu had been crooning into a mic when he heard the door crack open.

Turning around, he saw exactly who he expected to see.

"Baby..." he beamed, turning everything off and opening his arms wide as he dashed to his blond beauty, scooping him up in a sweet hug, kissing his pretty little face all over.

"It's almost time for the benefit gig! You excited? We're doing some special work with this one!"

~( I’m here )~ Soba ni iru wa~
~( Believe me ) Osorenai de~
~Shinjiau koto....~
~FOR YOU~

 

[Ryuu Minamoto]

I can no longer return to those days free of bloodshed
These deep scars rooted within me will not disappear...













Well...he was already here in the main SMASH building, and he knew that the b*****d would want to speak to him, so he may as well get it over with, he figured.

Heading up a few floors, Hayato walked with a purpose right up to Matsumoto Izo's office, knocking three times at the closed door.

Hide it, Hide it
Hide me...

 

[Ryuu Minamoto]

Nezumi hadn't heard a word from Narcissus since he had spoken with the man. This was either a good sign, or a bad sign. Which, he wasn't really sure.
His best option was to speak with Hiroki-san about it. Last thing he wanted to do was overstep his bounds, or provoke Narcissus. Things still had to be dealt with a bit delicately as the vocalist healed and dealt with the recent events.

Heading to the next room over, the mouse gave a short succession of tapping knocks on the door, hoping the man would answer. Of course, it was likely he was very busy, or not even in at the moment. The manager just hoped to have a chance to speak with him before he decided to go speak to Narcissus again.

 

[Ryuu Minamoto]

kawaita tsumori ame ga tsuzunaku katari kakeru
namida wa seijaku ni...samayou yoru ga akeru

Days had passed slowly since he heard the news. No good news seemed to come. All he ever heard was the same old thing. No change. Nothing different.

At least Kai had been there for him. His rock. His everything.

The guitarist was in the floor playing with Yumi as Chiyou sat on the couch, listening to an anime on tv as he gazed blankly at the ceiling. So grey...so nondescript and empty.
Looking down, he smiled as he gazed at Kai....bright, colorful, clear. Like a dream, almost.

"I love you..." Hideki said sweetly, out of the blue. There had been no reason for him to say it...he just did. Couldn't help it, really. The emotion just welled up so strong in him that it poured out.
No....he couldn't imagine life without the guitarist after all they had been though. No way he could ever let Kai go.





karada o tsutau ame ni furueru awai omoi
guren no yuuwaku ni...samayou yoru ga akeru