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 Posted: Wed Mar 24, 2010 1:48 pm
Furloughed from my job, the Army wishes I would just quietly die so they don't have to give a real reason to deny my request for reenlistment, Someone was, and I wish I was making this up, set aflame several blocks from my home. I haven't been able to find the person who did it. I sorta failed. Really, like, time for the recycle bin failed at life. I can't provide for my friends, I can't serve my nation, I can't even keep my own neighbourhood safe. I serve no purpose. My existence is a net negative on the world.
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Posted: Thu Mar 25, 2010 5:17 am
Fiddlers Green Furloughed from my job, the Army wishes I would just quietly die so they don't have to give a real reason to deny my request for reenlistment, Someone was, and I wish I was making this up, set aflame several blocks from my home. I haven't been able to find the person who did it. I sorta failed. Really, like, time for the recycle bin failed at life. I can't provide for my friends, I can't serve my nation, I can't even keep my own neighbourhood safe. I serve no purpose. My existence is a net negative on the world. Your existence is not a net negative. You have taught me much in the few interactions we've had. The fact that you try and how hard you are on yourself when you do fail shows the positive influence you have. You are your worst critic, if you look around and through others eyes you may see that you are viewed in a better light then what you see yourself in.
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Posted: Thu Mar 25, 2010 9:37 am
The woman on fire wasn't your fault, Fiddler. She apparently did it to herself, and no one saw it coming. Even if this were not the case, the fact that you care enough about her, regardless of knowing her, to worry about finding the person that did this? That says to me that you're not a waste of anything. You care. A lot. And for that, thank you. heart Follow-up story.
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Posted: Fri Mar 26, 2010 4:39 am
Fiddlers Green Furloughed from my job, the Army wishes I would just quietly die so they don't have to give a real reason to deny my request for reenlistment, Someone was, and I wish I was making this up, set aflame several blocks from my home. I haven't been able to find the person who did it. I sorta failed. Really, like, time for the recycle bin failed at life. I can't provide for my friends, I can't serve my nation, I can't even keep my own neighbourhood safe. I serve no purpose. My existence is a net negative on the world. Mayhaps you're pining for a purpose you're not meant to serve? Mayhaps your purpose at one time was to protect and to be a soldier and serve your community through militant means. Mayhaps now that you're a veteran, mayhaps now that you've seen more of the world your purpose has changed. We can't always serve the world in the way we want to, and indeed, that sometimes is because we could serve it better another way.
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Posted: Fri Mar 26, 2010 4:54 am
I understand you're dying, yes. I even understand you're in a lot of pain. I've seen it, the dying and pain of others, this is what I work with every day. I've even seen some who have it worse than you. But you're in pain, and you're dying, you're weakening every day and you know it and that frustrates you, and God do I sympathise.
What I don't like is your meanness.
Look, here's how it works when your body is ******** dying, slowly, due to terminal illness; your body gets very hurtable, even gently touching the wrong place will be painful for you. Your growing frailty drives you up the wall, and so you get frustrated easily, and annoyed easily. And this is just the beginning, if you think this is bad enough.
For this, my heart goes out to you.
What saddens and angers me is when you go out of your way to be a jerk. When I come into your house to be a sympathetic companion, one a bit stronger than your frail wife and thus can get you standing, sitting, and help you in and out of bed, as well as any other number of things, you make it your business to treat me like a faceless opinionless servant. You don't want to talk to me, you don't respect me, and you don't listen to me.
Further, and here is where I really take issue, even when you're being a cranky jerk, when even your wife, who isn't the most empathetic person anyways, who'd rather I were much older so I wouldn't be some screw up little boy in her eyes, points out such to you, YOU WON'T APOLOGISE.
Here's how it's going to work when you're dying and a hospice health aide comes to take care of you:
I'm going to bother you, not intentionally, but I'm going to have to hold you, stand by you, be near you, just to ensure your safety and comfort, and that WILL annoy you. There is no way to avoid that. What we can do, is understand that you're going to be annoyed, and that that isn't my intent even though I understand it is inevitable. If we both can understand what's happening and have a mutual agreement that I don't mean to aggravate you when I do and you don't mean to upset me when you do, then no harm done.
But I don't think that's the case for you. You've become bitter, and now you've made it your job to not like me and make such clear.
I don't think the next time you act snidely I will suffer silently. I think the next time you make it a point to be a jerk, I will make it a point to politely and respectfully stand up for myself, to you, and to your belittling wife.
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Posted: Fri Mar 26, 2010 5:33 am
Gho the Girl I understand you're dying, yes. I even understand you're in a lot of pain. I've seen it, the dying and pain of others, this is what I work with every day. I've even seen some who have it worse than you. But you're in pain, and you're dying, you're weakening every day and you know it and that frustrates you, and God do I sympathise. What I don't like is your meanness. Look, here's how it works when your body is ******** dying, slowly, due to terminal illness; your body gets very hurtable, even gently touching the wrong place will be painful for you. Your growing frailty drives you up the wall, and so you get frustrated easily, and annoyed easily. And this is just the beginning, if you think this is bad enough. For this, my heart goes out to you. What saddens and angers me is when you go out of your way to be a jerk. When I come into your house to be a sympathetic companion, one a bit stronger than your frail wife and thus can get you standing, sitting, and help you in and out of bed, as well as any other number of things, you make it your business to treat me like a faceless opinionless servant. You don't want to talk to me, you don't respect me, and you don't listen to me. Further, and here is where I really take issue, even when you're being a cranky jerk, when even your wife, who isn't the most empathetic person anyways, who'd rather I were much older so I wouldn't be some screw up little boy in her eyes, points out such to you, YOU WON'T APOLOGISE. Here's how it's going to work when you're dying and a hospice health aide comes to take care of you: I'm going to bother you, not intentionally, but I'm going to have to hold you, stand by you, be near you, just to ensure your safety and comfort, and that WILL annoy you. There is no way to avoid that. What we can do, is understand that you're going to be annoyed, and that that isn't my intent even though I understand it is inevitable. If we both can understand what's happening and have a mutual agreement that I don't mean to aggravate you when I do and you don't mean to upset me when you do, then no harm done. But I don't think that's the case for you. You've become bitter, and now you've made it your job to not like me and make such clear. I don't think the next time you act snidely I will suffer silently. I think the next time you make it a point to be a jerk, I will make it a point to politely and respectfully stand up for myself, to you, and to your belittling wife. I don't know if this will help at all, but I say my grandmother go through this. After she broke her hip and couldn't get around on her own anymore she became bitter, angry and all around unsufferable. I lived with her for 8 years after that. She went from a somewhat loving grandma to the monkey riding all of our backs, which only made it worse for her and made her more bitter and more angry. The two of them may just be stuck in a bad feedback loop that just keeps getting worse. If this is the case there is likely little you can do other then just be there. Brining their treatment of you to their attention could make things better or worse. It's up to you.
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Posted: Sat Mar 27, 2010 12:45 pm
I. Hate. Essays. scream Thesis ideas are evading me like the plague. If I didn't have to write this essay to pass the course, I'd have given up already.
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Posted: Sun Mar 28, 2010 3:05 pm
lexipthemudkip I. Hate. Essays. scream Thesis ideas are evading me like the plague. If I didn't have to write this essay to pass the course, I'd have given up already. this.
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Posted: Sun Mar 28, 2010 3:37 pm
whiporwill-o lexipthemudkip I. Hate. Essays. scream Thesis ideas are evading me like the plague. If I didn't have to write this essay to pass the course, I'd have given up already. this. this. again.
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Posted: Sun Mar 28, 2010 5:39 pm
Is it anything I can help with, collective essay haters?
What courses are you despising?
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Posted: Mon Mar 29, 2010 4:33 pm
I've written six articles, plus two articles for the joke paper. I have one photo credit. I have conducted three Campus Interviews. I have done 11 weeks of proofreading. If I don't get staff status tomorrow, I'm going to throw a stapler at the arts editor's head. stare
Note: the requirement for staff status at the paper is three pieces in one category. I obtained that two months ago and the Arts Editor rejected me because he wanted me to write for other sections. There are people who've written for only one section who have it. stare
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Posted: Tue Mar 30, 2010 9:36 am
I slept through an exam this morning. In a class I was already blowing off way too much. I emailed the teacher, told her I'm an idiot, and begged for mercy. Oh goodness I hope I don't fail my first class. It would be really embarrassing to fail a 100-level in my position.
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Posted: Mon Apr 05, 2010 8:44 pm
I swear, if my parents go on one more time about me being quiet and how I should network more, I might have to not talk with them for awhile.
You know, because I'm currently more involved with student politics than my sister ever was. gonk
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Posted: Tue Apr 06, 2010 12:27 am
I thought I was paying rent to have a room to myself.
While I understand that this is not my house, I do not appreciate my landlady coming in my room and moving around its contents. One of my drawers, which may in fact have a rather vibrant hot pink d***o in it, is now closed, and the cup I had overturned on top of a spider is missing. So is the spider. Great.
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Posted: Tue Apr 06, 2010 1:44 pm
Byaggha Is it anything I can help with, collective essay haters? What courses are you despising? i have to write an argumentative essay (900-1800 words)... hell, i could probably get alot of ideas from the guild XD in other news *sigh* i made a 76 on a math test u_u i am so bummed, my lowest grade in the class up to this point was a 90... teacher says that i can use my final to replace my lowest grade if i make higher on it *fingers crossed that 76 will be my lowest test grade and that i pull an A out of my back pocket for finals!*
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