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 Posted: Sat Mar 12, 2011 8:08 pm
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I can no longer return to those days free of bloodshed
These deep scars rooted within me will not disappear...
Peals of laughter came from Jun as the scene began to unfold. Indeed, he had done well with his playful scheming.
"Beasts, Ishi-san? Yare, yare....I guess I really am The Big Bad Wolf." he chortled, bringing his hand to his mouth, trying to cover his cheese-eating grin.
As his ear was kissed, Hayato turned his attention away from the others and immediately focused in on Shou, as though there were no one else in existence when the star addressed him.
"Mmmmm...really, baby? Too busy? I didn't know you looked at the little manager and Narcissus-san in such a way." he grinned and leaned forward, kissing Shou's painted lips. He wasn't one for self-restraint, as long as he knew he wasn't being filmed or photographed. Really, he could care less about everyone on the plane having to tolerate his blatant PDA.
But then Izzy Lucky was going on about something else and Jun looked up just in time to see the manager lick his spoon.
Well....he was a cute one. A very sweet one. It made him regret what he had done even more, and he already regretted it to the core of his being.
Yet...at the same time, what Ishi had just done was the funniest thing ever! Coming from an innocent like that, especially!
Once again, the dark vocalist burst into peals of laughter.
It really would be the best vacation ever. It was starting to be the best flight ever already.
Hide it, Hide it
Hide me...
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Posted: Sat Mar 12, 2011 8:21 pm
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Posted: Sat Mar 12, 2011 8:23 pm
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kawaita tsumori ame ga tsuzunaku katari kakeru
namida wa seijaku ni...samayou yoru ga akeru
"Sugoi? Supa man?" the young blond tilted his head, puzzling over that statement.
"I don't get it....I...well....I guess you're right. Huh. That's odd....it was like I could see where I was going....but I know I can't see. Weird....cool!"
Happily, Chiyou let himself be pulled into Nakai's arms as he giggled like a child.
"Mm...I hope I can go home soon. I don't feel like I need to be here any longer. The medicine they gave me is making me feel much better already. As a matter of fact..." Chi grinned, getting an idea. He really wanted to test something.
"Tag! You're it!" he blurted out, pushing Nakai away just enough for him to take off out the door and down the hall, moving rather quickly, and not running into a single thing.
He could feel it...feel the way the air shifted around objects, walls, people...he could practically see it. It was...crazy. It was probably the most awesome thing he could imagine, being blind as he was.
If he could get by this well...well, imagine how it would be if he actually got some sight back!
karada o tsutau ame ni furueru awai omoi
guren no yuuwaku ni...samayou yoru ga akeru
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Posted: Sat Mar 12, 2011 8:34 pm
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 ~( Lonely ) Mayotta nara~
~( Try again ) Nando datte~
~Yarinaosu koto dekiru kara~
How long he had been out of it, he wasn't sure, but he imagined it couldn't have been but a moment or so...
Slowly, Ryu opened his gem-like eyes, gazing up at Naoko.
"Naoko..." the violinist whispered, smiling. Carefully, he reached up and brushed a lock of blond hair behind the pianist's ear.
"Gomen nasai...I guess I was a bit shocked. I remember now. That you didn't mean to hurt me. You tried to save me. I remember,somehow, hearing what you said. You're the reason I lived, baby. I remember that now. You're the reason my heart kept beating. I lived for you."
Sitting up again. though dizzy, Ryu grabbed for the ring, removing it from the box and taking Naoko by the hand, sliding the gem onto his ring finger.
"I will always live for you, Naoko."
~( I’m here )~ Soba ni iru wa~
~( Believe me ) Osorenai de~
~Shinjiau koto....~
~FOR YOU~
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Posted: Sat Mar 12, 2011 9:25 pm
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~( Lonely ) Mayotta nara~
~( Try again ) Nando datte~
~Yarinaosu koto dekiru kara~
No...this wasn't what he wanted. He didn't want more tears...didn't want more fears. Yet...it was obvious something was deeply wrong with Naoko. Something incredibly broken.
"Baby...baby shhh...it's ok. It's ok. Sweetheart...if this is over Hayato and all that...just let it go. I'll take you to any doctor you want to see, anywhere at all, if that's what you need. You know all you have to do is ask. I'll do anything for you. You don't have to cry."
It hurt, knowing that Naoko, for whatever reason, didn't seem to want his commitment, but it was there, whether the pianist wanted it or not. He didn't feel he could not love the man. There was just too much in his heart for Oumori Naoko.
"Don't you know, baby, that you are my forever. You are like a spouse to me. You don't ever have to be afraid anymore..."
But oh, if only Ryu knew...
~( I’m here )~ Soba ni iru wa~
~( Believe me ) Osorenai de~
~Shinjiau koto....~
~FOR YOU~
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Posted: Sat Mar 12, 2011 9:35 pm
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"I'm just so angry..." Naoko whispered between his tears. "I want to hurt people, Ryu... all the time... I... I see someone happy and... and... and I just want to rip their throat out... I can't stop it..."
The pianist was shaking, trying desperately to tell the truth... but knowing he couldn't...
Not everything...
If he did...
Well, Ryu would be dead.
Simple as that.
"And yesterday the... with the drugs, I... I don't remember what happened but I just crave all the time, Ryu-kun." he licked his lips, looking to the man who he still held close. "And it hurts... every part of me hurts and I don't want you to have to... I don't want you caught in this... please... you... you nearly died before because of my messes!"
Standing, the pianist released his lover and paced across the room, one hand on the back of his neck.
He was rubbing at the bandage... a bandage which had bled through thanks to his constant nervousness and scratching.
"I don't want you to die, Ryu... please..." Naoko whispered brokenly, his back to the violinist. He clenched his hand, bringing it up to look at the ring on his finger. "If I ever lost you... I... I..."
But he couldn't finish the sentence.
He couldn't say that he'd die too...
That he'd kill himself...
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Posted: Sat Mar 12, 2011 9:45 pm
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~( Lonely ) Mayotta nara~
~( Try again ) Nando datte~
~Yarinaosu koto dekiru kara~
So that was what it was, huh? It had all been too much for Naoko...and Naoko couldn't cope anymore.
Well, he could understand that. After all Naoko had been through, all his problems before hand...how could he not lose his grip on things?
When Naoko stood, Ryu followed, turning Naoko to face him as he pinned the pianist to the wall.
"Baby, I want you to listen to me, and listen to me carefully. I am not going to die. I am not going to go anywhere. You are not going to fall apart, because I won't let you. I'll hold you together, one way or another. Ok? I promise...even if I have to put my music career on hold. You come first. Now...do you want me to take you to a doctor now? What do you want? Focus, doll, and tell me what it is you need me to do."
Whatever Naoko said, he would do. He had the money to do nearly anything that need be done, and if he had to, he figured he could ask his boss, Matsumoto-san, for any further help.
~( I’m here )~ Soba ni iru wa~
~( Believe me ) Osorenai de~
~Shinjiau koto....~
~FOR YOU~
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Posted: Sat Mar 12, 2011 10:06 pm
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~( Lonely ) Mayotta nara~
~( Try again ) Nando datte~
~Yarinaosu koto dekiru kara~
Worse and worse and worse...
At this point, Ryu couldn't imagine how things could be any worse.
The situation was horrible as it stood, but he tried to keep his cool, think with a level head, and do what had to be done.
"Sweetheart...you mean to tell me you went out and got drugs? I thought you were just slipped some in a drink? I don't understand...but sweetie...we have to do something, even if it means having you, you know, "go on a vacation" for a while."
Walking across the room, Ryuukaze picked up Naoko's coat and sifted through his pockets, pulling out the drugs.
"Kami-sama..." he said, shaking his head in disappointment. Not so much in Naoko as in himself for not being able to prevent this.
Stepping back over to the blond huddled on the floor, he knelt down and helped him to his feet, walking him over to the bed and wrapping him in the blanket.
"I know you never wanted this, darling. Nobody ever said you did. But we have to do something about this, no matter how bad you don't want to."
~( I’m here )~ Soba ni iru wa~
~( Believe me ) Osorenai de~
~Shinjiau koto....~
~FOR YOU~
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Posted: Sat Mar 12, 2011 10:19 pm
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"I was slipped them... but then they wore off and... and I wanted it so bad... I couldn't help it. I... I didn't want you to know or see me like that so... so I..." tears leaked from his eyes, even as he sat on the bed, wrapped in the blanket.
But he couldn't help rubbing his neck again... like he could rub away what he'd done... tear it out of him physically...
"Don't... please just don't leave me alone, Ryu... please... I..." he took a quick breath, trying to get his explanation out. "When Hayato left to... to get you, I... Ryu, I dislocated my thumb to escape handcuffs... I clawed up the floorboards with my bare hands to get to a pipe so I could carve a hole big enough for my hand in the door. When I got downstairs he had you and... and I begged him to stop... I said I'd do anything for him... even dress up as Jun if he wanted but... but it pissed him off and... and he started to choke you... he was going to... to break your voice again and... and I... all I could think about was your beautiful voice and... and I just grabbed the pipe I'd used and swung but... but he moved and... and I..."
Naoko gasped softly, removing his hand from his neck, fingertips coated in his own blood... but he didn't stop talking even as he clutched the blanket tighter around his body.
"I killed you... I didn't mean to but... but I... I killed you, Ryu. You were dead. And I just... I wanted to die... I wanted him to just kill me too but... but he wouldn't and... and I cried and cried for hours, curled up against your body..." the pianist's expression was hidden by his hair as he recalled those dark hours. "He made me do things to you, Ryu... he enjoyed watching me suffer... just like Jun did... and I couldn't escape... I couldn't run because he said he'd kill Sai next and I had to protect him because I... I couldn't protect you and..."
It was then that Naoko looked up, genuine pain and torment in his amber eyes.
A look that Ryu had never seen in the man before.
Ever.
"I killed you... and all I ever wanted to do was protect and love you. I would have died for you, Ryu! I still would! And I was so afraid of you remembering and learning the truth... so afraid you'd hate me but you... you..." the hand with the ring clenched tightly as he felt that weight on his finger.
A weight reminding him that this man really did love him.
"I see other people who don't know the horrors I've had... who take their happiness for granted... and I just... I just want to..." he shook his head, looking away. "I wanted to push you away from what I'd become... I never wanted you to know this darkness, Ryu..."
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Posted: Sun Mar 13, 2011 10:38 am
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~( Lonely ) Mayotta nara~
~( Try again ) Nando datte~
~Yarinaosu koto dekiru kara~
"I won't leave you alone, Naoko...but you have to calm down." the violinist continued trying to soothe the blond...but he was beginning to feel a little out of control himself. He had dealt with a lot, and he knew how to handle a lot because of it, but this was something far more intense than he had any idea how to manage.
He listened silently to his lover explain the events that lead up to this, and the more he heard of the details, the more he understood just how Naoko got to this point.
And then...when he looked up with those tortured golden eyes, Ryu knew this was beyond him. He didn't think he could fix this just by loving Naoko.
That didn't mean he was giving up on the man...but he would have to do something. Perhaps a lot of things. And Naoko very well might not like some of them.
"Tenshi, you can't be like this, you know that, right? You can't let these things consume you. You simply cannot be angry at everyone who has some sort of happiness. That isn't right. Beloved...if you let this eat you alive, then you will be losing me, because you won't be the one I love anymore. And...I don't think I could live like that. Not without you." he pulled Naoko's hands down and held them as he spoke.
"Now, do you want to get ready and go find some help, or do you have any other suggestions on what we should do?"
He sounded a bit cold, even to himself, but Ryu was doing his best to be objective now. Fix the problem, then deal. He was trying to, at least. It was difficult for him not to freak out and have a meltdown, but he managed....for now.
~( I’m here )~ Soba ni iru wa~
~( Believe me ) Osorenai de~
~Shinjiau koto....~
~FOR YOU~
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Posted: Sun Mar 13, 2011 10:46 am
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kawaita tsumori ame ga tsuzunaku katari kakeru
namida wa seijaku ni...samayou yoru ga akeru
Giggling all the way, Chiyou didn't trip, didn't fall, didn't run into anything. It was amazing!
At least...until he couldn't tell where he was.
Yep...he was lost. Totally. And when he realized that, he became frightened....and when he became frightened, he lost control of himself and could no longer tell what he was around.
Stumbling, the blond ran into a wall, clinging to it, trying to follow it...until he hit a drinking fountain and bruised his hip on it, slipping and falling.
"Kai....Kai!" he cried out, hoping the guitarist was somewhere. It was terrifying now. What had been fun had become a nightmare. For all he knew, he would fall down an elevator shaft if he kept moving.
Curling into a ball, Chiyou fitted himself underneath the fountain and began to cry until someone came and got him.
karada o tsutau ame ni furueru awai omoi
guren no yuuwaku ni...samayou yoru ga akeru
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