In a bad mood? come here and rant till you feel better

[Namikikyo]

Honestly, I want you to hurt as much as I do. I want you to feel what you've done to me and experiance it like I did.

I hate you. I. Hate. You.

People are not pawns in your silly little game. I hope you learn this before it's too late

I'm not one to act on the urges of revenge, but I am seriously considering it. Pretending to my friend isn't making me change my mind, either.

 

[bones89]

Fiddlers Green

Where were you when your world first shattered?

1. When my Dad took me out of school at five years old and he told me my mother wasn't going to be coming home from the hospital.

2. When I was 16 and the same hospital that killed my mother told me I was being sent to a rehab/psych ward for being morbidly depressed. I watched my Dad cry for the third time in my entire life that day. The first when we found out my mother was sick, the second when she died...

3. December 27 -28, 2007.... I made one of the biggest decisions of my life and I regret it almost everyday...  

[EternalHearts]

Fiddlers Green

Where were you when your world first shattered?

1st time: April 26, 2006--my partner and fiance of the last almost 4 years told me she didn't want to be with me anymore; that although she loved me, and wanted to be with my someday, then wasn't it, she wasn't able to be in a relationship. 5 months later she was dating someone. I've been in another relationship for the last 2 years, and am still not over my ex.

2nd time: December 7, 2008--I ignored a phone call from my dad to get a little more sleep. When I listened to the voicemail 15 minutes later, it was my uncle, crying, begging me to call home. My father picked up and just repeated over and over that my younger brother was dead. He'd died during the night & was found by my father that morning. He would have been 25 on Christmas Eve.  

[Violet Song jat Shariff]

Fiddlers Green

Where were you when your world first shattered?

When I was 3, I watched my dad beat my mom, tear apart our Christmas tree and smash the presents.

Then again, when I was about 6 or 7, he beat her up again, destroyed our living room. My mom left with a suitcase and my dad screamed at my brother and I to clean everything up and that he wished we'd never been born and then he left too. We were home alone, crying and cleaning the living room, for about 3-4 hours before my grandparents came over since they were in town.

The most recent...I've just simply blocked. There's too much of it to digest.  

[whiporwill-o]

whiporwill-o

Fiddlers Green

Where were you when your world first shattered?

february 29th, 1992. front yard, playing with my cousins. my dad called one of the neighbors to come get us, my pawpaw was having a heart-attack on the sofa in the living room. we were walking down the street when the ambulance pulled up to the house. he was dead before they got there. crying

the second time, i was in, i want to say, third grade. my mother pulled me from class and tld me that my shi-tzu had died. i was devastated. i didnt go to school for 2 days. when i got her there was something wrong with her hind legs, they were under-developed or something. i had to lie her on her back and exercise her back legs every day and eventually she got to where she could run around with me when we went outside. she was my very first pet, we'd had dogs all my life, but they were all outside dogs and they played rough so i did little more than pat them on the head and keep moving. it still makes me sad and i suspect foul play, though it has never been confirmed.  

[Aino Ailill]

[ShadowCatSoul]

So apparantly not only am I a slut, whore, and skank, but now I am the cause of her miscarriage and don't deserve kids of my own. I'm also apparantly an annoying stalker.  

[TeaDidikai]

ShadowCatSoul

So apparantly not only am I a slut, whore, and skank, but now I am the cause of her miscarriage and don't deserve kids of my own. I'm also apparantly an annoying stalker.

Can't really see you serving Horus actually.  

[Fiddlers Green]

I should probably answer my own question.

My world shattered, and has never been completely whole again, after I witnessed a person being punished for something they did not do.

1st grade, recess, early winter. One of my fellow students was on a swing. Another student told them to get off. They didn't. That other student and his friends went to the recess monitor and said that the 1st child had kicked him from the swing. This was a lie. The majority testimony corroborated it tho. The swinging student was placed in "the square" a 3' x 3' chalk box that students being punished had to stand in while everyone else took recess. I over-heard the monitor telling the student in the square he was bad and should be ashamed. Both for what he did and for lying. Sounds silly really, but that moment destroyed my previous faith in the way the world worked, justice, and authority. Other events were far worse in my life, but I was prepared for them because I already was aware that those in power are neither fair nor omniscient. This I was unprepared for.
Mayhaps the part that made it so destructive for me was when I reported the incident at home, my family for the most part shrugged and said that sort of thing happened as tho it were not only expected, but also accepted on a tacit level.  

[ShadowCatSoul]

TeaDidikai

ShadowCatSoul

So apparantly not only am I a slut, whore, and skank, but now I am the cause of her miscarriage and don't deserve kids of my own. I'm also apparantly an annoying stalker.

Can't really see you serving Horus actually.

Who said anything about Horus?  

[TeaDidikai]

ShadowCatSoul

TeaDidikai

ShadowCatSoul

So apparantly not only am I a slut, whore, and skank, but now I am the cause of her miscarriage and don't deserve kids of my own. I'm also apparantly an annoying stalker.

Can't really see you serving Horus actually.

Who said anything about Horus?

You did.  

[TeaDidikai]

Scrapping an entire suit of my hand drawn tarot deck. stressed

Restarting from scratch.  

[whiporwill-o]

TeaDidikai

Scrapping an entire suit of my hand drawn tarot deck. stressed

Restarting from scratch.

why gonk  

[TeaDidikai]

whiporwill-o

why gonk

It isn't turning out the way I need it to.

The other suit I finished works. It's aesthetic makes sense. This one was forced, and didn't come together in a way that feels appropriate.  

[ShadowCatSoul]

TeaDidikai

ShadowCatSoul

TeaDidikai

ShadowCatSoul

So apparantly not only am I a slut, whore, and skank, but now I am the cause of her miscarriage and don't deserve kids of my own. I'm also apparantly an annoying stalker.

Can't really see you serving Horus actually.

Who said anything about Horus?

You did.

Where?