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 Posted: Sun Oct 11, 2009 9:41 pm
Laughing softly, Eduard turned himself and Peter in the direction of the house and, with one arm still around the actor from behind, starting heading in that direction.
"I've been wanting to do that all morning to be honest." Eduard spoke softly, a strange shy glint in his dark gaze. "And no, it wasn't any sort of test. I just... well... I wanted to get you mind off things."
'Kill two birds with one stone... settle my own raging hormones and make you temporarily forget what I carelessly said.'
(((Poor Peter. Eduard doesn't know how to make him stop blaming himself)))
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Posted: Mon Oct 12, 2009 6:36 am
P e t e r - W i n t e r sPeter raised one eyebrow. All morning...? This just got him more confused, but he said nothing. It seemed like Eduard was feeling better, and he wasn't going to ruing that by asking more into the matter. He had enjoyed the kiss himself, though he wasn't sure if that was him or Rosaline. That was the problem with playing a role almost 24/7; the line between oneself and the character grows fuzzy.
He looked like an epiphany had overcome him. Though Eduard was good looking—there was no doubt about that—Peter knew that that fact alone couldn't have attracted so many women. But now that he had experienced a deep and sensual kiss with Eduard, he finally understood.((I'm confused. Does Eduard love Peter?)) L a d y - R o s a l i n e
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Posted: Mon Oct 12, 2009 4:06 pm
"Your silence means your confused, doesn't it?" Eduard asked as they stepped onto the porch.
A tray of hot tea was sitting on the table, waiting for them.
Without hesitating, the Marquess released Peter and began to pour two cups of tea, setting them across from each other. He indicated that the actor should sit down and he himself, did the same.
"To answer an unspoken question," Eduard spoke, lifting the tea and letting the warm steam seep between his gaze and Peter's own. "I've been in bed for two days. Now, I'm finally outside and... well..." he shrugged, sipping the tea for a moment. "You were convenient."
However, Eduard held up one hand. "Don't start beating yourself up over it, Peter. I don't mean that you YOURSELF is convenient... I meant that your presence beside me this morning was. Ever since I woke up I've been wanting to do that. You're..." he set the tea down, leaning back in the chair and staring up at the clouds drifting lazily by overhead. "You're important to me, Peter. Very important. And sometimes I don't think my own mind can differentiate between you yourself and Rosaline. Your.... Your femininity in that role was convenient, your acting skills and portrayal were convenient. Rosaline is convenient... hell, I suppose the notion of her was from the start." he sighed again, looking directly at Peter. "If you'd set yourself up in such a way as I have, then you'd understand. Two days in bed for someone used to a warm body beside them in the night is... well... uncomfortable. But then last night I wasn't alone now, was I?" he asked, raising an eyebrow. "God I'm horrid at explaining things today... I've already made a mess of it once." Eduard leaned forward, folding his hands together on the table. "The simple fact that I woke up with you in bed, or rather in YOUR bed, prompted my want of that kiss." he smiled slightly, "I was also hoping it would get your mind off my earlier explaining failure which... apparently it hasn't."
The Marquess leaned back in his chair again, picking up his tea. "I told you I was selfish, Peter. Selfish and, to be quite honest, rather vain."
(((At this point, not really, hehehe. He's a complicated man... *urge to sing SHAFT song rising*)))
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Posted: Mon Oct 12, 2009 7:55 pm
P e t e r - W i n t e r sPeter tried to make sense of what Eduard was saying, but he just couldn't make heads nor tails of it. His confusion was still evident on his expression. When Eduard completely finished, he laughed a little, trying to sort out the information within his head. "Selfish? Vain?" Those didn't fit with the Eduard he knew, or at least the one that he thought he knew.
Peter was a little hurt at being called 'convenient,' though he said nothing about it and disregarded it. If everything about him and 'Rosaline' was convenient for Eduard, then so be it. He didn't understand why he wanted to dwell on it so much though. Usually, he would have just forgotten that anyone had said that and continued on with his life, but when it was Eduard, for some reason, that became hard to do.((I think I'm just as confused as Peter xD)) L a d y - R o s a l i n e
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Posted: Mon Oct 12, 2009 8:12 pm
Sighing, Eduard looked back up at the sky. "Nevermind..." he whispered, his voice so soft that it would have nearly been impossible to understand.
In truth, the Marquess had feelings for the actor, though they were so mixed and clouded with the feelings he was supposed to portray for Rosaline, and the actual feelings that he did have for this brilliant character, that even Eduard himself was having problems sorting it out.
He was a playboy be trade, after all... always with a women on his arm... always with one in his bed.
That notion ******** b*****d... Rutherford was right...' he thought to himself before closing dark eyes and trying to calm his own anger.
Since the moment that Eduard had woken, he had wanted to kiss Peter. He had NEEDED to kiss him. Or perhaps not him but Rosaline?
Either way, his own body had been demanding it.
He'd gone two days without kissing lovely lips... and two days felt like a lifetime to someone who was accustomed to doing such a thing at least once a day, if not numerous times.
But he couldn't exactly explain that to Peter because the young actor wasn't a playboy... though technically...
Mentally, Eduard shook that thought from his mind. Peter was in plays and he was a man... men used to be boys... had Peter begun acting when he was younger?
Again he had to mentally shake the thought away because right now, such a thing was just simply distracting.
"Yes. Selfish and vain. I want things and when I can't get them I take them by force. I'm also obsessed with how I look, if you hadn't noticed." Sighing, Eduard straightened back up in his chair and leveled Peter with his dark gaze.
A gaze that was masked... more for the actor's sake than anything else.
'Just hate me right now and get it over with.' he thought... because that was a normal reaction. 'Hate the me you see right now, Peter... because if you don't... if you don't then you'll see who I really am...'
Could Eduard really take that though?
Could he allow Peter to see him for his true self?
In truth, the Marquess didn't throw women away... in fact... he tended to drive them away after only a few days, if they were that even stubborn.
He didn't want other people to know him like that...
(((I hope that explained things a little more...)))
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Posted: Mon Oct 12, 2009 8:18 pm
P e t e r - W i n t e r sAll Peter did was laugh at Eduard's reply. It was more of an amused and happy laugh. He was obviously either getting better or masking it behind his skillful acting. It was actually a little bit of both. Peter still was trying to sort out his view of Eduard, but he definitely was sure that Eduard wasn't the vain and selfish man that he said he was. At least, to Peter he definitely wasn't.
Peter leaned on his hands, elbows propped on the table in the most unladylike manner and smiled. "I think you look wonderful. Everyone else agrees that you're dazzling in both charm and looks, so why is being 'vain' so bad? I don't think that you're obsessive over how you look. You just make yourself more presentable than everyone else around you." Peter stuck by his reasoning in his mind also. To him, Eduard was free of most vices that haunted mankind.L a d y - R o s a l i n e
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Posted: Mon Oct 12, 2009 8:30 pm
For a moment, Eduard didn't say anything.
But then he smiled slightly, "You are quite hopeless, Peter." the Marquess replied before picking up his tea and sipping the warm contents once again. "Then how do you explain my selfishness, hmm?" he asked with one raised eyebrow. "I kissed you in the middle of the garden... surely that was selfish of me?"
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Posted: Mon Oct 12, 2009 8:58 pm
P e t e r - W i n t e r sWhen the kiss was explicitly mentioned, Peter blushed. "I... Umm... W-well, did you k-kiss me or R-Rosaline?" Peter was curious about that for more than just figuring out if Eduard was selfish or not. It would help him with his attempt at sorting Eduard's character out and seeing just what their circumstances currently were.
Peter sipped his tea absentmindedly, not even tasting what was going down his throat. But the warmth of it was relaxing, and that was exactly what he needed at the moment. His gaze remained averted; he had only managed to look up a little towards the end of his question.L a d y - R o s a l i n e
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Posted: Mon Oct 12, 2009 9:21 pm
Sighing, obviously uncomfortable with that question, Eduard stood and paced to the patio railing. He braced himself against it, leaning into the soft breeze and seeming to collect himself.
"I don't know." the Marquess replied honestly. "I kissed you. You weren't pretending to be Rosaline so... that's the only obvious conclusion, isn't it?"
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Posted: Tue Oct 13, 2009 4:38 am
P e t e r - W i n t e r sPeter blushed a fierce dark red and remained quiet. He didn't quite know what to think, partly because he didn't know for sure what his feelings towards Eduard was, nor did he know what Eduard's feelings were for him. And now was the opportune moment to find out. Struggling with the words, he finally stammered, "E-Eduard... D-do you l-love me?" He didn't look at Eduard as he spoke, feeling way too self conscious to do so. He just stared down at the cup of tea in his hands and studied the swirling patterns that the steam made.L a d y - R o s a l i n e
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Posted: Tue Oct 13, 2009 3:53 pm
"I'm not going to say it's love, Peter." Eduard whispered, his voice sounding positively depressing.
In truth, his own confusion hurt, far more than he wanted to let on.
"I like you... I like you being here. I like you watching over me how you did while I was sick. I... I felt a familiarity with you, like you were supposed to be there." he sighed, running a hand through his hair shakily. "But I don't want to say that it's love... I don't want to because I don't know."
(((I think our PMs got lost)))
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Posted: Tue Oct 13, 2009 4:43 pm
P e t e r - W i n t e r sPeter was confused at his own reactions. Part of him had hoped that Eduard would say yes, just because then he would no longer be just a convenience, but another part of him wondered just how he would react if Eduard really did say yes. He didn't feel like he loved Eduard, or at least he was in the same situation of not knowing as Eduard was.
Peter still felt a stabbing pain in his chest when Eduard replied, it going to his head as basically: I just kissed you because I needed to kiss someone, and you were right there. He hung his head, not sure what to say, and eventually opted to remain quiet. Nothing that he would say could make things less complicated. But the pain was evident in his eyes. He felt used.((Didn't I send my reply? Maybe I didn't... I'll check right after this.)) L a d y - R o s a l i n e
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Posted: Tue Oct 13, 2009 5:00 pm
There was silence between the two men for a long time.
Without glancing over his shoulder, Eduard spoke softly.
He knew that Peter was upset.
Could feel the tension in the air...
"I told you I was selfish. Now you understand." the Marquess whispered.
'But it felt like the right thing to do...'
'Then why is it coming back to bite you in the a**?'
'I like him there... he feels RIGHT being there, being here...'
'Because he's convenient?'
'I don't know...'
Each thought slipped into the next until it was an endless stream of doubts and questions.
"I'm sorry..." Eduard whispered, afraid to turn around.
Afraid to see the pain that he knew would be in Peter's eyes.
Afraid of any tears that he might have caused...
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Posted: Tue Oct 13, 2009 5:36 pm
P e t e r - W i n t e r sAnd Eduard did cause tears. Peter tried to prevent them, but they just spilled out on their own accord. He wasn't a loud crier; barely any sound came out as tears slowly came down his cheeks save the occasional hiccup. He didn't know why he was so hurt by Eduard's statement. He still stubbornly stuck to the fact that Eduard wasn't selfish. He's supposed to love Rosaline, so it's only natural that there would be something for the actor too... Even if it's really nothing... He tried to reason his pain away, not even sure why he felt such pain. Being used wasn't that bad. He tried his best to reason that he wasn't a tool, but it eventually came back to him that he was a tool in everything having to do with Eduard. He had relieved Eduard's craving for some form of sexual contact, and he was also here for Eduard to use as part of his plan to lie to his father. In the end, Peter was nothing more than convenient. Eduard had said it himself.
When he felt all the tears drain out of him, he didn't feel any better, but at least he had reasoned enough of it away temporarily that he could smile again. Actors were always good at hiding their true selves, for that was the basic definition of an actor.L a d y - R o s a l i n e
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Posted: Tue Oct 13, 2009 5:49 pm
The Marquess hadn't made a single move toward Peter as the actor cried. He could hear him... could almost feel the sadness rolling from him in waves...
But when Peter started to smile...
Eduard was there, standing behind him and wrapping his arms around the actor from behind.
"Don't..." the young man whispered, leaning his forehead against the top of Peter's head from behind. "Don't force a smile... please... don't..." Eduard spoke, his voice tinged with barely controlled emotion. "I'm sorry. I'm so sorry..."
It was as if Eduard himself could start crying at any moment.
And then it happened...
A tear escaped his crafted mask and slid down his cheek, eventually landing in Peter's hair.
Eduard wanted to tell him to forget everything. He wanted to say he was sorry again. He wanted things to go back to how they had been that morning.
But the Marquess knew... if he tried to speak... he would break.
(((My poor Eduard is afraid of losing someone important to him... how sweet!)))
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