Errol McGillivray (illust. & visual storytelling) - [hiatus]

[Iyou]

Oh, yes! It is female. xd ; I didn't even think of that, but now I can see how it could be interpreted differently. She doesn't have quite of a petite face as most women, but she is female.  

[Errol McGillivray]

Iyou

Oh, yes! It is female. xd ; I didn't even think of that, but now I can see how it could be interpreted differently. She doesn't have quite of a petite face as most women, but she is female.

It's not that. You'd have to change a lot to make her passable as a male. It's just that I see a lot of people say, "It's a boy emo " when you help them fix a girl. And of course, people assume my tauren boy is a girl. (Even though that's kind of the point. He's a 'trap' character, so to speak.)  

[Errol McGillivray]

First, I'd like to say that the changes I'd make are all very subtle and otherwise, I think the drawing is spot on so far. And of course, the eyes are to die for. I found it difficult to stop looking at them while I was doing this crit.

You have a very strong focal point with them and that's excellent. The thing is though, since the viewer's eye is gonna fall on that first and travel from there, everything has to be drawn in relation to the eyes and the viewer will notice things that aren't as being 'off'.

The major things I'd change really revolve around the nose. I find that bridge to be oversimplified and think that it would transition smoother it was more intergrated with the eyes and the head in that area. I think making that line little more convex of a curve will help that. (2)

I think the problem you saw with the mouth is that the midpoint wasn't aligned properly in relation to the nose. The midpoint of the lips is directly under that midpoint between the nostrils. (Ideally, of course.) So moving it just a tiny bit so they line up will help that. (3)

One thing to note about the mouth is that when we smile, the muscles around the mouth actually pull back and not up. (Well, at extremes the corners move up a little bit because the extreme flex of the cheeks pulls the skin.) A light smile though, is all just a matter of pulling it back. Also, try to have both sides of the mouth end around the same place in the eye above it. Unless of course, the intention is a lopsided smile/smirk/grimace. (3)

After I made these changes, I felt eyes looked off in comparison. Since the mouth and nose now match the tilt of the head a bit more, the eyes didn't look integrated. After a bit of consideration, I felt that making the lower jaw more substantial would fix this some, without taking away from her femininity. I feel that that last one was more of a personal preference than a correction though, since I know one thing that happens in a lot of anime styles is an extremely diminished female jaw. (4)

The other thing I noticed was that the head top was a little flat. It's something we all do. Just remember that the skull is very round and there needs to be room for the brain. (1)

Iyou, seriously girl, I am mesmerized by those eyes. This is really very beautiful.  

[]Pencil Fetish[]

*GRAB!*
Mine. MINE MINE MINE MINE MINE! Get away. All of you. He's mine! *hiss* - I mean! Will you be my art mentor Errol of hawtness and love and cuddles? I'll pay you and love you and make pretty-pretty bendies with you!
<.<
>.>
<3  

[Errol McGillivray]

]Pencil Fetish[

*GRAB!*
Mine. MINE MINE MINE MINE MINE! Get away. All of you. He's mine! *hiss* - I mean! Will you be my art mentor Errol of hawtness and love and cuddles? I'll pay you and love you and make pretty-pretty bendies with you!
<.<
>.>
<3

I'll make the assumption you want that mentee slot.

Alright. Sounds good. I hope you read and understand all of my intro posts. When I say that I expect you to do the things listed, I expect it every time. You can expect the same of me, as listed. Welcome aboard.  

[]Pencil Fetish[]

A link to a thread or gallery entry
Here


What you used and how long it took
Niko's Paintchat - perhaps four three hours actual sketching + an hour or so chatting. Used a cheap jamstudio tablet to sketch and draw it.

What YOU think of your piece
I was trying to prtray something of a 'relaxed' triple-fold/backsit. Somewhat extreme though not out of actual human limitations.

A 2-4 sentence self critique.
It looks sufficient. I'm getting better with linework though the torso has no definition and I think I went and played with anatomy a little TOO much here. The rib-cage is probably bent a little too much and the torso is unrealistically far past the legs. I was going for something of a back-sit/triple-fold though I think I failed terribly in portraying that.
I'm content with teh linework, the expression and the general pose. The anatomy, however, should be worked on skeletally, I believe.

 

[Errol McGillivray]

I'm working on the critique. Give me a day or so to get it all together. I think this is really good, but at the same time, there are a lot of things that can help make it more accurate and the overall image more visually balanced and "correct".
There are some issues with perspective and gesture that I think will correct some of the things that are coming across as "wrong" in the anatomy. It's gonna be a big one, so please be patient with me. In the mean time, there's something I'd like you to do for me.

From now on, when you work digitally, I want you to screencap each step in your process. Gesture, skeleton, relationships, perspective, basic shape blocking, blue lines, finished lines. These are some of the things that we look at and work on as we go through a drawing. If you stop and take a screencap, we can see what you're doing in earlier stages that might through you off for later.

Also, this is something I do when I'm at work and can't draw anything proper. I make stickfigures from contortion videos I watch on utube. I also make some up on my own. I fill pages with just those, and when I go home, I can choose one and draw it out. I like using videos rather than stills because I like to force myself not to copy so much as capture. Give it a try. Use a oval for the head ribs and pelvis, and curves/lines for everything else. It will help with your gesture. If you can make the stickman look relaxed, then you can make the figure you draw look that way. However, for now, try it in profile so we can see what the body is doing relative to each part.

These don't have to be clean, but the scan/photo should be clear so I can see the lines. I rarely use a pencil for these, but instead just use whatever pen I'm using at work. It helps not to be able to change lines once you make them. (I'd prefer if you did them off the computer so you can do them anywhere and get a feel for it with your hand. If you have no means to transfer it to the computer, then yeah, do them that way.) Also, do you have msn? I'd like to give you opencanvas 1.1. I use a later version of oc, but 1.1 allows paintchat and it's also going to have a much smoother look than what you used. You can download GIMP to work with your scans. It's the same as photoshop, only free.)  

[]Pencil Fetish[]

For that particular picture I did actually screencap one of the steps. I had to re-start my computer and didn't want to lose it if someone erased it while I was gone.
http://img394.imageshack.us/img394/9193/icaraswl2.png

Okay, so half of my skeleton got erased. =_=;

For MSN, I have that, I also do have oC1.1 and Photoshop. I've used the gimp but it confused me. 'Just liekphotoshop' my a**. oC doesn't give me pressure control with my tablet however. None of them do. However, Imay be buying a tablet off of a friend as she upgraded to Vista and it doesn't work.
It's a Wacom Graphire 1 but it's butter than a $15 piece of junk that I use. XD

I'll also try and buy a cheap scanner this month. The one that I was using is completely defunct now. It just scans yellow no matter what. D:

And for Paintchatting. If my tablet doesn't work in oC, a friend of mine happens to have a Paintchat that he's pretty much 'given' top me for free use. So long as he is online, I can kick him in the arse and he'll boot it up. heart  

[Errol McGillivray]

You can scan yellow and change the colors in photoshop. But yeah, I see what you mean.

Hm, that's odd. My tablet pressure works with it. I think. I never really paid attention. I just don't use full on black. I draw in shades of grey to simulate a pencil.

Anyways, I'll take a look. I have a lot to do this weekend, so I will have to work on your critique in bits and pieces. It should be done by monday though. Normally, I'm not this slow, but I have midterms. (And I'm failing my classes. xd )

Try doing that thing I mentioned though, just drawing gestures in the mean time anyway. Do it digitally if you have to.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZfK_mv1hXHI
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dyeNKhn90Bo&mode=related&search=
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8CVeUnpcWAA
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uGXnC18nlTg&mode=related&search=

Some are men, some are women. Knock yourself out. biggrin  

[Errol McGillivray]

Reserved for videos. Will link in the resources

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=E1iyaA9NIq0
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ghCWB57Lo-g
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mm2WNkpnM6g
http://www.youtube.com/watch?search=&mode=related&v=-iL0OZXM7SM
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8uaVXmWEN-c
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AGMy-epXCoU
xd
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZfK_mv1hXHI
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dyeNKhn90Bo&mode=related&search=
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8CVeUnpcWAA
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uGXnC18nlTg&mode=related&search=
http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=-2860982814242352995&q=gymnast&hl=en
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8nEsgpGJbr4&mode=related&search=
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CwTQQM3y0fU&mode=related&search=
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lEGiHfLf2o8&mode=related&search=
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7ii4jGhwblo&mode=related&search=
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=--4pQX-jnX0  

[]Pencil Fetish[]

Yeah, but your tablet is probably a Wacom, not a Jamstudio. The company doesn't even exist any more. XD They went defunct in, like, 2000?  

[Iyou]

Ack, I read your critique a few days ago and totally forgot to respond to it. Things have been kind of crazy for me lately. x_x;

I totally see what you mean about the nose and mouth now - that's a huge help! I'll try to work in the stuff with the jawline too, but maybe keep the bottom of the chin a little rounder than you suggested. I dunno, maybe it'll look much better on the actual sketch than in the redline.

*gush* You give the best critiques, Errol. mrgreen  

[Errol McGillivray]

I made the jaw a little more square than intended, but you see what I mean. I'm glad I was able to help.


PencilFetish, I'm looking to seeing those gesture drawings. I paid a visit to my dance teacher today. We had ten years of catching up to do, so I'm 10 hours behind in my homework. Still, I'm glad I went. So yeah.... I'll have your critique early next week.  

[]Pencil Fetish[]

I did them last night on my bed. No internets for a few days so I had no references. It's so strange to see a sheet with more than one figure on it. And stick-figures too. D:  

[Errol McGillivray]

You'll grow to love the look of a sheet full of figures doing different things. In time, it will just flow and your doodles with put your finished lineart to shame. that's something I noticed in the last several months.
Right now, you're just getting used to things.

Definitely use the reference when you can though. Things like this are anatomy and mechanics intensive. Anyway, I look forward to seeing them. I'm sure they'll look great.

Once I look at them, I'll put together a gesture tutorial based on where you're at. (Gesture is one of my favorite parts. Can you tell?)