[PRP] a split focus (ezra & jeremiah)

[shibrogane]

Ezra said, "It would follow. If I'm here, it's possible for her to be here, too. She's probably in a similar condition, as well."

azuredreams

 

[azuredreams]

"... unlike you, however, she does not remember any part of the Court. She is, for all intents and purposes, the young woman she appears to be with an exception here or there." Jeremiah leaned to look at the table, to read briefly. It had been a long time since he had looked at such, though he remembered the rare evening of playing piano for July and Sept.

shibrogane

 

[shibrogane]

"That... would also follow," said Ezra.

Wait what.

"The Sorrowful One hollowed out the girl I knew and made her a vessel for the Court's needs. As Ascencion Shore is the otherworld, Melany is the Court. When separated from herself, of course what was once there would flood back in."

azuredreams

 

[azuredreams]

That got Jeremiah's attention.

"As I was told, Mi- Noeh tried to attach it to a spell schema but for some reason it attached to her friend instead and-" He let out a breath. "Twisted her on the inside." Yet it also gave shape to the Court as they knew it.

shibrogane

 

[shibrogane]

Ezra gave Jeremiah an odd look. "It didn't just twist her," he said. "The Melany who was my patron was nothing like the Melany I loved. They didn't even look the same."

azuredreams

 

[azuredreams]

Jeremiah might have opened his mouth to say not my words but what Ezra said next was enough to make him close his mouth. It took him a moment to gather himself, his expression having gone blank as he processed.

It was not that Ezra had been with Melany, he had seen pictures from 1969, nor was it that he loved her. No, it was the fact that she had tithed him. That was-

He did not know.

"No, I imagine not. The Spinel Lady and Melany may as well be two different people." His postured had shifted, his shoulders rolling before he recognized the action and stopped himself. "As I said, I was under the impression that she was not the intended target. It was meant to be a spell schema ..."

His world still reeled a little.

"We're looking for the charter," Jeremiah said quietly, "to change the Court but ... would that change her as well?"

shibrogane

 

[shibrogane]

"There was nothing of her left," said Ezra, a little dully. "And as far as I'm concerned, nothing of her is left now. It's possible that, were the Court changed, she would change in response. Can you live with changing someone against their will, Jeremiah? Permanently?"

azuredreams

 

[azuredreams]

Jeremiah blinked, slowly, before he responded. "She already was once. You stated it yourself. Nothing of her was left and what she is now, outside of the Court, may be remnants at it's best of someone who's not been seen for ages. If it's an outcome of change, then so be it."

There was closure in this that he could see, for those who had been tithed by Melany. For Shiloh, for Thorne, for the countless tithes that had failed and served as fetches.

Were he not willing, had he paused to question himself about it, then he would have not been- Well, he would not have been the Jeremiah that came out of his tithing.

shibrogane

 

[shibrogane]

"But she's still a person," said Ezra. "Two wrongs don't make a right. Nuking someone's personality, mind, memories, twice doesn't make the first or the second violation less so." He frowned at his composition, at his tea. "There is no guarantee that the person you get from this will be someone worth knowing. They might be worse. That would be on your shoulders, if they were."

He'd wanted her dead. He still did.

"Killing her would be cleaner. But it would destroy the Court completely, and likely the people you're trying to save as well."

azuredreams

 

[azuredreams]

"No," Jeremiah agreed quietly, "it does not." For all that he could say so be it, Ezra likely knew better. Consent was something important to him, something he valued above all other things- To strip it away, to potentially make it worse- It was close to unspeakable for him.

This was far too like when he had been in Ezra's study, a debate broken out over how to handle an affair brought forward and to force him to look at it from all angles. Including the ones he did not recognize.

Yet he was still willing to do so if it was a step necessary.

"It is still something that may need to be done and I have to be ready to do that. Never mind that we do not know what damage would be caused by destroying the Court. More harm could come from that than changing one person." One for many; it was ages old at this point. "... and what the Court has become, what it is, is not something that we are happy with. Perhaps if we could get Melany to understand, if we could relieve her of the burden, then that would be a path to consider." Except that they would have to delve into the magic that created it and that was something that needed looking into.

shibrogane

 

[shibrogane]

"I have never agreed with the argument that the good of the one ought to be sacrificed for the good of the many," said Ezra. "It sloughs off your responsibility to save all that you can. You chose that responsibility when you agreed to be tithed to me. Even if you are forced to make that choice, to sacrifice the one, if there is no other way. That is a failing in you, a failure in your duty, and it must be recognized as such."

He sighed. "Melany is a lost cause. It is cleaner, as I said, and kinder to her, to end her life before she causes more damage. Before people become attached to the woman she was before."

azuredreams

 

[azuredreams]

"I am aware that it's a failure and a shortcoming." Jeremiah's hand flicked, honestly at a loss because while part of him clung to the Court, perhaps it would be better to destroy it. "I would prefer to save everyone, Ezra, you know this." It was indecision and inaction that had lead him to Ezra in the first place, not knowing where to step because he had wanted to save everyone and failed but at least through his time within his house he knew he could not freeze anymore.

"Do you know what it will cause? If that's done? Because as far as I know, that's already happened. People have grown to know her as this young woman, not the Spinel Lady. Bonds are forming, attachments made ..." He shook his head.

shibrogane

 

[shibrogane]

"No," said Ezra, shortly. "I don't. You destroyed Dies. The All-Seeing was destroyed. When you came to me, you were looking for any way to destroy the Enemy. You begged me to show you the Enemy so you would know it enough to kill it."

He shook his head. "Emotional pain fades. The world will be better if she's destroyed and they will understand that, eventually."

azuredreams

 

[azuredreams]

It was not so strange that Jeremiah wore a neutral face and he slipped into it easily enough. More so after his time with Ezra. His head tilted, just slightly, as he studied the young man that was not the Burning Man but still [i}Father all the same.

"What I knew then is not what I know now and nothing is ever as obvious and I simply want to find the truth; to see all us free from these cycles." It was, if anything, not the point at the moment. Jeremiah had sunk into this role he had made for himself, made the Court and other ashdown something he prioritized, and that was not surprising in the end.

For a moment he was tempted to ask why Ezra had not done so but then he stopped himself. The answer was there if he thought about it. (Would he be able to kill someone he loved? Even if they were so far removed from them?) Instead, he asks, something else entirely. "Do you know who her patron was? Who brought her up into the Court?"

shibrogane

 

[shibrogane]

Ezra shook his head. "She said it was Renard. But Renard was never a noble. Such a thing wouldn't be possible. But the other option is..." He paused, an unnatural reticence coming over his features. Well, not unnatural: he must have worn such an expression when Jeremiah asked to see the face of the Enemy. It had been consumed by the flames.

"It isn't an answer you'd like."

azuredreams