[PRP] TKO (shiloh & jeremiah)

[Melancholies]

Shiloh nodded, and then nodded again as the server came back to drop off their drinks. He reached for the chocolate milk greedily, holding it between both of his hands as he took a sip. "They were just tryin' to save their friends."

Jeremiah's gaze didn't go unnoticed, but Shiloh still couldn't help glancing away at the mention of the key. He was still admittedly new to the principal thing (and Micheal hadn't given him a whole lot of direction in their brief meeting), so he wondered if there was anything new that he could do as the key, but... he shrugged, nodded again, took another sip in silent agreement.

"Yeah, I've talked with them." He was focused on the glass in front of him now, licking remnants of chocolate from his lips. "During the sunrise, right after we came out of the void. Like, you remember seeing her right? And then she was gone?"

He twirled the pen around in circles on the table.

"They're different now."

azuredreams

 

[azuredreams]

"Yes, Liam's told me as much and I've-" Jeremiah shook his head. There was no need to admit that he had been caught up in things that he had missed something that should've been so obvious. People were still dying and he hadn't gotten it then.

The glance away the mention of the key was noted. Yet he was more interested, for the moment, in the way that Shiloh was talking about Sunny. The use of them wasn't unnoticed.

"Different how? America mentioned meeting as well." Along with Heliodora, which if Shiloh had also seen Sunny after everything-

Melancholies

 

[Melancholies]

"I 'unno, just... different." He shifted at the mention of America too, especially knowing that she was involved as well. Who was the third? He supposed he could always ask Sonny, but, "They looked different. Acted kinda different. More human."

He sighed. "They're caged now. We caged them." He started to pick at his nails a little bit, ignoring his drink, "They said we can free them, but—"

azuredreams

 

[azuredreams]

"They," Jeremiah replied, because the usage was noted, "were already more human. Eating food and everything so you mean more than that but ..." His fingers tapped at the table. "Shiloh, how different?" Wild hair and hoodies and sometimes too many teeth in a mouth that shouldn't have that many.

That was Sunny.

Yet that they were caged, that Sunny was-

"That isn't- I don't know if I agree with being caged. Yes, there was something going on and it needed to be repaired but caged?"

Melancholies

 

[Melancholies]

"Well, yeah, but—" He found it hard to get his words in order, his thoughts aligned, "The mannerisms, the way they act, it's—I don't know..."

He took a deep breath. "We weren't trying to cage them, but that's how it happened." Shiloh felt ashamed, his guilt starting to bleed through his proverbial sleeve, "They were breaking apart. We just wanted to try 'n stabilize them. But..." He furrowed his brow, "They don't seem to remember much from before, like who they were. They said that we—"

He cut himself off again, weighing his thoughts, his pros and his cons and his secrets. "They said they had to obey me 'n whatever I said." He sucked in a breath, "It's bullshit. Bullshit. Micheal just passes me this ******** baton and no one tells me anything—"

He was more or less ranting quietly to himself now, days upon days of pent up frustration pouring out of him like a broken dam. He'd been doing well to hold it in.

azuredreams

 

[azuredreams]

Jeremiah just listened as Shiloh got it all out and then rubbed a hand across his face. It was, in all honesty, a lot to put on the shoulders of a teenager. Even if Shiloh was a noble, even if he was strong, it was still a lot.

"Magic has a habit of doing that. Working in ways you didn't quite want it to work in or taking a different idea you had and going another way ..." He took a sip of his drink. "Yet, you've stepped in for Michael, Shiloh, and you're the key?" Because he saw the way the young man had gotten shifty-eyed at that word. "There's a lot of potential in that. You've caged her but you could, at some point, easily undo that."

Still- Shiloh was now on a different list. To be protected because he was not going to see things go down the same path.

Melancholies

 

[Melancholies]

"It's just frustrating." He said, a little dreary, maybe melodramatic. "You're handed all these things without much direction. I hate rushing in blind, but it's all I've done so far." Now he was playing with his hands again, picking his nails, rubbing his wrists through his sleeves, mildly uncomfortable.

"I don't want to let anyone down. I haven't told anyone other'n Jamie." His eyes glittered with something caught between anger and pain, "S'funny, cause I wanted to get involved to protect him in the first place, but now I feel like I'm the one dragging him deeper into s**t." He laughed out a sound that dripped with self loathing, "Christ I hate this s**t sometimes."

"I mean, I accept this, I asked for it so it's my problem." Being responsible was hard, "It just sucks. It's like I'm hurting s**t more than I'm helping it."

azuredreams

this got kinda sad uh oops

 

[azuredreams]

"Shiloh," Jeremiah's voice was quiet but firm, reassuring, "you aren't the only one that feels like that. Frequently I feel as if I'm flying by the seat of my pants." There was a small breath exhaled, a near wry laugh. "Which are also on fire."

He shook his head. "... though I am also certain that Jamie would prefer to be there right along with you than be left behind." Algie came to mind then and the fight that had happened so many months past where he had gotten in trouble for trying to protect the other too much. "Point is, I deal with that all the time, but I keep going so I can do what is necessary, and maybe find more out so that not only I am informed but others are too. It can be overwhelming but the best thing I've learned is that I'm not alone."

Melancholies

 

[Melancholies]

Shiloh didn't like to be talked down to. He especially didn't like it from adults, and even though he knew Jeremiah wasn't trying to do that, his brain was naturally hardwired. It sucked. It was years and years and years of adults trying to act like they knew what was best for him when they never even listened at all. Going against that instinct was hard.

"I..." He sucked in a breath, sighed, "I know." He wouldn't dare leave Jamie behind, but it still stung. "We're equals, Jame 'n I. We decided that a while ago." And he wouldn't do anything to tamper with it. Deep in his heart, he knew Jamie probably struggled with feelings like this too; rooted in his soul, bleeding with shame, things he could never talk about. Maybe he should sometime. "We're in it together, as much as anyone else is."

He brought his eyes back up to Jeremiah's, looking a little sullen still but also resolute. "I guess all anyone can do is try..." The way he said it made it sound like a cop-out answer, but he didn't seem willing to elaborate on it any further. This discussion turned heart-to-heart was not what he was looking for. Grabbing his glass of milk, he gave it a halfhearted sip. "S'all we can do."

azuredreams

 

[azuredreams]

"I suppose what I am really getting at, without the spiel, is ..." Jeremiah's hand flicked in the air a moment. "Even I ******** it all up. Spectacularly. Just don't let anyone know," he said dryly, "or my image will be ruined."

His shoulders rolled, a drink taken. Somewhere along the way apparently the server decided to bring them sweet potato fries and a dipping sauce. There was no complaint from him. "Though I am the first to admit that trying doesn't feel like enough when we're blind in a lot of this. Magic is more common now but we still have to know where to look and who to look too." A huff. "Even the Court doesn't truly come with a manual despite the trials involved." Nothing more than be a guide for others, those to be looked towards.

Me1ancholies

 

[Melancholies]

"Well of course you do." He said like it was obvious, "That's what happens when you get old."

He smiled wryly, eyes catching the basket of sweet potato fries. He reached over to eat one up, apparently undaunted as to whether or not they were even for him. "Wait," He looked up, eyes boring into him, "What'cha know about Court?"

There were a lot of topics he expected to come up when conversing with Jeremiah, but Court hadn't been one of them. Honestly it was still a touchy sort of topic since he didn't believe others to treat it with respect (given what he had to go through), but...

azuredreams

 

[azuredreams]

Jeremiah snorted, grabbing his own fry to have. He paused a moment, head tilting at Shiloh's reaction before he decided to continue on.

While he was not necessarily comfortable talking about it with some, or even letting them know, Shiloh he would. With magic freer, there was a near perpetual reflective glow to Jeremiah's eyes and it got brighter briefly before it lessened back.

"Not as much as I would like but enough to know that there are those that depend on it." His voice dropped a moment, speaking quieter. "I don't know how long I really spent in Fa- Ezra's home with the twins but it taught me about the Court and its affairs."

Melancholies

 

[Melancholies]

Shiloh chewed really slowly. Like, really slowly—like cows do when you drive by them on the sides of the road and they just munch, munch, munch...

"You're a noble." It wasn't a question when he said it. "Ezra? How long? When—"

There was a genuine concern blending in with the sheer confusion of the situation. Suddenly he didn't feel so hungry anymore.

"That..." He laughed, but it didn't sound like anything joyful, "That sucks, Mercer."

azuredreams

 

[azuredreams]

Jeremiah knew that laugh. He had made it so many times in the recent past that hearing it from Shiloh was almost as if he was hearing himself. His shoulders rolled, legs stretching a moment before he was rubbing a hand along his thigh.

Where the jagged cauterized scar was.

"Right after the ball?" he offered. That had been August. "For nearly two months." Shifting in his seat, Jeremiah's gaze flicked away and then back to Shiloh. "Here, nearly two months," a clarification, "there I'm not sure of. I lost track of time. Especially after I-" There was a look on his face, something inexplicable. "I disobeyed one of the rules, an order I failed to follow."

Melancholies

 

[Melancholies]

That laugh was probably a sign of growing up too fast. It was hard not to be cynical, and Shiloh had come a long way, but...

"Two months..." His brow furrowed. "I don't think I talked to you in that time. Or well, what would've been your fetch."

He took a deep breath, but he had a certain look of understanding. "It can be hard to tell," he started, "I was only gone for the summer, but it felt like almost a year." That place destroys you." He sounded somber, mature, not nineteen, "It rips you apart. Breaks you down. Rebuilds you. I tried like hell to run, to fight back, but you never win. Especially--"

Something glazed over in his eyes, and he paused, and then he picked up again at another tangent.

"I thought they would be done after the ball. I didn't think they'd try 'n pull that s**t for a while." And then he paused, "Was... was anyone else taken? Any others?"

azuredreams