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Posted: Mon Dec 19, 2016 11:33 pm
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There's a sharp inhale in response. This is, America has to admit to herself, not okay. Not okay at all. When she wanted choices, options, this was not what she wanted and maybe this was what Heliodora meant, about shapes that had been shifted, maybe shapes meant people too and maybe people could keep shifting if she or any of the rest wanted them to badly enough.
America's real good at wanting things, at pushing too hard, at wanting to fix things and make them a certain way and maybe a week ago she'd have said that was probably her biggest skill. Deciding she wanted a thing and then making it happen.
"Jesus wept," she breathes out gustily. "Yeah...yeah, we're gonna have to talk a lot. What I want most is for you to...be you, I wanna support your you-ness, not...push it along into...into..." she tired and there's a certain sense of horror creeping in, despite Heliodora's reassurances. "I don't wanna force you into whatever suits me. Even more, if I already have."
Swallowing, she asks, voice going small, childish and uncertain, "Are you still my friend, Sunny, in the here and now?" And she tries not to want it. Tries to fix on the fact that what matter was that she is Sunny's friend, that whatever follows can follow from that. It's so hard not to want.
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Posted: Tue Dec 20, 2016 6:06 am
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"No," America tries to argue, voice soft and heart break clear across her features. "That's not what we wanted at all, something must've gone wrong." She has to sit down, then. It wasn't okay. It wasn't okay even a bit.
But it also wasn't over, not by any means, turning to look up at Sunny, she goes on, repeating her own affirmations firmly, "It doesn't matter if you're my friend, 'cause I'm your friend and I'm sure as hell not gonna use you like a tool. What kinda a** do you take me for?"
A flush rises on her cheeks and maybe its anger and maybe it has more to do with the wet shine of her eyes. And out of the blue she' s suddenly asking, "Can you eat still? Do you have a food you like best?"
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Posted: Mon Dec 26, 2016 7:27 pm
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Posted: Mon Dec 26, 2016 7:59 pm
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America watches the space where the girl had stood. For a long, silent stretch she's almost at a peaceful sort of numb and then Bitterberry offers a quiet query and she makes a soft, keening sound that quickly turns into loud sobbing. For a long, long time she stays that way, a mess of emotion without coherent thought, just loss loss loss and a girl falling into the hole left behind.
Eventually, she'll grow aware that it was cold. The the sun was going and the door of her camper was still open. That she needed sleep. She'd plug her dead phone in to charge, and as she laid down, the series of texts queued for Sunny finally tried to send.
xshibrogane text to: sunny days from: america jones youll get this later but hey guess what im in the 60s im sleeping in a little shack and got a hella cute wardrobe 60s me is hot af ok is it magic that theres always a job at a bar when i need it
Quote: text to: id shore b glad to see u from: america jones you looked really amazing in a scary but also cool way like standing in front of a giant waterfall when it gets you near deaf but you wanna stay and just kinda behold i guess you didnt look happy though but dont worry we got this! biggrin heart when i get back and things arent scary i will tell you how cool you are did you know you had a library in you
Quote: text to: id shore b glad to see u from: america jones we saw professor algernon but he was young he was like a nerdy fetus baby he made mr b mad cause he swatted at him while was lurking about it was probably more to protect his sandwich than a thing against birds but mr b is in a big huge huff over it i wish you could see how cute his puffed up little sulk is over it
Quote: text to: id shore b glad to see u from: america jones i went and got a tattoo you know theyre illegal here?! illegal timetravel tattoos make it extra cool im gonna start poppin my collars its of a bluejay and when mr b saw he lost his mind hes so happy and smug sometimes he does this little bobble dance and im not sure if its a bluejay thing or if hes copying my celebration booty dance but its the best
Quote: text to: id shore b glad to see u from: america jones its been a few days and honest to god i have no idea about this veil or tear business but im keeping my ear to the ground and theres a concert today so maybe therell be some clue just hang in there hun im a hella good seamstress well not the fancy sort but i can patch a hole like nobodys business so maybe ill see you tomorrow and get to brag about how cool i am
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