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 Posted: Sun Sep 28, 2008 6:34 pm
lenoree I probably should have never made that post, because now, even though I asked not to be judged, that's exactly what everyone on here is doing. you wish not to be judged? yet it's alright for you to judge others before you meet them. I have a question for you if you're against black/white relationships does that mean your against Native American/white relationships? or Japanese/white, Japanese/black, Chinese/black, Chinese/white, Native American/French the list goes on. but are these relationships judged just as harshly by you?
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Posted: Sun Sep 28, 2008 11:16 pm
My grandmother is the same way. Infact, there are a great many people I know who feel this way. You'd be surprised in many areas. They just aren't that vocal. I don't usually agree with it simply because I was raised that way for so long that it just doesn't seem right no matter how hard I try, but I do judge on personal merits rather then color and don't change in my interaction with them at all. Much of it has to do with the Bible and genetics. I simply do not agree that all races were created equal (no I don't mean go enslave everyone!). I'm just saying, there are definite differences between races (in their purer forms) when it comes to things like aging, fitness, and yes, brain size. This just comes from liking science a bit too much. In my love of debating religion, I have been told of the 'wandering tribes' often. My grandma insits that blacks are animals. But that's granma. She's a bible-thumper. My ex's step-dad hated me because I wasn't Mexican. And Maximillion, a very friendly black man I know, nearly killed his son when he found out the boy was dating a white girl (which was wierd, because he's so nice to everyone you'd think it wasn't an issue- but don't get him started on 'fresh-water' blacks (that's the nice term compared to what he used)). it crosses all lines. Just wanted to put a non 'holy-cow there's something wrong with you ' answer out there. Not everyone embraces the idea whole-heartedly, and not all those who don't are in need of psychiatric help.
That said, I do agree that you should at least give her a chance. You never know, you might love her!
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Posted: Mon Sep 29, 2008 5:08 am
You are more than entitled to be opposed to dating outside of your skin color. However, you do not have the right to impose your beliefs on anyone else.
You don't want anyone to judge you, but you think you can tell by the color of someone's skin or their nationality of origin whether they are "suitable" for someone of your "own kind" to be dating.
And I hate to tell you this sweetie...but odds are very good that you, yourself are not purely of white European descent. Most Americans have a Native American ancestor, or an African American ancestor or an Asian ancestor, this is why they call America "the great melting pot."
Your half-brother's wife is an amazingly brave woman to even consider attending any event to which you've been invited. After all, you are the one with the problem, not her.
Get over yourself. You don't have the right to dictate any of this. If you shut your family out because of this, then you are the one who loses. After all, you will lose your entire family, and they will only lose a hatemonger who can't accept that other people have the right to live their lives as they see fit.
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Posted: Mon Sep 29, 2008 5:23 am
charamath Much of it has to do with the Bible and genetics. I simply do not agree that all races were created equal (no I don't mean go enslave everyone!). I'm just saying, there are definite differences between races (in their purer forms) when it comes to things like aging, fitness, and yes, brain size. This just comes from liking science a bit too much. i'm sorry, but if you really studied genetics and biology you would know that there can be more genetic differences between you and another person of your own race than a person of another. of the 0.1% differences in single-nucleotide polymorphisms within populations, only about 7-8% of that 0.1% is race-related. most biologists/geneticists will tell you that there is no significant roots for the concept of race in biology.
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Posted: Mon Sep 29, 2008 12:48 pm
immabee charamath Much of it has to do with the Bible and genetics. I simply do not agree that all races were created equal (no I don't mean go enslave everyone!). I'm just saying, there are definite differences between races (in their purer forms) when it comes to things like aging, fitness, and yes, brain size. This just comes from liking science a bit too much. i'm sorry, but if you really studied genetics and biology you would know that there can be more genetic differences between you and another person of your own race than a person of another. of the 0.1% differences in single-nucleotide polymorphisms within populations, only about 7-8% of that 0.1% is race-related. most biologists/geneticists will tell you that there is no significant roots for the concept of race in biology. Well that's not surprising. Honestly, there are massive differences physically in tiny genetic differences. Look at how close an orangatan is to us. I've talked to Biology professors who say that there are certain traits in certain races. For instance, blacks often mature physcially faster then other races. We're all unique in our own ways. It's not bad, it's just nature. We weren't all one big mixing but for several thousand years, so it's only pratical that there would be some differences when we all started migrating.
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Posted: Tue Sep 30, 2008 4:11 pm
Alexandretta Lenoree.. Its been a few days and wondered if you have had a chance to think things through? You have received alot of very good advice from everyone here and Im sure everyone will agree, we hope that this is a very good experience for you as a person, as well as a member of the family... pushing this back to the top because I would at least like you (lenoree) to stop in to say "hi" and acknowledge the rest of the posts that were made. . .Please? how are things going?
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Posted: Tue Sep 30, 2008 8:57 pm
lenoree I have read what you all had to say and I have come to the decision that I'm going to give it a shot. I'm going to do what pretty hate machine suggested and take extra pills with me and probably pop and extra Xanax because I also have social anxiety disorder. I never did care much for Lee though, and he isn't my step brother, he is my half brother. We have the same father but different mothers. And my father isn't even sure if he is even his. I spoke with my father a little while ago and he really wants me to come. So I'm going to Grin and Bear it. And If I don't feel comfortable I will go for a walk or lock myself in a room. Thanks for not being as mean to me as I know you probably would have liked. I probably should have never made that post, because now, even though I asked not to be judged, that's exactly what everyone on here is doing. Well, I'm not a bad person just because I don't agree with inter-racial relationships. I'm not the only person out there who thinks that way. I'm just not afraid to admit it.
I don't think you should give anything a shot! I think you should dis-associate yourself with anyone who wants to make you do or believe something contrary to your own beliefs.
You should stay home and lock yourself away if that makes you happy. You might also want to consider moving to an area of the country where you won't have to put up with the darkies marrying or dating your peoples. Wisconsin has quite a few racist communities where you'd probably be more comfortable. If you don't like the cold, there are a lot of biggots in Texas. You can listen to racist radio there too... KKKK fm. I don't know the frequency but I'm sure you'll find it.
Growing up with prejudice parents is a lame a** excuse! I grew up with prejudice parents too but I have a brain of my own. People are the same regardless of the quantity of melanin in their skin. If I get stabbed in the heart I'll bleed red blood and die just the same as an Asian, Mexican, Canadian, African, Jew, Italian, Atheist, Budist or YOU!
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Posted: Tue Sep 30, 2008 9:15 pm
Malheureux lenoree I have read what you all had to say and I have come to the decision that I'm going to give it a shot. I'm going to do what pretty hate machine suggested and take extra pills with me and probably pop and extra Xanax because I also have social anxiety disorder. I never did care much for Lee though, and he isn't my step brother, he is my half brother. We have the same father but different mothers. And my father isn't even sure if he is even his. I spoke with my father a little while ago and he really wants me to come. So I'm going to Grin and Bear it. And If I don't feel comfortable I will go for a walk or lock myself in a room. Thanks for not being as mean to me as I know you probably would have liked. I probably should have never made that post, because now, even though I asked not to be judged, that's exactly what everyone on here is doing. Well, I'm not a bad person just because I don't agree with inter-racial relationships. I'm not the only person out there who thinks that way. I'm just not afraid to admit it.
I don't think you should give anything a shot! I think you should dis-associate yourself with anyone who wants to make you do or believe something contrary to your own beliefs.
You should stay home and lock yourself away if that makes you happy. You might also want to consider moving to an area of the country where you won't have to put up with the darkies marrying or dating your peoples. Wisconsin has quite a few racist communities where you'd probably be more comfortable. If you don't like the cold, there are a lot of biggots in Texas. You can listen to racist radio there too... KKKK fm. I don't know the frequency but I'm sure you'll find it.
I think there needs to be a /sarcasm there lol. I got confused in the first paragraph XD
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Posted: Tue Sep 30, 2008 9:50 pm
Juliets last kiss Malheureux lenoree I have read what you all had to say and I have come to the decision that I'm going to give it a shot. I'm going to do what pretty hate machine suggested and take extra pills with me and probably pop and extra Xanax because I also have social anxiety disorder. I never did care much for Lee though, and he isn't my step brother, he is my half brother. We have the same father but different mothers. And my father isn't even sure if he is even his. I spoke with my father a little while ago and he really wants me to come. So I'm going to Grin and Bear it. And If I don't feel comfortable I will go for a walk or lock myself in a room. Thanks for not being as mean to me as I know you probably would have liked. I probably should have never made that post, because now, even though I asked not to be judged, that's exactly what everyone on here is doing. Well, I'm not a bad person just because I don't agree with inter-racial relationships. I'm not the only person out there who thinks that way. I'm just not afraid to admit it.
I don't think you should give anything a shot! I think you should dis-associate yourself with anyone who wants to make you do or believe something contrary to your own beliefs.
You should stay home and lock yourself away if that makes you happy. You might also want to consider moving to an area of the country where you won't have to put up with the darkies marrying or dating your peoples. Wisconsin has quite a few racist communities where you'd probably be more comfortable. If you don't like the cold, there are a lot of biggots in Texas. You can listen to racist radio there too... KKKK fm. I don't know the frequency but I'm sure you'll find it.
I think there needs to be a /sarcasm there lol. I got confused in the first paragraph XD I'm not being sarcastic. I meant every word. She should stick to her racists guns. If she a prejudice b***h then she should be proud of it! She shouldn't cave to pressure from anyone. The world needs racist pricks, male and female.
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Posted: Wed Oct 01, 2008 12:58 am
Alexandretta lenoree . Thanks for not being as mean to me as I know you probably would have liked. I probably should have never made that post, because now, even though I asked not to be judged, that's exactly what everyone on here is doing. Well, I'm not a bad person just because I don't agree with inter-racial relationships. I'm not the only person out there who thinks that way. I'm just not afraid to admit it. With all due respect, no one here has done any judging, nor commented on it to the point of being cruel. And, to say "as I know you probably would have liked" in reference to being mean... That is completely unacceptable and uncalled for. People here showed you a serious level of patience by admitting they had to step back before they said anything that would have been truly mean. You need to recognize this and to not acknowledge that is wrong. You passed a level of pre-determined judgement by saying everyone here is judging you. That in itself was wrong as well. While I commend you for having to courage to share this, and Im sure you had a personal conflict of interest in wondering how this would be handled, you have to remember this very important element:In expressing any opinion, you will ALWAYS have people who dont believe what you (or anyone) express. People have the right to say "I disagree".... but, how it is communicated is much more important. I stepped back and read every post on this topic so far, and let me say... I feel everyone's emotions, including yours, in these posts... Everyone, and I mean everyone who has responded has done so with the utmost highest level of restraint and expressed in a very careful and calculated manner. They are to be commended for handling themselves extremely well. This is NOT an easy subject matter. I am not going to pass judgement on you here, but I will definitely say this.... You really should consider some serious psychological help. To have this much disgust towards inter-racial relationships tells me there is something you have not shared with people due to being rather guarded.... I detect you may have had experienced something in your life that has put you in this level of belief-system that maybe even you are unaware of, perhaps on a more subconscious level. This level is not healthy at all... in fact I wonder if this is contributing towards your anxiety disorders? You mentioned social anxiety issues, and I cant help but picture something here that may have contributed to your beliefs.... This is not judgement, this is more of what I am detecting from your posts. Behavioral patterns is something I am able to pick up on from my line of work... and I must admit, you have me concerned on a very genuine level. The most important thing to always remember, and this goes along with work, school, doctor office visits, every and all facets of life: We all walk with two feet, we all have the same color blood that runs in our veins, we all share the same human characteristics of one another regardless of where our roots may have been grounded. We have all the same impulses and desires, always wanting to do more for one another, and want whats best for ourselves and each other... regardless of where we come from, what our skin color is, lifestyle, nationality is or whether we are from a disadvantaged or advantaged lifestyle. I have a cousin (she is the second oldest) who is married to a man who is half-black half-phillipino. My Korean brother (by marriage and I dont believe in calling him Stepbrother, he is my brother), who was adopted by his Italian father, is married to his second Mexican wife. He has a beautiful daughter from his first marriage who has the benefit of being in a blended heritage. My Korean sister, may she rest in peace was also adopted by the same, was dating a few black young men in college, Harvard to be exact... My mother and her second husband had my sister Sandra, who is half French, Half Italian. My whole family immigrated to the United States from Normandy. I am from both sides of the family, 100% pure French. My first husband was half-Native american and half british. My soon-to-be second husband is a self-proclaimed Mutt.. .they lost track of his nationalities by the year 1926 because of several families immigrating here from overseas... My daughter is 75% french, and 25% culturally-confused, as she likes to call it. Her father, with whom I never married, is part British, french and indian as far as we were able to research. She spends time checking out the cute and hot asian boys at school and has no problem admitting it! By just listing this in my own family, one can definitely say, we embrace life for what it is, very precious... we love our children unconditionally. I only had one relative who had a problem with my cousin marrying someone who was half-black/half phillipino, but coming from a generation (he was born in 1930) that had even more strict family beliefs, this was to be expected. He never once denied them access to his home, he never stopped them from coming to his home when he had family barbeques, because all that mattered to him was that so long as he treats her right, helps to take care of the home, and never lays a hand on her (he had 36 grandchildren, 30 of us are girls), he will accept him for the man he is as long as he respects her, protects her and loves her unconditionally. My grandfather raised me to believe that you can have your differences so long as it doesnt interfere and cause someone else's misery. If you find that you are miserable over something that someone else has done that you dont like.. you need to ask yourself "How does this affect you and what did it do to you?" If you cant answer yourself that very question, then, there truly isnt a reason to be miserable if it has nothing to do with you. I dont see anyone here setting you up for anything. Again, you mentioned you have a social anxiety disorder. Sounds like to me your family is trying to include you not torture you. Even though your parents didnt say it, they arent setting you up... if they know you, they know they didnt want to get you mad or upset. I give your sister alot of respect and commendation for trying to help you realize it is a family visit.. I dont see any set up at all. The reason why your sister cant accept you for your beliefs is more valid. Perhaps your anxieties are creating a barrier that allows you to stop up in your tracks..a protective barrier from something that 'might' happen, and not just your strong disbelief in interracial marriages. What we are taught by our parents, as you have mentioned, you had racial parents who referred to black people as the n-word, that they were bad people, is not always the right way to be taught. Your parents to me, perhaps have grown out of that world of hatred and have learned to embrace that they see differences as an accepted way of life? How do you truly know your Mother 'cant stand Lee as it is' when you are never there? Things have changed in the last 20-30, maybe even 40 years. You dont always have to listen to what your parents teach you, is the bottom line. My parents were drunken bums who did nothing but beat the s**t out of us, tried teaching us to hate in the worse way possible... as I raise my hand, I was taught so much negativity as a child, became an alcoholic at the age of 13, the victim of so much hatred that, 21 years later, I am the exact opposite of what my parents are.... Im not an alcoholic, Im not a child abuser, I enjoy different cultures and embrace changes and differences, and think it is wonderful to hear of people getting married, and not ever think about "is she white?", because it doesnt matter to me, the actions of others do not affect me because it has absolutely nothing to do with me to begin with. I hope some day, you can set yourself free of the anxieties that you have. It will help to free your mind, your soul and your life. You will then gain a better mind-set and be more open to things that can be different and glorious... Your brother (I know you said half, but I personally dont believe in it that) is married to a woman that he loves, and she loves him.. and that is all that should matter.
Well said. I feel the same.
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Posted: Wed Oct 01, 2008 3:17 pm
Malheureux Juliets last kiss Malheureux lenoree I have read what you all had to say and I have come to the decision that I'm going to give it a shot. I'm going to do what pretty hate machine suggested and take extra pills with me and probably pop and extra Xanax because I also have social anxiety disorder. I never did care much for Lee though, and he isn't my step brother, he is my half brother. We have the same father but different mothers. And my father isn't even sure if he is even his. I spoke with my father a little while ago and he really wants me to come. So I'm going to Grin and Bear it. And If I don't feel comfortable I will go for a walk or lock myself in a room. Thanks for not being as mean to me as I know you probably would have liked. I probably should have never made that post, because now, even though I asked not to be judged, that's exactly what everyone on here is doing. Well, I'm not a bad person just because I don't agree with inter-racial relationships. I'm not the only person out there who thinks that way. I'm just not afraid to admit it.
I don't think you should give anything a shot! I think you should dis-associate yourself with anyone who wants to make you do or believe something contrary to your own beliefs.
You should stay home and lock yourself away if that makes you happy. You might also want to consider moving to an area of the country where you won't have to put up with the darkies marrying or dating your peoples. Wisconsin has quite a few racist communities where you'd probably be more comfortable. If you don't like the cold, there are a lot of biggots in Texas. You can listen to racist radio there too... KKKK fm. I don't know the frequency but I'm sure you'll find it.
I think there needs to be a /sarcasm there lol. I got confused in the first paragraph XD why the heck would the world need more strife?
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Posted: Wed Oct 01, 2008 3:35 pm
Juliets last kiss Malheureux Juliets last kiss Malheureux lenoree I have read what you all had to say and I have come to the decision that I'm going to give it a shot. I'm going to do what pretty hate machine suggested and take extra pills with me and probably pop and extra Xanax because I also have social anxiety disorder. I never did care much for Lee though, and he isn't my step brother, he is my half brother. We have the same father but different mothers. And my father isn't even sure if he is even his. I spoke with my father a little while ago and he really wants me to come. So I'm going to Grin and Bear it. And If I don't feel comfortable I will go for a walk or lock myself in a room. Thanks for not being as mean to me as I know you probably would have liked. I probably should have never made that post, because now, even though I asked not to be judged, that's exactly what everyone on here is doing. Well, I'm not a bad person just because I don't agree with inter-racial relationships. I'm not the only person out there who thinks that way. I'm just not afraid to admit it.
I don't think you should give anything a shot! I think you should dis-associate yourself with anyone who wants to make you do or believe something contrary to your own beliefs.
You should stay home and lock yourself away if that makes you happy. You might also want to consider moving to an area of the country where you won't have to put up with the darkies marrying or dating your peoples. Wisconsin has quite a few racist communities where you'd probably be more comfortable. If you don't like the cold, there are a lot of biggots in Texas. You can listen to racist radio there too... KKKK fm. I don't know the frequency but I'm sure you'll find it.
I think there needs to be a /sarcasm there lol. I got confused in the first paragraph XD why the heck would the world need more strife? The world doesn't need more strife, just some strife. It helps people appreciate the good things that they have in life, no matter how small or seemingly insignificant.
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Posted: Fri Oct 03, 2008 7:48 am
Malheureux Juliets last kiss Malheureux Juliets last kiss Malheureux lenoree I have read what you all had to say and I have come to the decision that I'm going to give it a shot. I'm going to do what pretty hate machine suggested and take extra pills with me and probably pop and extra Xanax because I also have social anxiety disorder. I never did care much for Lee though, and he isn't my step brother, he is my half brother. We have the same father but different mothers. And my father isn't even sure if he is even his. I spoke with my father a little while ago and he really wants me to come. So I'm going to Grin and Bear it. And If I don't feel comfortable I will go for a walk or lock myself in a room. Thanks for not being as mean to me as I know you probably would have liked. I probably should have never made that post, because now, even though I asked not to be judged, that's exactly what everyone on here is doing. Well, I'm not a bad person just because I don't agree with inter-racial relationships. I'm not the only person out there who thinks that way. I'm just not afraid to admit it.
I don't think you should give anything a shot! I think you should dis-associate yourself with anyone who wants to make you do or believe something contrary to your own beliefs.
You should stay home and lock yourself away if that makes you happy. You might also want to consider moving to an area of the country where you won't have to put up with the darkies marrying or dating your peoples. Wisconsin has quite a few racist communities where you'd probably be more comfortable. If you don't like the cold, there are a lot of biggots in Texas. You can listen to racist radio there too... KKKK fm. I don't know the frequency but I'm sure you'll find it.
I think there needs to be a /sarcasm there lol. I got confused in the first paragraph XD why the heck would the world need more strife?
The world doesn't need more strife, just some strife. It helps people appreciate the good things that they have in life, no matter how small or seemingly insignificant.
I can agree with the world needing a little strife, but not this type. Also, Lenoree would probably be happier if she just got over this all. It's a huge waste of time, on her part. sweatdrop
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