[Game] Ask a Silly Question, Get a Silly Answer

[Shard Of Ronin]

Back in the 19th century, the Illuminati realised that their place in the world was under threat, times were changing in a way they could not predict and so they needed to establish a new powerbase to fall back upon if their monopoly on control of the world's pigeons ever failed. To this end, they invented shoes and changed all the history books so that we thought we' always worn shoes. Using mystical arts long-forgotten they also mind-controlled the planet into never questioning this.

Since then shoes have been worn in every single place on the planet where important events were happening. Have you ever seen anyone barefoot during elections? Wars? TV quiz shows (part of their mass-media indoctrination)?

You have not. Because they are the Illuminati, and they control your life. Fnord.

*ahem*

Why does a porcupine?  

[CoyoteXendo]

because the first porcu was actually a hedgehog on steriods. he wanted to win the olympics you see. but of course he was found out and banished by the rest of the hedgehogs. and now he only has other steroid using porcus for company. and they're all depressed from losing their families and angry cuz of the roids. so they pine for the good old days. but of course there's no going back.

how does lint get under the carpet?  

[this wretched thing]

(-thinks shes inspired the long answers oO-)

Oh, I think you already know this but I'll inform you anyhow, young lady~. Under the floorboards or tiles under the carpet is a plastic spoon-dug tunnel that leads all the way to Alcatraz. That's where the ghosts wait for you to sleep after you had a long day of house cleaning before taking that dug route. Then, when the cost is clear so no one will notice the movement in the rug, they put the lint from their bellybuttons under your carpet. Damn, I hope it wasn't too expensive because it's known to make stains sometimes.

Are you my mummy?  

[Art Greylace]

Well, dearest, that's not an easily answered question. You see, bandits usually move about so much that I have no idea... wait, mummy? No, you're confusing me with 773. *sigh* He's the one wearing bunny ears. *points* But I'd have to be your poppa if he's your mummy.

Which one is Suzuki-san?
 

[xhauntedsoulx]

Why am I coughing so much? FFFFF-  

[BrokenScreamBox]

Because there's a bug in your throat that wants to get out.

Why do people have hair?  

[Art Greylace]

For you to have something to hold onto while I *&^%*( you into the matress.

Why are there no rainbow jellybeans?  

[this wretched thing]

Beanie Babies Inc have now implanted JellyBeans into their toys! They've bought at least 99.9% of the JellyBeans for their toy-making production. The remaining .1% goes to world hunger.

Can I have a million dollars?  

[After Midnight Blue]

Only if you fetch me a single hair from the head of the Dalai Lama, which he willingly gives you.

Why is the rum always gone?  

[Sacrifice Kaigen]

It's a Government conspiracy that is trying to make the poor hot dog liking people of this poor country buy more products just so they can have an equal amount of both hot dogs and buns. . . But what the poor hot dog eating people of this country don't realize is that there isn't a need to buy more than one packageof either to have an eual amount of both. . . All they need to do is give a hot dog to that poor dog standing by their feet and looking up at you with those sad, pitiful little eyes of theirs. . . Only then will they have enough of both products. . .

Why did they build a city under water?  

[this wretched thing]

The fishes that you flush down toilets aren't really dead, you know. They have to move to somewhere since you kicked them out.

Why can't we be friends, why can't we be friends?  

[Sacrifice Kaigen]

Because if you keep getting that song stuck in people's heads, no ones gonna wanna be friends with you. . .

If your head inflated to the size of five basket balls, what would you possibly do?  

[After Midnight Blue]

Because we'd all go blind if the grass was blue and the sky was green.

What exactly to retainers retain?