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 Posted: Sun Nov 27, 2005 8:19 pm
I'm not puttin' 'em down my pants, even if they offer me whole bunch of money to do it again.
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Posted: Sun Nov 27, 2005 9:48 pm
That only happens in guiles county
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Posted: Mon Nov 28, 2005 5:41 am
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Posted: Mon Dec 12, 2005 1:44 am
Chuck Norris's girlfriend once asked him how much wood a woodchuck could chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood. He then shouted, "HOW DARE YOU RHYME IN THE PRESENCE OF CHUCK NORRIS!" and ripped out her throat. Holding his girlfriend's bloody throat in his hand he bellowed, "Don't f*ck with Chuck!" Two years and five months later he realized the irony of this statement and laughed so hard that anyone within a hundred mile radius of the blast went deaf.
heart heart heart
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Posted: Mon Dec 12, 2005 3:21 am
How DARE you mock Chuck norris! scream
xp
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Posted: Mon Dec 12, 2005 8:57 am
Marty Nozz How DARE you mock Chuck norris! scream xp *calls jet li over to kick chuck's panzy a*** mrgreen
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Posted: Mon Dec 12, 2005 7:25 pm
otakujack Marty Nozz How DARE you mock Chuck norris! scream xp *calls jet li over to kick chuck's panzy a*** mrgreen That would be a good fight. However, Jet hung it up to do "philosphical movies". *Heads over to the corner to vomit.*
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Posted: Sun Jan 15, 2006 1:19 pm
Ramblings of a Retired Mind - some thoughts.
I was thinking about how a status symbol of today is those cell phones that everyone has clipped onto their belt or purse. I can't afford one. So, I'm wearing my garage door opener.
You know, I spent a fortune on deodorant before I realized that people didn't like me anyway.
I was thinking that women should put pictures of missing husbands on beer cans!
I was thinking about old age and decided that old age is 'when you still have something on the ball, but you are just too tired to bounce it.'
I thought about making a fitness movie, for folks my age, and call it "Pumping Rust."
I have gotten that dreaded furniture disease. That's when your chest is falling into your drawers!
I know, when people see a cat's litter box, they always say, "Oh, have you got a cat?" Just once I want to say, "No, it's for company!"
Employment application blanks always ask 'who is to be notified in case of an emergency.' I think you should write, "A Good Doctor!"
Why do they put pictures of criminals up in the Post Office? What are we supposed to do -- write to these men? Why don't they just put their pictures on the postage stamps so the mailmen could look for them while they deliver the mail? Or better yet, arrest them while they are taking their pictures!
I was thinking about how people seem to read the Bible a whole lot more as they get older. Then, it dawned on me, they were cramming for their finals. As for me, I'm just hoping God grades on the curve.
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Posted: Sun Feb 26, 2006 1:03 pm
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Posted: Sat Mar 04, 2006 2:54 pm
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Posted: Sun Mar 05, 2006 3:07 pm
* Wishes for an Anti-Oscar award to give to those putrid movies...
the ones you can't even give away. *
I heard that the box office for 'Brokeback Mountain'
was actually falling. Like, maybe the trailers are
the only good parts?
Sad to say, a lot of movies do seem to include their best parts in the trailers, and after that, there's maybe one or two more laughs in the whole 2 hours.
* Not suggesting that 'Brokeback Mountain' is a comedy.
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Posted: Tue Mar 21, 2006 6:08 pm
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Posted: Sat Apr 01, 2006 4:58 pm
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Posted: Tue May 09, 2006 10:06 am
ninja My brain has holes in it. eek
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Posted: Sat Jul 01, 2006 2:07 am
I Do Whatever My Rice Krispies Tell Me To
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