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Posted: Fri Dec 29, 2006 11:57 am
Anyone else have their holiday ruined by idiot relatives, who find it amusing to tease you about how you dress, your religion, e.t.c.?
I tried SOOO hard to not let it bother me, but after hearing a bunch of mean jokes about how if helped with anything, it might turn gothy. When my cousin put meat in my food (I've been vegetarian for 4 years) I just snapped and started yelling at him.
Normally I just ignore stuff like that, but it's starting to really piss me off. I never did anything to them, so why are they so mean to me?
((I realise that I sound like some whiny n00b, but I'm just tired of being treated badly))
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Posted: Fri Dec 29, 2006 4:14 pm
You're not alone. I've got some ultra-stodgy fellows in my family. They like to turn up their noses at everything I do. If I wear black? "Veru, we're not Italian." If I have to take my pills? "Only children are always spoilt and sickly." If I talk about art? "Artistic temperments belie a lack of character." And my personal favourite? Turning to my mother and saying, with an air of resignation, "She's not a very good student, is she?"
Mom's response? "I don't know. Straight A's sound pretty good to me."
rofl
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Posted: Fri Dec 29, 2006 4:45 pm
my family used to do stuff like that, but they don't do it anymore, simply because 4 years ago, I just snapped. and when I snapped, I punched the person who said what they said, and dislocated their jaw. Ever since then, they don't do it because they're scared I'll kill them. I've made the threat before, and now they believe me.
My advice, stick up for yourself, I wouldn't advise what I did, but stand up for yourself, and don't let them push you down, or look down their noses at you. Earn their grudging respect if you feel like it, but stand up for yourself.
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Posted: Fri Dec 29, 2006 8:22 pm
Thanks for the comments and advice. whee I'm normally a very passive-agressive person, so I'm trying to stick up for myself more, even though it's kinda of hard for me.
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Posted: Fri Dec 29, 2006 8:29 pm
yeah, I used to be that way, but I changed it because they got on my nerves so bad, and normally I am so against fighting it's not an issue, but when you get me going bad, I will stand up for myself and others. By words, or if it's bad enough violence, and then only cautionusly.
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Posted: Sun Dec 31, 2006 6:17 pm
For the LIFE of me, I cannae find a single reason for why I don't like hanging with my family. I can only hang with my cousin Kamal, and his mom (my aunt). My mom thinks it's because I think that I"m white, or because I"m an uncle tom. I just don't want anyone to find out that I cut myself. I can't trust them, family or not. It's just weird...
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Posted: Mon Jan 01, 2007 4:33 am
Personally, I've found that the best way to handle asstastic family members is simply to ignore them. If they don't have the courtesy to treat me like a blood relation and respect me as a human being, then as far as I'm concerned they do not consider themselves my family. And at that point, I no longer owe them any familial allegiance. No one deserves constant degradation, and I have to look after myself.
I'm lucky to have some family members who like and respect me, and actually treasure me for my oddities. They've actually supported me in my descision to estrange myself from people who left me no other choice.
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Posted: Mon Jan 01, 2007 10:34 am
idiot family ruined it for me
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Posted: Mon Jan 01, 2007 11:11 am
Veruniel Personally, I've found that the best way to handle asstastic family members is simply to ignore them. If they don't have the courtesy to treat me like a blood relation and respect me as a human being, then as far as I'm concerned they do not consider themselves my family. And at that point, I no longer owe them any familial allegiance. No one deserves constant degradation, and I have to look after myself. I'm lucky to have some family members who like and respect me, and actually treasure me for my oddities. They've actually supported me in my descision to estrange myself from people who left me no other choice. That's good (is talking about the last blurb).
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Posted: Tue Jan 02, 2007 7:26 am
My family was in particular smal this year, but my a** of a brother ruined most of it..... XP
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Posted: Tue Jan 02, 2007 2:14 pm
Well, we're no longing talking to my grandpa, who can be quite mean at times.
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Posted: Tue Jan 02, 2007 3:47 pm
Yeah, it's pretty much the same here. Im usually a passive person too, but there are times when I just want to blow. My family is pretty dense and can say the most insensitive things without even caring that the person their talking about is right in front of them. Though ignoring is a great advice, it'll only take you so far. Unless, however, you have a very very high tolerence for stupid, compassionless people like them. Just try addressing them about it in a caml fashion, and if they attack you more, THEN feel free to let loose.
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Posted: Tue Jan 02, 2007 3:58 pm
yeha me too... and when i ahve to spend time with them i feel like i am living a lie as well... i can't really tell them things i do because they are either deemed socially unacceptable or they are illegal so i have to make like i do absolutely nohting all day... it sucks a** and so did my holiday and i apparently singla handedly ruined it for somereason because my s**t head brother stole some of the money i got and he is such and "angel" that he would never do it... and i just asked if anyone had seen my stuff and then my mum and dad flew into a total frenzy saying that i was accusing people left right and center when i asked a question... wow
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Posted: Wed Jan 03, 2007 4:40 pm
There are always some in every family. It sucks when you feel they are all against, or don't try to understand you though.
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Posted: Wed Jan 03, 2007 5:42 pm
Not really... well, a bit, just because I haven't found my style of clothes yet, and are wearing a bit usual, if dark/black, clothes normally would be my guess... but I've received some stupid/rude comments...
My grandmother simply LOVES to comment on me colouring my hair black every time I'm visiting her rolleyes she's still praying I will "see the light" and become a christian again and change etc...
My mum asked once why I "suddenly had turned so "dark" and stuff... i was last year... and the only changes are the colour of my clothes and that I found new music to listen to (that I hadn't had the chance of doing when I was in elementary school...) I told her that I just found something I liked, and recognised myself in and she left it at that.
My dad is the worst though >.< everytime I'm playing music, he comments on me being a satanist... as if Linkin Park, Metallica, Moi Dix Mois etc are satanic bands... (well, I don't understand what Moi Dix Mois sings, but I highly doubt it's satanic stuff, especially after having read articles about them) and he constantly comments on me being satanic-like and so on and so on...
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