Magic, the Divine, and the medicated...

[VisasMarr]

About a year ago I joined the medicated masses in North America. Namely, those with depression and taking anti-depressants for it.
Background info:
Since the onset of my depression most recently(about 2 years ago), I have totally stalled/stopped my spiritual/magical development. That is not because I haven't wanted to, per say. But because I have not managed to gather the will required. When I do manage to muster the energy to say, use my Tarot, or do a spell, things just end up wonky. I don't even seem to have the ability to meditate any more.

ok, before I go off on a tangent. I shall pose the questions for discussion...

To medicate or not to medicate? Have you found that any magical or divine encounter you have experienced differ when you are taking medication and when you are not?

Those with depression or other mental health issues: Have you found it difficult to nearly impossible to use magic, speak to your gods, do other such things while in the midst of depression or another mental health issue?

How do you cope/move forward when in these states?

Ah, I hope these questions are not too vague. I am among those who have trouble articulating themselves. Feel free to share, or not.

Thanks to everyone for the comments and suggestions and words of encouragement!!  

[Kuroiban]

VisasMarr

About a year ago I joined the medicated masses in North America. Namely, those with depression and taking anti-depressants for it.
Background info:
Since the onset of my depression most recently(about 2 years ago), I have totally stalled/stopped my spiritual/magical development. That is not because I haven't wanted to, per say. But because I have not managed to gather the will required. When I do manage to muster the energy to say, use my Tarot, or do a spell, things just end up wonky. I don't even seem to have the ability to meditate any more.

ok, before I go off on a tangent. I shall pose the questions for discussion...

To medicate or not to medicate? Have you found that any magical or divine encounter you have experienced differ when you are taking medication and when you are not?

Those with depression or other mental health issues: Have you found it difficult to nearly impossible to use magic, speak to your gods, do other such things while in the midst of depression or another mental health issue?

How do you cope/move forward when in these states?

Ah, I hope these questions are not too vague. I am among those who have trouble articulating themselves. Feel free to share, or not.

I have Bi-polar (unspecified), ADHD, and PTSD. I have been diagnosed for any sort of clinical depression, but I do often end up depressed as a result.

I'm medicated for the Bi-polar, though nothing else. In therapy as well. GO me. neutral

I have halted a lot of my mystical and dinvine work until resently, but this was for reasons not realted to my medicine, as I stopped on that venue long before I was medicated.

My mental issues do tend to get in the way of things by themselves however. I have never been able to meditate, as my mind dosen't ever shut up. Further, it's hard for me to focus on anything mystical. Am I listening to my spirit guide, or what I want to hear her say? I can never be sure sometimes. I don't know...hard to explain.

I'm looking foreward to having the ADHD medicated to see if that helps.

Have you considered that this may be only a mental block (i.e. subconsiously imposed)? Failing that, perhaps look into getting a different medication.  

[VisasMarr]

Kuroiban

I have Bi-polar (unspecified), ADHD, and PTSD. I have been diagnosed for any sort of clinical depression, but I do often end up depressed as a result.

I'm medicated for the Bi-polar, though nothing else. In therapy as well. GO me. neutral

I have halted a lot of my mystical and dinvine work until resently, but this was for reasons not realted to my medicine, as I stopped on that venue long before I was medicated.

Ditto here. That is, stopped long before I was medicated. It was a quiet thing, I didn't even notice until later that I stopped searching, stopped experimenting. Now that I am medicated, I have found it hard to "get back on the horse" so to speak.

Kuroiban

My mental issues do tend to get in the way of things by themselves however. I have never been able to meditate, as my mind dosen't ever shut up. Further, it's hard for me to focus on anything mystical. Am I listening to my spirit guide, or what I want to hear her say? I can never be sure sometimes. I don't know...hard to explain.

*nod-nod* My mind used to shut up, but it doesn't any more. But those with severe depression do get ADHD like symptoms, so it's really no surprise.
Have you tried say a moving meditation, like yoga? I have found for myself it really quiets my mind...

Kuroiban

I'm looking foreward to having the ADHD medicated to see if that helps.

Have you considered that this may be only a mental block (i.e. subconsiously imposed)? Failing that, perhaps look into getting a different medication.

I have, and it may very well be. I have a habit of starting many many new things, and never finishing them. It could be my mind's way of stopping me from overloading my plate. I am trying to learn how to take care of myself at the moment (I know it seems strange...but you gotta start somewhere).
I thought about changing my medication, but what I am on now (prozac) has kept me stable enough as to not attempt suicide. Which sadly, is a big risk for me at the moment. But I am thinking of adding Wellbutrin to the mix... so, we'll see.

When you do try to meditate (and I apologise if I'm assuming a bit too much here) do you find that Anxiety is triggered due to your PTSD?

It's weird with me, it seems that when I finally do manage to relax and calm down - for instance meditate I just end up with a mild panic attack, and of course everything bad just pops in my mind, and I cannot banish it....  

[Wood Sorrel]

I have had depression for 5 years, and several months ago I started antidepressants. I do feel more "myself" on the medication, have more energy, am less overreactive about things, am able to balance more things in my life, etc... I don't expect the medication to solve everything, and I hope to discontinue it this spring. I hope to use it as a bridge to get back to an active, normal life by making progress on things that I had fallen behind on when depressed... getting a job, social connections, exercise, etc, while on the medication and getting me going enough that I can continue after I'm off. I have made progress: I've gotten a job, bought a house, invested in a new bike, and I feel really good about these things.

My dad said the main way antidepressants helped him was to help him think of things in a different light. Depression can really warp your thinking, and it's a downward spiral feeding on itself. Medication can help you break those patterns and get a new perspective. It can give you a "boost" that you were incapable of giving yourself. However, these things can also take time. I did not feel a surge of energy when I started the meds. It took time to take new actions.

Anyway, I hope that the meds can help focus and calm your mind. Also, look into other therapies like talk therapy, yoga, etc. These can help with your overall healing, and many times meds work better with other therapies.  

[in the flicker.]

this is a pretty good topic.

almost five years ago, i was been diagnosed with dythymic depression (also called chronic depression) accompanied by stress-induced psychosis (but really, its just anytime it feels like it). a lot of people dont actually know what psychosis is, so i'll take a minute to explain that.
psychosis is characterized by:
hallucinations
delusions/parinoia
lack of insight (being unaware one is acting strangely)
thought disorder (strange mannerisms and speech patterns)

so...do my mental issues get in the way of my spiritual endeavors? yes. mainly because when i DO have hallucinations, they seem real and its hard to know if im interacting with spirits or if my mind is just fritzing. i have no trouble talking to Gaia, no trouble doing rituals. but then again, i dont worship a lot, you know, rituals and such. i try to give homage (in my thoughts and actions) to Gaia every day.

i was on SSRIs (antidepressants) for a couple of years, but they just made me feel worse, it was like "i can't even live my own life by myself, i suck" kind of thing. so i stopped taking them and i just deal with my depressiveness; i've accepted that it's a part of my personality.

i think thats all. if you've got further questions/inquiries, feel free.  

[Kuroiban]

VisasMarr

When you do try to meditate (and I apologise if I'm assuming a bit too much here) do you find that Anxiety is triggered due to your PTSD?

My PTSD is related to being bullied and emotionaly abused in High School, so it hasn't popped up in metaphysical matters as of yet. I haven't tried Yoga yet either, which I might have to look into.  

[VisasMarr]

Wood Sorrel

I have had depression for 5 years, and several months ago I started antidepressants. I do feel more "myself" on the medication, have more energy, am less overreactive about things, am able to balance more things in my life, etc...

That's how I was at first, but it quickly went away sad

Wood Sorrel

I don't expect the medication to solve everything, and I hope to discontinue it this spring. I hope to use it as a bridge to get back to an active, normal life by making progress on things that I had fallen behind on when depressed... getting a job, social connections, exercise, etc, while on the medication and getting me going enough that I can continue after I'm off. I have made progress: I've gotten a job, bought a house, invested in a new bike, and I feel really good about these things.

I am glad to know that you have made progress, that is awesome! I, haven't really made any. In fact, I think I've dug myself a little deeper. I simply do not (most of the time) take care of myself. And, without a healthy mind and body, it's hard to do anything spiritual or magical, much less mundane.

Wood Sorrel

My dad said the main way antidepressants helped him was to help him think of things in a different light. Depression can really warp your thinking, and it's a downward spiral feeding on itself. Medication can help you break those patterns and get a new perspective. It can give you a "boost" that you were incapable of giving yourself. However, these things can also take time. I did not feel a surge of energy when I started the meds. It took time to take new actions.

*nods* Indeed. Though I wouldn't say my own perspective has gone totally healthy (or normal), it is definitly a lot better than it used to be.

Wood Sorrel

Anyway, I hope that the meds can help focus and calm your mind. Also, look into other therapies like talk therapy, yoga, etc. These can help with your overall healing, and many times meds work better with other therapies.

Well, I am going through psychotherapy with a psychiatrist. But I plan to start Cognitive Behavioural therapy with a free Psychologist soon. I have a refurral, I am really just waiting for a call to make an appointment.

Have you found since you started treatment, that your spiritual/magical pursuits are easier or more difficult?  

[VisasMarr]

kirio26

this is a pretty good topic.

almost five years ago, i was been diagnosed with dythymic depression (also called chronic depression) accompanied by stress-induced psychosis (but really, its just anytime it feels like it). a lot of people dont actually know what psychosis is, so i'll take a minute to explain that.
psychosis is characterized by:
hallucinations
delusions/parinoia
lack of insight (being unaware one is acting strangely)
thought disorder (strange mannerisms and speech patterns)

Do you take medication for your psychosis? I have been on again and off again on Risperdal, which is used as an anti-psychotic. It made my brain foggy sad

Before your diagnosis were you seeking a religious/spiritual/magical path? Did you find it interfered? Or do you find it interferes more so now? Or not at all?

kirio26

so...do my mental issues get in the way of my spiritual endeavors? yes. mainly because when i DO have hallucinations, they seem real and its hard to know if im interacting with spirits or if my mind is just fritzing.

sad

kirio26

i have no trouble talking to Gaia, no trouble doing rituals. but then again, i dont worship a lot, you know, rituals and such. i try to give homage (in my thoughts and actions) to Gaia every day.

That is good to read ^^ Do you find Gaia a calming presence? You don't have to answer that if you don't want to wink

kirio26

i was on SSRIs (antidepressants) for a couple of years, but they just made me feel worse, it was like "i can't even live my own life by myself, i suck" kind of thing. so i stopped taking them and i just deal with my depressiveness; i've accepted that it's a part of my personality.

I am glad that you are able to do that. Without anti-depressants I'm pretty useless. I'm quite sure I would have killed myself a few times by now. I am actually sort of afraid to go off of them..

kirio26

i think thats all. if you've got further questions/inquiries, feel free.

Thank you ^^  

[VisasMarr]

Kuroiban

VisasMarr

When you do try to meditate (and I apologise if I'm assuming a bit too much here) do you find that Anxiety is triggered due to your PTSD?

My PTSD is related to being bullied and emotionaly abused in High School, so it hasn't popped up in metaphysical matters as of yet. I haven't tried Yoga yet either, which I might have to look into.

You should, yoga is awesome! Though, it does take a while to get used to.
My last instructor had a really good site, I'll try to find the link for you. It has some good information, and some tips on finding a good yoga class.  

[Doctrix]

I have Paranoid Schizophrenia. I was diagnosed in 2002, and all aspects of my life, including the spiritual, sort of went through a transformation. I mean transformation in the same way that fire transforms! There's no question that it causes problems, but I just patiently keep at things and/or find work-arounds. I joke with my HPS and HP that I'm in the "special ed." Witch class, because we know that my training will take longer and be a lot more difficult than it would be without my disability. Keep taking your meds, keep trying meditation, and keep following your bliss wherever it may lead.  

[CuAnnan]

I am bi-polar deppressive and have been diagnosed with clinical depression at various times.

I have tried various forms of treatment but because of my .... quirky body chemistry, I am allergic to vast quantities of medication. Opiates make me very very ill, Ibuprofen makes me unable to breathe. They put me on prozac, prothieden and something else (but I can't remember offhand).
The prozac left me unfeeling. It instilled in me the kind of apathy towards everything that... well it wasn't pleasant.
The prothieden made me ill so it was never in my system long enough to take effect.
The something else made me ill.. see above.

Then someone recommended that I try St. John's Wort. Combined with the councilling, the St. John's Wort really helped. Then the govt. went and illegalised it. It is now in the same classification of drugs as cannabis. My councillor felt that I no longer needed the SJW so wouldn't write me a prescription (and for the most part, she was right).

Since then I have learned how to deal with the bipolar depression, for the most part, this is within the past four years. My councillor told me that I had adjusted to it to the point that weekly sessions were only draining my resources and that I didn't really need her for anything other than support.  

[Ezinu]

I'm Bi-Polor as well though not diagnosed by a doctore so as far as i know i could have a whole bunch of things but i know im Bi-Polor I am not medicated i dont believe in medication to solve mental problems i understand the chemical reactions in the brain that cause people ot be Bi-Polor and if it works for you thats great keep it up.

I wont do spell work or anything of that sort when im depressed but i pray alot when i am. So in a way it will bring me closer to them I think that when your depressed you should pray to them more they will help you through and teach you the ways that is best for YOU to cope with it and they will bring light to the situation.  

[Starlock]

reagun ban

Then someone recommended that I try St. John's Wort. Combined with the councilling, the St. John's Wort really helped. Then the govt. went and illegalised it. It is now in the same classification of drugs as cannabis.

Wow... it amazes me that they'd illegalize St. John's Wort. That's really to bad... it's a very useful herbal drug to take and can help a lot of people. Has there been any petition to get this changed in your country?  

[bobz]

I'm not always the happybouncy bobz that has often graced these very intarwebs. Even I can get depressed on occasion (Thank the gods never to the level that any meds etc were needed).
It didn't really pose that much of an issue though, more a stumbling block than a serious barrier to my spiritual development, I'd almost count it as helping in a way as it's helped me realise just how much I needed to get off my behind.

[being in the same country as Reagun I can say that there hasn't been any sucessful movement yet to get St John's Wort re-legalised.]  

[in the flicker.]

VisasMarr

Do you take medication for your psychosis? I have been on again and off again on Risperdal, which is used as an anti-psychotic. It made my brain foggy sad

Before your diagnosis were you seeking a religious/spiritual/magical path? Did you find it interfered? Or do you find it interferes more so now? Or not at all?

that is a fairly loaded question, actually. yes, i was seeking a spiritual path AS i developed psychosis, which made things confusing and hard. i was very confused when it first developed because, well, i thought i was just psychic, not psychotic, hehe.

i was never put on an actual regimen of daily anti-psychotics. the psychiatrist gave me a few hydroxyzine (sp) for my psychotic episodes, but i found they didn't help much.

i would say that it's fairly managable now, i just have to make sure i know what im interacting with; i've found that generally, i can predict the actions of my hallucinations, while i cannot predict any spiritual bodies i may encounter. so i would say that it interferes little now.

VisasMarr

kirio26

i have no trouble talking to Gaia, no trouble doing rituals. but then again, i dont worship a lot, you know, rituals and such. i try to give homage (in my thoughts and actions) to Gaia every day.

That is good to read ^^ Do you find Gaia a calming presence? You don't have to answer that if you don't want to wink

i do indeed find her a calming presence. i realize that she has plenty of things to worry about, but it's nice just to talk to her because i know she wont judge what i say or how i feel. its nice.