Faith crisis

[Silver Hound]

With all the stuff that goes around - fluffies at one side, conservative witches at the other - with all the conflicts that I assisted between people with the same path but different ideals, I guess I become a little ceptic to what comes to my faith.
The ingenuity of my fluffy times are over, and now I don't see it as I was seen it. I try to follow what I believe but I question it to many times... but other times it all seem that I returned to the optimism of the beginning.

I don't know if that happens with you guys.. Do you think all the little conflicts that exist in the pagan community aid to this "unhappiness" or "unfullfillment" of many of the pagans, nowdays?

I remembered to post this because is a theme that I discussed with some friends of mine.  

[maenad nuri]

I think the feeling comes whenever the newness rubs off of anything-not just Paganism. While observing our little discussions ^.^ can lead to a sense of disenchantment with other pagans, feeling disenchanted is wholly the response of the individual.

And why is questioning bad? s**t, I have to remind myself that I'm not play-acting from time to time.  

[EternalHearts]

I have to back up Nuri on this. I'm almost constantly in a state of religious crisis, but I think it actually helps me. By discovering disagreements with your own beliefs and those of others, you are better able to narrow down your path and be true to yourself and your god(s). I think the Gods want us to question life and them--if we didn't, how would we truly believe in Them and come to worship Them? Only through self-doubt can we really have faith because, if we have faith in the Gods despite doubt and fear, then we are truly on the path to follow Them.  

[MST3Kakalina]

Questioning keeps from being too fluffy and half-assed about it. it shows you're actually thinking about things, instead of just blindly accepting everything. that applies to any spiritual belief, not just paganism.


that's my $0.02.  

[dark_reki]

MST3Kakalina

Questioning keeps from being too fluffy and half-assed about it. it shows you're actually thinking about things, instead of just blindly accepting everything. that applies to any spiritual belief, not just paganism.


that's my $0.02.

I totally agree with you there. And to be honest I think everyone, regardless of faith, question and when they've been on the path for a while, find the excitement may have died down a little, and a little disenchantment sets in.

The dame can be said of splits in the faith and unhappiness with one another. It happens in all religions, for want of a word, there is always some kind of in fighting. Sadly it's part of being human. Personally I keep out of it, which is why I'm a solitary witch and not with a Coven. If I work with anyone, it will be with my friends, and it will be when I choose to.

So all in all, I'm rather happy with who I am and I only occasionally feel disenchanted. And that's only when I feel I've been lapsy a little in my faith, like at the moment. I've had some changes in my life, mainly work, and so my mind is on one track at the moment. But what I do know, no matter how crap I feel, I haven't left my Paganism behind, not has it taken a back burner. It's who I am, and it's how I live my life. I get up at 6:15am for work, I get on my bike and I cycle a mile to work. I don't think, "s**t it's 6:30 and I'm up cycling to work!" no, I think, s**t it's a beautiful day. Of course, what I'll think when it's dark is another matter...lol!

Oh s**t, I've gone on.....I'll stop now before I bore the pants off you.

Blessings

Cerridwen heart

P.S: I'm about to make this longer lol....After I posted I went to make myself a Green Tea and Lemongrass drink, and whilst the kettle was boiling I popped into my back garden and sat on the step with my beautiful Oaks and Silver Birches looking down on me. I think I know why you feel the way you do. So I re-opened my post in edit mode...

It's that dreaded fluffy thing smile . When you find your Pagan path, and I say find because, in my mind you either are or not a Pagan. It's a way of life, unlike Chritianity. It effect everything in your life, or it should do.

Anyway, I digress. I think that people come in with Rose tinted glasses and assume that ALL Pagans are like the hippies, loving, caring, don't believe in war, etc. And so therefor, don't fight and love one another and all those that surround them. And so when they discover that Pagans are JUST People, with the usual human foibles, they feel shell shocked and disenchanted. I have found, over the years, that Pagans are really not that different than other people. Yes they are more enviromentally contious, more caring towards other living things, but not always so kind to one another.

Now, please don't get me wrong, NOT all Pagans are like that, myself included. I'm not fluffy or nothing, but I guess I'm a little more like what newbies, for want of a word, may expect of a Pagan. I don't believe in fighting, it gets you know where, I try to help others when ever possible, and so forth.

Yep, I think that's what it is...But please, there are some lovely Pagans out there, who arn't fluffy, but could be mistaken for one biggrin

I hope that helps some how.

Now I promise that's it...lol

Hugs & Blessings

Cerridwen heart heart heart  

[maenad nuri]

Um, C? Are you saying that Christianity isn't a way of life?

Because I've got a lot of people who'll disagree.  

[Silver Hound]

Thanks for all your posts biggrin They helped me to understand some things...


I think all religions are ways of life. If they weren't people wouldn't follow it as models for their lives (well... at least some people...lol).

But returning to the main topic..

I guess, when someone discovers Paganism, if they have the bad luck of finding a "to optimistic" book (I think you know what I mean), they will go like - Hey! This thing rocks... I want to follow this and go to a world completely different! - but thats not what happens.

I think most people have a fluffy phase, when they don't understand much of it and so they absorve all kinds of info and belieave in it, with no questions asked. But, as time goes by, the same people start to see that they are living a little of an illusion and that the path they are following is just as normal as the other paths (of course with different values). Most of them enter paganism so they can escape Christianism and affirm themselves as beeing different. But there are the ones that consciencialize (don't know if I wrote that right) that Paganism is more serious and more complex that that. Its not because you are a year and a day learning about Wicca or other brench inside Paganism that you will start to see fairies and dragons or elves...

I think my "problem" was to much criticism after beeing a Fluffly. I looked back and thought - "Oh my god.....I was that?!" - and so I lost some enchantment.
But it all makes part of growing. I had my Fluffy friends that now are nothing like it. Each of us tend to grow, and if we started with Wicca, we spread into different paths as we learned more.
Paganism is more simple and modest than most people thing (even pagans), and I am preety sure that's what confuses many of us.

Well I guess I wrote to much... It is probably a mess, but I woke up a while ago and so my ideas aren't quite clear.  

[Arawath]

I think we were all first attracted to paganism (whatever branches/denominations/paths of it) for the same reason: it was something different that was interesting. However, that's not the reason people stayed with it. Once you get by that initial flush of fascination, you start reaching the underlying depths...the really complex, profound, meaningful stuff that makes it a religion and not a fad. That eager interest turns into a connection, if you like what you find. If you don't, well...you move on to something else.

Of course we miss the times when it was all a simple, perfect idea. Although exploring all of the contradictions and imperfections is necessary, it makes things complicated. The problem with Paganism is it doesn't have a firm basis. In fact, the practicing bodies within each faith barely have anything to agree about...so what does that mean? It means you have to make the foundation yourself. You have to find your own credo, 'cause there sure as hell isn't a Bible to follow. Existing in that constant state of accept/reject can be exhausting. What we have decide is whether it's still worth it.  

[Amber Ocean]

I often feel the same way. I'm not sure how to deal with it, but I have the same feelings.

I guess being true to your heart and going after what you believe in are the best points of advice I can give. Sorry I can't be of more help.  

[dark_reki]

Nuri

Um, C? Are you saying that Christianity isn't a way of life?

Because I've got a lot of people who'll disagree.

Well, I guess from my point of view and the people I knew, it wasn't, not in the same way Paganism is for me.

Although, as you say, there will be those who disagree and quit rightly. For may people their faith is a way of life, but I found many where it wasn't it was warn more like a fashionable label..sadly.

For myself, I was baptised and confirmed to get close to my grandmother and totally regrested it, I felt almost embarassed by my faith. And please don't ask me why, that's something I can't answer because I don't know why.  

[dark_reki]

I personally wasn't drawn to Pagansim because it was different,although, as it has been said, many are. I was drawn because it was me, the way of thinking was how I thought and felt and so I realised that, regardless of what path I'd followed in the past, I was always pagan and it was probably why I never truly fit in anywhere. Nothing made sense, where as Paganism made total sense to me....It was, in some ways, a little shocking revelation....lol  

[Talperiel the Harassed]

lol, welcome to the next step. I have found that once a person has outgrown the fluffy stage htey reach a stage of ever questioning faith. This is totally normal! question everything around you and then question the answers you reach. it happens to many so don't get discouraged.  

[TeaDidikai]

I was tooling around and I saw this thread.

I myself have been on this path for a lifetime thus far, and to be honest, I'm starting to have a bit of a Crisis of Faith myself.

I belong to a path that has some roots in metagenetics, and I'm not a kula rati ("pure blood, or black blood"), and to be blunt, the gods and I haven't really "talked" in a long time. It feels like a stale marriage- you know the kind were the couple sleep in seperate rooms every night and it makes me a little heart-sick.  

[PurpleDragonsGems]

I'm always worried about being a fluff. unless i am absolutly sure about somthing, i won't post it. (hence why i don't post much sweatdrop ). and i don't exactly get time to practice. i do force time for the Full Moon..but thats almost all i can manage. i share a room, so meditation is out, i have no job, so i can't really get anywhere to get anything.  

[Doctrix]

Doubt is a good thing! Embrace it! You'll either come back to Paganism stronger than ever, or find something better for you! But if you're feeling "unhappy" and "unfulfilled" with Paganism in general, perhaps it just never was the right path for you, and you're only beginning to see it now that the shiny-newness has worn off.