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Diana Vyn // Problematic Mother Hen // Approved

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OpticPeach

Otherworldly Bear

PostPosted: Wed May 11, 2016 8:18 am


DIANA VYN



PROBLEMATIC MOTHER HEN
Diana is nothing if not accommodating. Sick and need someone to bring you soup? She'll be right on it. Broke and need a ride home? She'll call a taxi and give you the last penny to her name if it helps. While she may have been an orphan, that doesn't mean anyone else has to have a hard time in life. She'll take you into her home and help with whatever she can. She's a bit too trusting of people, and can get into quit a bit of trouble because of it.

STICKY FINGERS
Growing up Diana got into quite a bit of trouble. She bounced from orphanage to orphanage, never really knowing a stable home. As a teenager she began a downward spiral into crime, stealing at first to eat but eventually getting to the point where she was stealing for more than that. Her reign of petty theft lasted a couple of years from town to town until she was finally caught, spending jail time as punishment. While she may be out now, she is still on probation and is expected to report in on time every month. Any break in it and it's back to jail with her. Being a huge kleptomaniac has made it difficult for her, and she is constantly on edge everywhere she goes because of this. While she has managed to get herself a job, she's under constant watch. Being able to leave town is out of the question for her, and as hard as she tries to keep out of trouble she does have a little bit of a reputation making it hard for her to really make too many friends.

LUCKY NUMBER 7

Diana is oddly lucky with dice rolls and number games.

ANYTHING ELSE?


    - is a kleptomaniac
    - has a cat named Akali who is a huge d**k
    - has an odd obsession with gambling, especially blackjack
    - works at The Thrifty Nickle
    - played here
PostPosted: Sun May 15, 2016 11:59 am


I'm seeing a bit of a disconnect between someone who'll give up the last penny to her name and someone who can't commit--however these traits can work really well together, so I would like to see just a little more elucidation--is she just really madly impulsive? or what's going on in there?

I'd also like a little more expansion in the trouble. How does this affect her socially? Being a convicted criminal affects her employment prospects, where she can live, etc--so I'd just like to see a little more on that ~

Quote me back when you're ready :3

OpticPeach

shibrogane
Vice Captain

Stellar Lightbringer


OpticPeach

Otherworldly Bear

PostPosted: Wed Jul 27, 2016 4:07 pm


shibrogane


Well I just dropped the ball on this oops. I updated it a bit, if it doesn't fully answer things just let me know and I'll try to fix it up more.
PostPosted: Mon Aug 01, 2016 12:24 pm


OpticPeach


Hey!

My only criticism is that your high concept is a bit long. It should only be a couple of sentences. The first few sentences I think are really spot on to the concept though so I'd suggest moving everything after 'When you give too much, there's not a lot left for yourself after all.' Into an expanded personality section under 'anything else?'

Besides that, I think it looks good. If you revise feel free to quote shibe again for review/approval!

iloveyouDIE
Crew

Unstoppable OTP

27,425 Points
  • Falling For You 25
  • Married 100
  • OTP 200

OpticPeach

Otherworldly Bear

PostPosted: Thu Aug 18, 2016 5:27 pm


shibrogane
PostPosted: Sat Aug 20, 2016 10:35 am


Approved!!

shibrogane
Vice Captain

Stellar Lightbringer

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