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Posted: Sun Dec 09, 2012 11:01 am
Okay well, a few nights ago my boyfriend came out and told me he's bisexual, he started by just saying that he thinks some guys are cute, but I kept coaxing him and he eventually told me that he used to have a boyfriend and they had sex and all that fancy stuff.
I'm not against the LGBT community AT ALL, I fully support a person's right to love who they want. I'm not judging him for his sexuality... I'm just worried. We've been dating for quite a while, we've had sex, blah blah blah, and he assures me that he's very attracted to me and doesn't want to be with a guy but I'm just paranoid.
One of my guy-friends named Matthew told everyone that he was bi, however he later broke up with his girlfriend and revealed he was gay.
I don't want that to happen to me. |:
has anyone else ever been in a situation/had paranoia about this? maybe i'm just overreacting..
tl;dr : my boyfriend told me he's bi. my best friend matthew did the same thing then broke up with his girlfriend and confessed he was actually gay. i'm paranoid it's going to happen to me. do you think i should be so paranoid?
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Posted: Sun Dec 09, 2012 12:11 pm
I definitly think you should be concerned because it sounds like your boyfriend is confused about what he really wants. Its great that you support him, but I also know that no girl wants to be in that situation where they aren't absolutely sure of their partners sexual attraction to them. I think you are paranoid because if it does turn out that he wants to date guys then that would mean that your romantic relationship with him would be ending and you would be forced to start someting new.
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Posted: Sun Dec 09, 2012 12:27 pm
Oh, here's something to help. I have been in a relationship for 10 months; At the 8 month mark, my boyfriend told me he was bisexual. I, as you may imagine, freaked out a little.
Anywho, if he really wants to be with you, he won't be stupid and leave you because of sexuality. Supporting him is vital. So, kudos to you!
If he says he is attached to you, then there is absolutely nothing to worry about. Trust is key in all situations. So, trust him to hold true to his words.
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Posted: Sun Dec 09, 2012 2:38 pm
Meline Moon I definitly think you should be concerned because it sounds like your boyfriend is confused about what he really wants. Its great that you support him, but I also know that no girl wants to be in that situation where they aren't absolutely sure of their partners sexual attraction to them. I think you are paranoid because if it does turn out that he wants to date guys then that would mean that your romantic relationship with him would be ending and you would be forced to start someting new. I'm just so nervous because he's the first boy I've ever loved, I gave him my virginity, I can't imagine my life with out him etc etc, and the thought of losing him over something that's so out of control just makes me want to cry. ;_;
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Posted: Sun Dec 09, 2012 2:43 pm
Signum Ignis Oh, here's something to help. I have been in a relationship for 10 months; At the 8 month mark, my boyfriend told me he was bisexual. I, as you may imagine, freaked out a little.
Anywho, if he really wants to be with you, he won't be stupid and leave you because of sexuality. Supporting him is vital. So, kudos to you!
If he says he is attached to you, then there is absolutely nothing to worry about. Trust is key in all situations. So, trust him to hold true to his words. I am trying to do that most definitely! I have so much trust in my boyfriend, but when it comes to matters of sexuality and 'what the heart wants'.. well, the heart wants what the heart wants. gonk and i worry that if some guy comes along it won't be me anymore.
i'll probably be much less worried about this in a few months, it's just still fresh on my mind. but freaking out on gaia makes me feel a little better rofl
hearing what you said about you and your boyfriend is comforting, glad to know i'm not the only one emotion_bigheart
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Posted: Sun Dec 09, 2012 2:50 pm
Rambling on Gaia is helpful, as observed. :3 It's a good thing to let things out. ^.^
Its difficult to think that someone else could come along, then completely replace you. Well, just think about this; So, you and your boyfriend have been in a relationship for a while, no? Even before he said he was bisexual, you were always the one he chose out of, how many other woman in the world? Granted, adding males in makes things more complicated, minus all the others whom are heterosexual.
As for advice, let him know how much he means to you. :3 Maybe even have a soft conversation on how you are worried about the future. Just be open with him. Trust me, it helps a lot! :3
And, its nice to know I am not the only one. x3
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Posted: Sun Dec 09, 2012 3:10 pm
Signum Ignis Rambling on Gaia is helpful, as observed. :3 It's a good thing to let things out. ^.^
Its difficult to think that someone else could come along, then completely replace you. Well, just think about this; So, you and your boyfriend have been in a relationship for a while, no? Even before he said he was bisexual, you were always the one he chose out of, how many other woman in the world? Granted, adding males in makes things more complicated, minus all the others whom are heterosexual.
As for advice, let him know how much he means to you. :3 Maybe even have a soft conversation on how you are worried about the future. Just be open with him. Trust me, it helps a lot! :3
And, its nice to know I am not the only one. x3 Yeah. He did choose me ^-^ He says he wants to marry me, to have kids with me and be with me forever, and I guess if that's what he says I have no reason to not believe it. (:
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Posted: Sun Dec 09, 2012 3:15 pm
There you go! Just think of that, and it won't seem so bad.~
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Posted: Sun Dec 09, 2012 5:19 pm
L4uren Meline Moon I definitly think you should be concerned because it sounds like your boyfriend is confused about what he really wants. Its great that you support him, but I also know that no girl wants to be in that situation where they aren't absolutely sure of their partners sexual attraction to them. I think you are paranoid because if it does turn out that he wants to date guys then that would mean that your romantic relationship with him would be ending and you would be forced to start someting new. I'm just so nervous because he's the first boy I've ever loved, I gave him my virginity, I can't imagine my life with out him etc etc, and the thought of losing him over something that's so out of control just makes me want to cry. ;_;Yeah, the first ones are special. If it does happen that he is gay, then there is nothing you can do about it. All you can do is enjoy the time you have in the present and worry about future problems later if they arrive.
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Posted: Sun Dec 09, 2012 6:04 pm
yeah, you're right ^ thanks emotion_bigheart
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Posted: Sun Dec 09, 2012 6:17 pm
I'm bi, my boyfriend's bi-curious. We've been dating for almost seven years. It's not a big deal. :]
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Posted: Sun Dec 09, 2012 6:22 pm
Wow, this is all very confusing and a bit overwhelming I can imagine. I think your paranoia is perfectly normal, I myself would be rather worried if my boyfriend revealed this to me. Perhaps you should talk to your boyfriend about these fears and discuss it with him, hoping to put your heart at rest and not feel so unsettled. Communication is key to any relationship ~ you can't just expect the other person to know what you're feeling. He himself might be worried as well, who knows, it very much could benefit you both.
Hope I helped~
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Posted: Sun Dec 09, 2012 7:13 pm
My husband is also bi. I work things out by pegging him and buying toys to satisfy himself solo or together c:
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Posted: Mon Dec 24, 2012 7:17 pm
If it turns out that hes gay, there's really nothing you can do. Just try not to harbor any ill feelings toward him for feeling the way that he does. But, if that's not the case, trust him that hes sincere about how he feels about you. You may support him for his sexuality, but if you act to concerned that he likes the male gender more than you, its going to come off to him that you're against him being bi. Just try to be careful seeing how this is a sensitive subject.
Also, having a Bi boyfriend can be fun. You can have kinky three ways with another man and you can get some toys to peg him with XD
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Posted: Wed Jan 09, 2013 4:01 pm
Your friend Matthew was probably still in the closet when dating that girl. Your boyfriend I'd assume isn't since he's already had a serious relationship with a man and then chose to date you, plus he confessed his bisexuality to you. Personally, I don't think you should be worrying at all, but I can understand how that's hard to do. Hopefully you'll be reassured with time.
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