It's pretty good, I could imagine the real Naruto saying this too. This is by far the best in character Sasuke besides Sasuke Baka and Playing with Toys. This is small but some grammar mistakes like, “You have everybody in konoha begging for you!! SAKURA CRYING FOR YOU!!” Sakura's crying for you.
Other than that it's really well written.
DeficientLoser
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Hypothermic Poseidon
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Posted: Tue Aug 10, 2010 11:08 pm
thankies so much!!
Posted: Tue Aug 10, 2010 11:41 pm
No, it's not a grammar mistake. If you think about how it sounds, you can connect the two.
''You have everybody in Konoha begging for you! -and- Sakura crying for you!''
He's adding on that Sakura is crying for him. It makes sense eventually, if you say it over and over in your head.