No More Heroes

[Hoxtalicious]

Again it's insomnia, though this time paired with a dislike for heroic characters and the need to write an intro to a Dark Heresy game coming soon. Sorry if it sucks Winnie. sweatdrop

+ + +

Always the gardens of Hesperia, that beautiful riot of colour and greenery plotted into nice and orderly plots. He had been there as a child, awed and amazed by those beautiful gardens. He always remembered that sight, drawing strength and peace from it in times of distress or despair. Sometimes his warp-fuelled dreams would take him there, it was the one place the daemons of his dreams could not follow him, try as they might. They always withered and died when trying to tread upon the green grass. The gardens represented something good and wholesome, something so pure nothing could taint it. Not even the seven years of hard crusading, not even when putting the Eternal Haven to the torch, not even when he was arrested and recruited by the inquisition. It had always been his purest ideal.

Until now.

With a gasp Jaq Daziel wrenched into motion, half his face numbed from lying on the cold metal deck. He tried to push himself up but his hands slipped away, slamming his body back onto the deck with a slam. He felt the liquid on his face and tasted its coppery quality.

Blood.

He fought down the urge to rise in a rush, instead he slowly got to his knees, shocked at what lay around him. His erstwhile comrades and friends, some of them very dear to him, lay dead around him. They were torn to shreds. He crawled over to a pile of viscera and body parts, checking for survivors. He found the head of Paul, that damned cripple and his brother Al, also torn to shreds. A little further away lay Dan and Martin, their bodies also a ragged pile of spare body parts and organs.

Turning round he saw Lily lying there. Lily, sweet Lily. She had no mark on her and as he touched her cheek his worst fears were confirmed. With a futile gesture he checked for a pulse. None. He stroked her cheek once more, feeling anger and shame bubble inside him.

Nobody was left alive but Jaq. Why?

He remembered the insertion, the team docking with the ancient station via a small lighter. They were tasked with a simple recon in force. There were just six of them: Paul, Al, Martin and Dan, whom were ex-guardsmen from the same regiment as Jaq. And there was Lily, a vicious woman who was formerly a hunter on some feral world. Jaq had taken a liking to her and she to him. He was by her side when the enemy struck, when a massive concussive force hit him and knocked him out. He wondered what had happened to the others.

‘This I swear by the Emperor, hallowed be thy name.’ He knelt down besides the body of Lily and took her hand in both of his. ‘I swear that I will avenge you my love, my friend, my comrade. I will end the lives of those responsible and I will atone for the sin of surviving where you have fallen. I will do so, or die trying. This I swear.’

He reverently let go of hand and got up, flicking the safety off his carbine, feeling the weapon hum in his hands. He felt confident. His weapon was loaded, his coat of mail armour still intact and he was aware of his surroundings, he wouldn’t be surprised a second time.

Jaq did not have to wait long for his foe to arrive.

A large mutant burst from a wall nearby, easily shredding itself a way through the rusted material with an oversized blade that crudely grafted in place of its hand. Jaq brought up his carbine and managed to snap off a trio of shots before the monster struck, simply ignoring the laser bolts biting into its thick skin.

Jaq let out a frustrated scream, feebly tugging at the massive blade puncturing his gut. The fabled mail coat that his regiment was outfitted with had done little to stop the strike from penetrating him. With a guttural grunt he was cast aside, the large mutant paying no more heed to him as it lumbered back to its unseen master through the broken wall. Jaq lay in a painful heap by the remains of his erstwhile comrades. He saw Lily lying there, her dead eyes still open, staring at the rusted ceiling. All the while sobbing Jaq crawled over, pulling the dead girl close to him.

‘I’m so sorry,’ was all he could manage in between the sobs and pain. He kept repeating it over and over again, slowly caressing her blonde hair with a bloodied hand. He had failed her and the Emperor, those thoughts wracked his minds for the last few agonizing moments of his life.  

[Vikki Stardust]

Pretty grim-dark. Its not disney, its not pretty, congrats youve written something that people wont like because its not funny or has a happy ending. It wouldve been even better if the girl was also torn to shreds or raped to ribbons instead of just lying there. How did she die btw? Being vague is another thing that wont win you sympathy around here.  

[Hoxtalicious]

I don't write to placate the cockmunchers here.

The death of the girl is something for the future gaming group to figure out.  

[Lady Blodwynn]

Oh this will do perfectly, I guess you're in on some thing that the others aren't. I guess our team is team two about to be sent in. Hopefully we'll do better than these guys. sweatdrop  

[Hoxtalicious]

Actually, I haven't got an idea what has killed the girl. It could be.. eek Ah, it is pretty predictable really. You're a clever detective, this should be a piece of cake for you. wink  

[Caleidah]

Not bad at all. Certainly a good opener, mostly due to the fact that you left more questions to be dealt with than you answered. The thing that I'm the most curious about is that "fabled mail" that you've got them wearing.

Very dark. Very visceral. I love it when people depict blood in such a way that I get the taste in my mouth.  

[Hoxtalicious]

Most of the answers will hopefully be drawn from the upcoming Dark Heresy sessions.

As for the fabled mail; in front of my monitor I have my little hall of fame where I put models other people painted up for me, including a guardsman with bolter, a Dark Angel, an Elysian and a Vostroyan sergeant, who is wearing a mail coat instead of carapace armour. I might go into the mail for later descriptions, but for now it is just a handy substitute for the always used flak armour.  

[Lady Blodwynn]

You know, you could have your navy man come from the same world as the guardsmen. Maybe work a little something into his background about this regiment. Not all hive worlds have to be fume choked rad wastes filled with toxic miasmas. Maybe gigantic spires of gleaming white and silver dotted with plateaus of gardens, the plains around these massive structures filled with massive gardens and green fields. I can already picture it in my mind, with waterfalls of clean water flowing from one plateau to the other.  

[Hoxtalicious]

Moments like these made me want to kick Vikki out and take you in instead. I think something along the lines of the paradise hive world of Hesperus could be done. Just don't copyright it! xp  

[DarkElf27]

Caleidah

Very dark. Very visceral. I love it when people depict blood in such a way that I get the taste in my mouth.

Nice, Mac, you made him bite his cheek.  

[Hoxtalicious]

Excellent, another satisfied customer. Maybe now I can sleep soundly.  

[Lady Blodwynn]

Lt. Brookman

Moments like these made me want to kick Vikki out and take you in instead. I think something along the lines of the paradise hive world of Hesperus could be done. Just don't copyright it! xp

Don't kick her out, can't you put her in the cellar instead? ninja Or lock her in a room far away from where we are, lest we be interrupted by her screaming.  

[Hoxtalicious]

Lady Blodwynn

Lt. Brookman

Moments like these made me want to kick Vikki out and take you in instead. I think something along the lines of the paradise hive world of Hesperus could be done. Just don't copyright it! xp

Don't kick her out, can't you put her in the cellar instead? ninja Or lock her in a room far away from where we are, lest we be interrupted by her screaming.

Someone is developing a dark streak.  

[DarkElf27]

Lt. Brookman

Lady Blodwynn

Lt. Brookman

Moments like these made me want to kick Vikki out and take you in instead. I think something along the lines of the paradise hive world of Hesperus could be done. Just don't copyright it! xp

Don't kick her out, can't you put her in the cellar instead? ninja Or lock her in a room far away from where we are, lest we be interrupted by her screaming.

Someone is developing a dark streak.

I blame it on the dark writing styles; it was going to rub off on your fans eventually.  

[Lady Blodwynn]

DarkElf27

Lt. Brookman

Lady Blodwynn

Lt. Brookman

Moments like these made me want to kick Vikki out and take you in instead. I think something along the lines of the paradise hive world of Hesperus could be done. Just don't copyright it! xp

Don't kick her out, can't you put her in the cellar instead? ninja Or lock her in a room far away from where we are, lest we be interrupted by her screaming.

Someone is developing a dark streak.

I blame it on the dark writing styles; it was going to rub off on your fans eventually.

Heavens no! I'm not that easily swayed. I blame it on Vikki, she's the one who just like Gríma Wormtongue whispered into my ear, slowly exerting her influences over me.

Hopefully I get rub something off on Mel, maybe be his next muse or source of inspiration. whee