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| What would you do? |
| Lock the computer ... and doors and windows! |
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27% |
[ 14 ] |
| Find a good software program |
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49% |
[ 25 ] |
| Fugetaboutit -- nuttin' you can do |
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23% |
[ 12 ] |
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| Total Votes : 51 |
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 Posted: Mon Sep 01, 2008 3:16 pm
I've been trying to figure out what program, etc. I can install to block my sons' inappropriate web searches (one: preg stuff and the other Naruto porn!)
Have you dealt with this and what did you do?
Thanks!!
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Posted: Mon Sep 01, 2008 3:18 pm
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Posted: Mon Sep 01, 2008 3:24 pm
Personally I'd ban him from the computer. End of.
Surely use of the computer is a priveledge? If he can't be responsible enough to follow the rules you've set then perhaps he doesn't deserve the priveledge?
But then again my parents were really strict with stuff like that. (lol, not that we had anything as interesting as computers back then! but you know what I mean!) It's harsh but it works.
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Posted: Mon Sep 01, 2008 3:32 pm
one is 17 (just turned) and the other will be turning 14.
Banning does make sense; however, I guess I'm a bit of a parental wimp (that's hard to admit!), also, they do need access to the computer for research, etc.
I do have the computer in the living room, and anyone walking by can see what they're doing, etc. but I'm most seriously leaning toward a package called Webwatcher (webwatchernow.com) ...
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Posted: Mon Sep 01, 2008 3:56 pm
if you're the average user just using windows and Internet Explorer, I'd suggest getting into the internet options, going to the content tab and enabling the content advisor.
if that doesn't work, then you'll have to get some kind of additional parental control type software.
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Posted: Mon Sep 01, 2008 4:52 pm
Honestly, it's perfectly normal for boys that age to investigate these matters. In earlier days, they would have been caught hanging around the men's rack in the magazine store - or some sympathetic fellow might have gifted them with a Playboy or two. If you make too much fuss, you'll just encourage them to seek it out more.
I would suggest a heart-to-heart where you tell them what bothers you and why and maybe get a reading on where they are. If they're using it for visual aids, it's not much different from a magazine. If they're thinking they can find a real-life model to be their girlfriends, you may have a problem. And, how much are they dwelling on this aspect? Is it the only activity they do on the internet in their free time, or is it a sometimes thing?
If you really think they have a problem, buy the software.
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Posted: Mon Sep 01, 2008 5:44 pm
personally, the only problem I see with it is that the 14y/o might see something, but even someone at that age these days is gonna know enough about that kind of stuff that it's not going to be traumatizing or anything.
then like Caither said, just have a one-on-one(or one-on-two if the 14y/o is involved) with him discussing how you feel.
then being a computer geek, my higher concern is for that poor computer if it's not well protected.
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Posted: Mon Sep 01, 2008 6:13 pm
that's a natural curiosity for boys that age, trying to block him from exploring his sexuality through porn may not be very effective as it may just force him to find ways around your attempts, when i was growing up my mom did everything she could to keep porn out of the reach of my brothers and they still ended up with it, i'd chalk it up to "boys will be boys".
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Posted: Mon Sep 01, 2008 6:48 pm
fr34x0r personally, the only problem I see with it is that the 14y/o might see something, but even someone at that age these days is gonna know enough about that kind of stuff that it's not going to be traumatizing or anything. then like Caither said, just have a one-on-one(or one-on-two if the 14y/o is involved) with him discussing how you feel. then being a computer geek, my higher concern is for that poor computer if it's not well protected.I personally would either use the parental controls on windows, you can use that to block sites. If you want to go with parental programs, there are many available to download... just read the reviews to find the one that suits your needs. Then I will inforce what my son said... Your computer will be attacked in high force when they surf those type of sites... viruses are a huge concern.
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Posted: Mon Sep 01, 2008 6:56 pm
My daughter had the same issue. I got the browser my ISP provided, and set her ID settings for pre-teen. That means no site above PG-13 type could be accessed, and all other ID's were password protected. If your ISP is SBC, you can do that without buying additional software.
She eventually got over it, though. Manga and Hentai are too similar sometimes.
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Posted: Mon Sep 01, 2008 10:56 pm
If it is your 17 year old that's been looking up the pornographic material, it might just be because he's curious about sex. He is at that age where it is going to be on his mind more and more. While I do see you having a problem with either one view pornographic material, seeing as they are underage, especially your 14 year old, just try to realize that they're only doing it because they're curious. Like fr34x0r mentioned, I think it's time for a heart to heart to let them know you're uncomfortable with it. I remember when I had to have "that" talk with my mother, but it honestly made me feel better to know that she would sit down with me and talk to me like an adult about adult topics. But like my mother stated, she'd always be uncomfortable with the idea that I was sexually active, no matter what my age because it's hard to think your kids are of that age.
Just keep in mind that he's not looking at the pornography to be a perv, he's probably just curious about sex.
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Posted: Mon Sep 01, 2008 11:19 pm
Yeah ive dealt with it. With my boyfriend. He kept going to a porn site and I kept getting viruses and spyware. I put a lock on but I cant remember how. Its a pain in the butt though. Every time I go to a page I have to type in this really long password, and its getting annoying.
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Posted: Mon Sep 01, 2008 11:29 pm
I had the talk with my younger sister and it resulted in no perceived change. By that I mean that similar sites popped up on her account's history. The talk was not followed with blocks on websites or anything fancy.
I was frank in asking my brother about a pornographic image I found and he claimed no responsibility and instead blamed a friend. In this instance, we were using an unprotected computer... a windows 98.
I was upset in both instances, but for different reasons.
I'm no parent, i'm only 21. From my experience, though, you are going to have to be stern or allow the occasional browsing on their part. Just make sure that your computer is protected. Your sons already know what they want. Your computer is not the only computer they can find it on if they become that desperate.
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Posted: Tue Sep 02, 2008 6:40 am
I put on a nanny program on my computer and a seperate log-in after I found out he was looking for porn (13). It works wonders because I cantrack where he has been and what he is doing.
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Posted: Tue Sep 02, 2008 11:36 am
You got some great suggestions. I also put the computer in the middle of the house so anybody using it has no real privacy. So I can walk by and read and he can read mine. Its been great cuz we can sometimes talk about what he's doing and vice versa.
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