• A pest annoyed me today,
    He emailed me night and day,
    He asked if I were single,
    and asked, how do you do?

    He asked all kinds of questions,
    wanted all the details,
    of my very private life,
    insisted that I tell him,

    Age, sex and location,
    he insisted that I share,
    along with exact sizes,
    of my bras and underwear,

    I politely said no,
    refused all his requests,
    I told him very sternly,
    Stop this, stop being a nuisanceice, (ha not a word)

    he kept on poppin up,
    he asked if I were wed,
    by then I was quite annoyed,
    by all the things he'd said,

    I asked him which part of NO,
    he didn't understand,
    I told him I was 85,
    and wore 6 wedding bands, (its ment to be rings but it didnt rhime with understand)

    but all my husbands now were gone,
    and I had all their money,
    you want to know about,
    their accidents now, honey?

    I told him I farted when I walk,
    the hair's gone from my head,
    I keep my teeth in a jar,
    and at night I wet the bed,

    Sometimes I wander nude down the street,
    till somebody brings me home to sleep,
    you wanna get together,
    so I won't be all alone?

    Suddenly the emails stopped
    so I wrote him an email instead,
    a little sign then popped up
    that said he was offline,

    I giggled and I guffawed,
    I chuckled and I laughed,
    I doubt it seriously,
    if my stalker will come back!